Help with self-fulfilling thoughts!!

[meme23]

Hi...i was wondering if anybody could help me because i feel almost hopeless as i keep recreating the same type of situations in my life.

i am usually a somewhat outgoing and friendly person. everytime i start a new job or class i worry about whether other people will like me. sometimes i start obsessing over it and begin fearing people not liking me and ignoring me.
by doing this i believe i have made this situation happen several times in my life.

i recently started a new job and do not want this to happen again. could anybody please give me advice on how to change this? thank you so much!! -Lauren

[Guest]

Hi Lauren,

We all feel some anxiety in new situations, it is expected. Try to be yourself but take the time to listen to others. People likes people who pays attention to them. So instead of focusing on what others think of you, focus on what you can learn from them.

Hope it helps.

[Guest]

Thanks mcs...you are right I need to stop focusing so much on myself and more on others. That is my problem...I get anxious about something then start obsessing over it. I probably need to look more outward than I currently am. How do you learn to not care what others think though?

[Guest]

[Guest]

Hi Lauren, you remind me a lot of how i use to be when i was younger. please believe me when i tell you that if you trust and have faith in yourself, people will follow... be the leader and not the follower... you seem like a nice girl and nice girls are hard to find these day so value yourself and i assure you that others will value you!! another thing, if you are a good person and you do good in life, that's all you have to worry about, all else will follow...
so stop worrying about what people think of you and whether they like you or not.. just be yourself