Need Support
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Candice.Thomas
- Posts: 3
- Joined: Wed Feb 04, 2009 5:51 pm
I have been with my boyfriend for almost 5 years now. We have been having problems lately because he is never there for me when I need him. I don't know if I am acting too clingy because of my depression. He knows that I am going through a lot and that I am going through the program. I could be feeling good about life and he just has this way of tearing me down. No one else hurts me the way that he can. I know that this all sounds like an easy fix because I should just break up with him but I do love him and I wanted to try to make it work but I just don't know if it is possible. I have been praying about it for almost a year and nothing seems to be getting better, in fact, it seems to be getting worse. What should I do? Is God giving me a sign? I want to be in His will and do what He wants me to do. I just don't know what that is?
Last edited by Candice.Thomas on Mon Feb 23, 2009 3:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I sought the Lord, He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears. Psalm 34:4
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Guest
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Guest
Hi Candice,
That is a sweet name
I am a sugar eating fool and addict. What can I say, I love the stuff and I know it is bad for me, so don't no one tell what I already know, please
I remember when you first visited and how worried you were. I also remember that you mentioned your boy friend and this problem seemed to be part of your worry too.
I know it seems, at times like the end of the world to you, if this guy slips through your hands, but trust me, you need to feel good about yourself and work on making you happy first. I am not saying that you should be selfish. I am saying that you need to look for, get and maintain joy in your heart and life. You will never be able to hold on to a man who himself may be fearful of with some one that is sad all the time. I have put up, on what is basically suggestions on motivational self cheering. You can find it on the 6th paragraph of this thread:
http://bbs.stresscenter.com/ev...001072246#1001072246
I am not saying to give up on your relationship, but simply that I think your relationship will get better as you get better at handling your depression and using the tools in this program, and well as information that many of us can give.
You have so many things going for you. You are smart, very attractive, and a very strong person that knows how to get things done when you set you mind on doing something you generally accomplish it. So why are you letting letting yourself down. You need more laughter and joy in your life and I find a lot of it on the comedy channel. For example:
Yesterday, it seemed like I was laughing at myself. Keep in mind, I was having a really bad morning. I switched on the comedy channel for a few minutes, and Mad TV was on.
They had on a skit about an elderly couple, as broken down as I am, walking or should I say shuffling, out of the super market. Kinda like I walk, and a young couple were moved with compassion to try to help them with their groceries. That's when the funny stuff happened. The old couple didn't want their help and a struggle ensues, or what looks like a struggle, in the parking lot, because the old couple thought they were being mugged for their groceries. It was too funny. I was laughing as I was writing this.
What is funny, is that while I am shopping I have to use the little electric ride along shopping cart, I am sure you've seen them, and they always ask me if I need help, and I say no. So the skit reminds me me a little of me. But, you get the picture.
Look for some humor in life no matter where you find it. The key is, you will find it. When you do, it will put a smile on your face and laughter in your heart to replace the pain and sadness. Positive thoughts and feeling have a difficult time co-existing, and I think you already know that or may soon learn that. When did I break you up?
As far as to whether or not you and your boyfriend are breaking up, change those thoughts. You are projecting something that has not happened and have put yourself on the hamster wheel of the anxiety and depression circular grind.
Tell yourself to stop this projecting about what may or may not happen and stop all the negative thinking. Instead, divert your attention and thoughts to the opposite thoughts.
For example: My boyfriend is a good man, he loves me but just doesn't understand or is frustrated because he doesn't know how to help me beat this. Hey that is what we are here for. To help you beat this thing regardless of whether he understands or not. You have us! I may not be here all the time, but you have me.
I'll be the first to admit, I am ugly as sin, but I have a big heart, and I love looking at your picture. Hey, I may be old, and broken down, but I can still enjoy looking at the menu >:) Opps, the devil made me say that.
Believe me. gray skies are going to clear up, the sun will come out tomorrow, and years from now, this will all be a memory. Love yourself enough to continue to learn how to wage the battles and win the war! Don't you deserve that?
That is a sweet name
I am a sugar eating fool and addict. What can I say, I love the stuff and I know it is bad for me, so don't no one tell what I already know, please I remember when you first visited and how worried you were. I also remember that you mentioned your boy friend and this problem seemed to be part of your worry too.
I know it seems, at times like the end of the world to you, if this guy slips through your hands, but trust me, you need to feel good about yourself and work on making you happy first. I am not saying that you should be selfish. I am saying that you need to look for, get and maintain joy in your heart and life. You will never be able to hold on to a man who himself may be fearful of with some one that is sad all the time. I have put up, on what is basically suggestions on motivational self cheering. You can find it on the 6th paragraph of this thread:
http://bbs.stresscenter.com/ev...001072246#1001072246
I am not saying to give up on your relationship, but simply that I think your relationship will get better as you get better at handling your depression and using the tools in this program, and well as information that many of us can give.
You have so many things going for you. You are smart, very attractive, and a very strong person that knows how to get things done when you set you mind on doing something you generally accomplish it. So why are you letting letting yourself down. You need more laughter and joy in your life and I find a lot of it on the comedy channel. For example:
Yesterday, it seemed like I was laughing at myself. Keep in mind, I was having a really bad morning. I switched on the comedy channel for a few minutes, and Mad TV was on.
They had on a skit about an elderly couple, as broken down as I am, walking or should I say shuffling, out of the super market. Kinda like I walk, and a young couple were moved with compassion to try to help them with their groceries. That's when the funny stuff happened. The old couple didn't want their help and a struggle ensues, or what looks like a struggle, in the parking lot, because the old couple thought they were being mugged for their groceries. It was too funny. I was laughing as I was writing this.
What is funny, is that while I am shopping I have to use the little electric ride along shopping cart, I am sure you've seen them, and they always ask me if I need help, and I say no. So the skit reminds me me a little of me. But, you get the picture.
Look for some humor in life no matter where you find it. The key is, you will find it. When you do, it will put a smile on your face and laughter in your heart to replace the pain and sadness. Positive thoughts and feeling have a difficult time co-existing, and I think you already know that or may soon learn that. When did I break you up?
As far as to whether or not you and your boyfriend are breaking up, change those thoughts. You are projecting something that has not happened and have put yourself on the hamster wheel of the anxiety and depression circular grind.
Tell yourself to stop this projecting about what may or may not happen and stop all the negative thinking. Instead, divert your attention and thoughts to the opposite thoughts.
For example: My boyfriend is a good man, he loves me but just doesn't understand or is frustrated because he doesn't know how to help me beat this. Hey that is what we are here for. To help you beat this thing regardless of whether he understands or not. You have us! I may not be here all the time, but you have me.
I'll be the first to admit, I am ugly as sin, but I have a big heart, and I love looking at your picture.
Hey, I may be old, and broken down, but I can still enjoy looking at the menu >:) Opps, the devil made me say that. Believe me. gray skies are going to clear up, the sun will come out tomorrow, and years from now, this will all be a memory. Love yourself enough to continue to learn how to wage the battles and win the war! Don't you deserve that?