positive? thinking

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Mar 15, 2009 2:17 pm

Hi Kelly,
First of all, you must recognize that you have an inner child. Your inner child is the part of yourself that holds the pain and emptiness.
Make sure to reach out to your inner child. Use your imagination to try and remember what you looked like when you were an abused child. Finding pictures of yourself at certain ages and setting them somewhere where you can look at them often might help to refresh your memory. Imagine yourself being kind to the inner child. Visualize doing loving things for her, such as giving toys that she always wanted...Clean her up and give her something which smells nice to wear...because many inner children think of themselves as dirty because they have shame from the abuse...Do fun things for your inner child. Take your inner child on an outing...just have fun with her...Make sure to tell your inner child how much you love her...Make sure to comfort her, and tell her that the abuse was not her fault...that she is indeed a very beautiful, talented, caring, adorable child...Remember, as you heal your inner child, you heal yourself...Accept your inner child as a part of yourself....Remember you are the adult you and are perfectly capable of taking excellent care of the inner child...Accept your inner child...know that she is a part of you...Okay..know that you left the inner child behind to avoid the terrible pain she held...As your inner-child begins to heal from the pain, you can then become one with her...Remember, as the adult you heals your inner child you are actually healing your deepest emotional wounds...Remember to try and be patient...and make sure to hold this inner child close to you...Hug her really tight, and tell her how special, loving and kind she is...Tell her all the things you would tell your own child if he/she felt unloved...Tell her she is worthy of love...That she is safe, and that you will take excellent care of her...Let her know that the adult you is on this journey with her...and, that she will never ever be alone...make sure to let her know that she is safe now...and that adult you will always be there for her...This requires practice, practice, and more practice...
Remember the more we practice something...the better we get at it...May God Bless You On Your Journey To Recovery....

Jess2005 · Post by **Jess2005** » Sun Mar 15, 2009 5:09 pm

Ms. T Bones,
Bless your heart I almost cried after reading your posting-you are so anointed and I do believe God has called you to help other people who are suffering. I know I need to love myself and that I will never find that love from others (which I've been trying to do almost my entire life). My husband has basically told me to snap out of it or we are finished. I felt so rejected when he told me that, but I can imagine he must feel helpless because he can't fix me-at least that's what my counselof tells me. I have mixed emotions about it-one minute I feel like I hate him for not being supportive and understanding and the next day I feel he is the best thing that ever happened to me. I'm so tired of depression-I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. But, I know I have got to fight it and I also believe that people who suffer from depression are the STRONGEST people in the world for not giving up and continuing to live. I hope one day God will use me to help others the way he is using you. Thank you so much! God Bless You! Kelly

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 4:28 am

Dearest Kelly,
I truly believe that helping others is my mission in this life, also...I am so thankful to be able to help you in any way that I can...Kelly you might consider writing yourself another love letter...the kind you would write to a child of friend whom you love dearly...At one point in my life I felt that I had lost my identity...I wrote myself compassionate love letters because I needed to find out who I really was...By doing so, I found out that I was a really loving compassionate caring person...I give God all the credit for this...You may want to begin your letter with Dear Kelly...and go from there...I just wished I could do more...Recovery takes times...The more you practice something, the better you get at it...I am so proud of you for facing these issues head on...You are much stronger than you realize...Keep on the good work...be patient...you will succeed

familyman6-Nick · Post by **familyman6-Nick** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 5:25 am

Hi,
I just started the program, and can relate to all here. I have suffered from depression for so long I am not sure how long I have had it. I feel like the last 8 years or so have been a blur, and I have missed so much. Ms. T Bones, I love reading your posts, they give me hope.

j_lamo7 · Post by **j_lamo7** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 12:00 pm

Dear Alg35,
I am grateful that I have given you hope...Life can be tough, and throw us some really tough blows...Make it your first priority to do the program, and don't believe those negative thoughts which tell you that you are wasting your time...Depression is really hard, but, always remember, that there is a light at the end of the tunnel...So, hold up your head, and do the program...You are worth the effort!!! God Bless!!!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Mar 17, 2009 3:55 pm

Last thursday I found out I was losing my position at work to a teller who has only been with the bank for about 1 year. I have been there for 13 1/2 years. I was teller supervisor for 6 years. Not only did I lose my position, but they made me a floating teller between my office and another one. I feel depressed, betrayed, and unwanted. I went into work today after 3 days off, and I felt like an outcast. My work was given to Ashley, and I was barely spoken to. Ashley is a friend of mine, and I feel there is tension between us now because of all of this. I'm actually looking forward to going to the other office, even though I'm scared and anxious about it, just to get away from the tensions in my office now. I almost had an emotional breakdown in the two days following the news. I'm doing better at the moment, but I definitely need help to stay in the right direction. Any advice anyone can give me would be greatly appreciated since I'm not comfortable being in either office right now.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Mar 17, 2009 8:27 pm

I can relate to having problems at work. I recently started a job at a hotel and I told Kay(the supervisor who is 60years young)about my depression and found out she had suffered from it severely about 10 years ago and that her daughter is suffering from it now-so I felt better. Then, a couple nights later, I was working with a pompous person and I was listening to the Anxiety/Depression cd 2 and somehow I started talking about how I was going through depression and she says to me "I don't BELIEVE in depression-people need to GET OVER IT! It's their fault they are depressed! There's no reason in the world to be depressed!" Well, that really upset me as I cannot tolerate such ignorance so we basically "had it out"! Come to find out-she is the General Manager, Susie's and the supervisor Kay's "FAVORITE"! GREAT! So, here I am now thinking I'm going to lose my job, they're going to cut my hours, they're all talking about me,,,,etc... I don't know why I ever opened my mouth about depression-maybe for support, but now I feel so inferior to these people-like I did something wrong and I am worried now! I spent the last six years working for a company here that totally treated me like I was an embecile and I finally got so stressed out and depressed about it-I gave my two-weeks notice-then, I was off work for almost two months and I nearly lost my mind and sank further into depression!!! I finally find this hotel job and now I'm in this crazy predicament! What is wrong with me?????

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Mar 18, 2009 7:05 pm

Kelly...there is absolutely nothing wrong with you...I bet this lady suffers from depression herself, and that is probably why she became so defensive....It was a sore topic for her, or at least that is the way it sounds to me...Your supervisor is being totally insensitive to make any smart remark at all...I just believe she suffers from it too, and is trying to hide it...
Maybe, you did over-react a little, but who wouldn't on such a sensitive topic??? Remember, we are sensitive people...Give yourself a break...These are the ones with the problem, not you...When you get to the part of the program that talks about under-reacting, you will learn better how to deal with these kind of folks....I am soooo sorry that this happened to you, and I pray that you don't lose your job over something that silly...and, you are not inferior to anyone...No-one is any better than anyone else...And, I guarantee you, that if anything you have better principles...Try and focus on the program, and not worry...May God Bless You In Every Area Of Your Life...You deserve it...

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Mar 18, 2009 7:20 pm

Ms. T Bones,
I was so happy to see you had responded to my posting tonight! I stayed up all night Tuesday into Wednesday morning and I realized that I had been on a familiar path-worry and obsessive negative thinking-I even had a panic attack but I listened to the relaxation CD and then I did the dishes and laundry and I got through it without Klonopin.

I also realized that I didn't get in the shape I'm in overnight so I am not going to change overnight (unless God miraculously delivers me) and that it is going to take work and practice practice practice to become a positive thinker and worry free. So, I gave myself a break-and it felt GOOD. This program IS working for me-I just had to really open my mind and give it a chance-my hope is to be as inspirational to others as you are, Ms. T Bones. You are truly a gift from God and I treasure every response I get from you. I will be up all night again, as I work the midnight shift at the hotel I work at-yes, I get lonely, but I am learning how to like being with me. One day at a time, one minute at a time, one second at a time! I AM GOING TO COME OUT OF THIS WITH TWICE THE JOY, TWICE THE PEACE, AND TWICE THE BLESSING! ( A quote from Joel Osteen's book Become A Better You) Blessings, Kelly

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Mar 18, 2009 7:45 pm

Dearest Kelly...It made me feel so warm on the inside to read that you are doing so well...
I am sooooo proud of your accomplishments...
You are very strong and courageous....
Thanks so much for the compliment...I am sure you will be a great inspiration for others whom have suffered as you have!!!!! I am so happy for you

...God Bless