Bewilderment and Unreality

[Ashlee]

Does anyone else find this to be one of the worst/scariest parts of their disorder?
I can't quite explain it but my disorder (generalized anxiety and panic disorders) causes me to, at times, feel so "bewildered" and not in touch with myself and reality that I think I am going crazy. It is like I am experiencing different levels of consciousness that are disconnected. It is very existential! LOL
I can laugh at it when I don't feel it but in the moment, before or during an anxious episode or panic attack it is terrifying.
Intellectually I know that it is a response of my mind and body due to chemical reactions and to distract me from serious situations (like my mom having cancer etc) so I worry and obsess about the feeling and my anxiety instead.
But because I (like most of us) over-analyze and over-think this part of my disorder I almost try to convince myself or scare myself into thinking that it is more than an anxiety disorder. Again, I realize that this is what is in fact happening and that we all go through it but in the moment it is uncomfortable and scary. But positive self talk and the six step approach are working for it.
I just wanted to know if anyone else had similar thoughts/feeling about "bewilderment" or whatever you choose to call it - I haven't yet found a word that I think describes it!

[Guest]

Hi Ashlee,

It is called derealization/depersonalization and it is extremely common!! I think it is one of my worst symptoms--I actually feel as if I am watching myself in a movie and I feel really detached and almost lost in thinking about it. I start to question everything and I lose touch with reality--almost in a dream state. In the program, it says it is your minds way of protecting you from becoming so overloaded. I know this but I have a hard time putting it into practice. I read that once your anxity gets better that these thoughts go away. You are not alone, it is actually very common but very difficult to deal with!! Good luck!!

[Guest]

Isn't it fun? I was at church yesterday when it happened. Just having a conversation with a good friend when the "fog curtain" lowers. Nothing seems real, I am outside myself looking in, and everything is tinged with fear and terror. Ringing in the ears, floating kind of like a bloody cloud, watching a weird movie. Yeah. Good times.

I think you'll find if you read over the forums and hear the tapes that it is totally common. You just have to tell yourself to not be afraid of it. After all, we determine our reactions to these symptoms. If we stop reacting, they stop scaring us.

Good luck and God Bless.

[creamcheesepuff]

yes, I absolutely experienced that the other day at a wedding reception...it felt like I was sort of outside my body and needed to get out! What helped me was going to a quiet place (outside the reception on the patio) It made me "in control of the situation" this I know is not the answer but I did not leave and sort of floated through the situation instead of going home. I am hoping the program will help me not feel this way at all and I can actually fully engage in everyday normal activities.

[Guest]

I think I've experienced this a few times in years past. I felt like I was in like a dream state of some kind, like I wasn't in the moment, but like I was a step behind or something. Everything seemed not present I didn't know what was going on. And it was like I wasn't really feeling myself, like I wasn't feeling the present. Iwould start walking and realize I was walking, but it was like I wasn't really experiencing it normally. It felt like a dream, unreality. I believe I had this kind of experience 3 times in the past, but I thinkthey were all fairly spaced out and it was just those 3 times. I hope and believe that if you continue to work on yourself and your life, this strange, unpleasant experience will never be an issue again. Good Luck