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Learn how to comfort yourself, encourage yourself, and like yourself. This session is chock-full of POWERFUL tools for taking charge and changing your life for the better.
Guest

Post by Guest » Fri Aug 21, 2009 5:05 am

I see now how this works. And basically you are debunking your own labels. This is a great tool because you there really is no such thing as always or never. Any label can be torn down with this method.

Back to my second definition: someone who lacks common sense or ignores it.

We've all done that at one time or another. And whatever the reason, ignoring common sense doesn't make you stupid. It just means you've had a momentary lapse. Therefore I'm not stupid, just human.

Very helpful. Thanks Ninja!

RikkiC
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Sep 22, 2010 7:06 pm

Post by RikkiC » Fri Aug 21, 2009 5:55 am

New_Nana

Well in that case the person can be behaving in a mean way but not being mean themselves because it is not very realistic for someone to say or do things to embarass others 24-7.

I don't know anybody who has never tried to embarass others by saying or doing things. Wouldn't that make us all mean then?


As for your second post, I noticed you made a mistake and I'd just like to point out how I still think of you the same way i did before.

You're right any label can be torn down with this method that is if you can figure out what questions to ask. This method is not always simple but well worth it.

Ok so stupid is someone who lacks common sense or ignores it.

->What do you mean by common sense? What exactly is common sense?

To add to your response i believe we all have this common sense or at least to a certain extent and it may just be that it isn't something we were thinking of instead of purposely trying to ignore it. Course sometimes we do purposely ignore it but that isn't 27-4


Mike

Guest

Post by Guest » Fri Aug 21, 2009 6:11 am

My definition of stupid is - making the same mistake two and three times, and and not learning from it. I really hope you can de-bunk this one, because i still have a problem with it!!

Guest

Post by Guest » Fri Aug 21, 2009 7:05 am

liberal1964

a stupid person is someone who makes the same mistake 2 or 3 times, and doesn't learning from it.

->Do you always make mistakes 2-3 times and not learn a single thing from them with everything you do?


Mike

Guest

Post by Guest » Fri Aug 21, 2009 7:25 am

I made a mistake? OMG--WHERE!
Just kidding.

Common sense has a self-preservation quality to it. Don't walk out in traffic. Don't put your hand on a hot stove. These things are learned from experience, but some people don't possess common sense. So that's like what liberal1964 said about making the same mistake over and over and not learning from it.

What do you think?

Guest

Post by Guest » Fri Aug 21, 2009 8:20 am

New_Nana

What i think about that is are you the type of person to walk out on traffic or put your hand on a hot stove over and over and not learn from the experience?

I don't see many people who are constantly making the mistake of putting their hand on a stove and burning themselves...From my understanding really young children don't know the dangers of walking out in traffic and there are other things they don't know that might be considered common sense. Your definition would mean that a majority of young children would be stupid then.

We weren't born with common sense we had to learn and experience it so at some point in our lives we didn't possess it and it is hard to pay attention to what we don't know.

Not to mention if you didn't posess those self-preservation quality you probabbly would have accidentally died already because you would have done the act that was self-damaging.

Mike

Guest

Post by Guest » Fri Aug 21, 2009 10:45 am

Mike -

I now understand what you're looking for. In my original response, I didn't really know how to phrase my reply or what you wanted to see.

I often label myself as a failure. I would define a failure as someone who never achieves their goals.

What thoughts do you have on this?

Jamie

Guest

Post by Guest » Fri Aug 21, 2009 10:52 am

SeaRunner

I'd say you couldn't be a failure then because you have achieved some of your goals...when you were a toodler i'm sure walking was a goal for you. You also accomplish everyday goals which are simple like personal hygiene which you achieve this by showering, brushing your teeth...etc. Is it just that you aren't achieving certain goals that you'd like to achieve?

Mike

Guest

Post by Guest » Sun Aug 23, 2009 9:04 am

Hi Mike:
How are you?
Hope all is going well.

I label myself consistanly. When I think of something I might have done or said that hurt someone, or embarrased me badly, I usually tell myself "oh you stupid! How could you have done that?!" And I pray that God forgive me.
But later on I might feel like a 'stupid A. agian over something.
The truth is that I've made a lot of mistakes in my long life. When I think of someway that I failed my children way back when - well I might call myself something a lot worse than stupid.

It might be good to remember that we do as good as we know AT THE TIME.

We grow and learn all the time.
And when we know better , then we do better.

The most difficult job that we have is to forgive ourselves.
We are already forgiven. So perhaps we need to stop judging ourselves and be kinder to our pasts.

Anyway, this was a very good subject.

I hope you are feeling lots better now.

MaryJane

Guest

Post by Guest » Mon Aug 24, 2009 3:59 pm

hey Mike, Mary Jane and everyone else...btw, thanks for the heads-up about this thread Mike....

hmmmmmm....pretty deep thread....like everyone else, i've caught myself calling myself stupid here or there...not as often as before though...been working on being more compassionate and loving to myself...

i'm also curious as to how to breakdown Bill's (liberal 1964) label of outsider...i too (especially before the program) used to feel like an outsider, different or misunderstood by my family too...to be more specific - by my extended family.....pretty curious as to how we would break this down...

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