FEAR OF FOOD... BEING POISIONED...

CYNDI49 · Post by **CYNDI49** » Sun Nov 11, 2007 12:26 pm

I HAVE SUCH A FEAR OF FOOD.. THAT WHEN I EAT I WATCH THE CLOCK FOR 1 HOUR TO MAKE SURE NO ONE DRUGED ME...THIS HAS BEEN GOING ON FOR 26 YEARS.. DUE TO MY X HUSBANDS FRIENDS TELLING ME ONE TIME THAT THEY WANTED TO SEE ME HIGH...AND WERE GOING TO PUT SOMETHING IN EITHER MY FOOD DRINK, ETC.. WELL, I HAVE CARRIED THIS ON THROUGHOUT THE YEARS AND STILL CAN'T SEEM TO BREAK THIS AWEFUL CYCLE... I AM VERY LEARY ON WHERE I EAT, IF THE COOK LOOKS GOOFY OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT I WILL NOT EAT AT THE RESTAURANT, IF SOMEONE WALKS BY MY TABLE AND THEY ARE A TEENAGER OR SOMEONE I FEEL I CAN'T TRUST WELL GUESS WHAT THE FOOD SITS THERE...I WILL NOT EAT IT.... I WOULD NEVER EVER EAT ANYTHING THAT IS LAYING OUT ... EVEN AT A FAMILY PARTY... I HAVE SEEN MY NEW HUSBAND JUST ENJOY HIS FOOD, CAKE, COFFE, SODA... AND I JUST GO NUTS INSIDE THINKIN I WISH I COULD HAVE SOME... SOMETIMES I WILL HAVE HIM TEST MY FOOD BEFOR I EAT IT...WHEN I AM DONE EATING OR TAKING PILLS, I WATCH THE CLOCK FOR ONE HOUR TO MAKE SURE I AM OK...GRRRRR... I HATE THIS... CLOCK WATCHER!! ALSO, IN THAT 1 HOUR I AM ON HIGH ANXIETY... HAVE HAD PANIC ATTACTS... AND THINKING THAT SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH WHAT I ATE... AND ITS JUST THAT I WORKED MYSELF UP...TO THE PANIC ATTACK...BUT THE PANIC ATTACK CAN MAKE YOU FEEL LIKE SOMEONE PUT SOMETHING IN YOUR FOOD, DRINK, ETC... OMG, THIS I WISH I COULD OVER COME AND JUST DON'T KNOW HOW... PLEASE HAS ANYONE ELSE HAD THIS TYPE OF DISORDER...?????? I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU....THANKS SO MUCH FOR THE FRIENDSHIP YOU ALL HAVE SHOWN TO ME.. O, ONE MORE THING IS THERE ANYTHING IN THE NEW PROGRAM THAT HAS THIS TYPE OF DISORDER... I SHOULD BE GETTING MINE THIS WEEK...
THANKS SO MUCH AGAIN...

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Nov 11, 2007 2:25 pm

Hello CYNDI, I suffer from what you are talking about. It has caused me to loose so much weight, that people approach me and ask me if I am sick or something.I dont know how to make it stop, or if the program will touch base on that subject.Im only on week four of the program and have to send it back due to lack of money.But I will pray that it works for you.Keep thinking positive, and dont give up on it.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Nov 14, 2007 4:58 pm

First, Pat....don't send the program back, they will work with you if you have a lack of money.

About the food thing, I have had that before and it is horrible, I have also been afraid to eat almost every kind of food at one point or another for years at a time for fear of a horrible allergic reaction.....it sucks to watch other people enjoy food that you just cannot allow yourself to eat. You just have to take baby steps outside of your comfort zone to overcome it.

Chrystal

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Nov 14, 2007 10:46 pm

Hey,

I had something like this for a while when people that knew me broke into my apartment.I threw anything that they could play with away and after that concentrated on single one time feedings of food in can or things that are tamper resistant.Things are pretty well sealed these days.You may want to try to wean away the clock meaning move the clock from view and go outside or divert your time and attention some place else.After a while if you really get fed up with it you can say,"I'm going to eat and if I die so what",.In the end your not feeding yourdelf and the fear is feeding off of you.

Hope this helps

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu Nov 22, 2007 1:47 am

I know exactly what you mean, but in the opposite way! First of all, Happy Thanksgiving! It's also my birthday and i think im trying so hard to feel good because i want today to be a good day. But then yesterday, I was making pecan pie and i remembered i used the same teaspoon I used to measure out bleach earlier that day. I know for a fact i washed the teaspoon afterwards with hot water and soap but then the thought comes in, "What are there is bleach in the pie? people who eat it will get sick and die. how awful. i would be responsible." Then as i was by the opened oven today, i thought when i talked i felt spit kind of fly out. Then i thought "what if my spit landed on the turkey?" Again the thoughts followed by saying, "people will eat it, get sick and die from my germs." Now when i write it out, it feels kind of funny. Should I just say, "Okay Noelle, What you are experiencing is just a side effect of your obsessive thinking. I did all i could do and I'm only in control of so much. I will go with these feelings and let them pass. It's just anxiety. Today will be a good day filled with thanks, love and celebration. I'm okay. I've always been okay."

I fear I spit on the plate. When someone eats off it today, they will eat my germs and get sick. They will die.

Instead I can say,
Here is that OCD thought getting the best of me. It is possible my germs got on the plate and someone will get sick and die, But what are the chances? It is highly unlikely to happen. I will go with this feeling and let it pass. It's just anxiety.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Fri Nov 23, 2007 10:04 am

Noelle. First of all <span class="ev_code_RED">HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!</span>.

You're on to a good start at changing the negatives, but you must tell yourself that everything is okay. Because it is and nobody's going to get sick and die from your germs because spit got on the turkey. If you spit on the turkey before you cooked it, the heat from the oven would kill the germs; and if you spit on it after it was cooked, nobody would get sick and die. It would take a lot more than spit to kill someone.

Everything is okay.
Take care Noelle. DeeDee.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue May 13, 2008 4:51 pm

Hi,

I cant believe someone else has the exact same problem i have...I came to search this board to find out if i was the only one...It sounds exactly to a tee what i feel.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue May 13, 2008 4:53 pm

And you live in michigan too! Maybe we can be board buddies and go through the program together...(i just got mine today)
My email is raaainbow@yahoo.com