AM I GOING CRAZY!!!!!

Manley · Post by **Manley** » Sun Feb 01, 2009 5:21 am

k guys i need to know whats going on with me, i've recently haven't been sleeping well in the mornings and this morning felt like no other. it was like i was hearing everything in my head, my thoughts, my dreams, and it was like i was hearing screams and people talking. i'm scared right now. can anyone relate or am i going crazy

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Feb 01, 2009 6:11 am

Hi Manley,

So you say that you typically haven't been sleeping well lately, and that this morning it just kinda went up tenfold?

I don't sleep well often myself, and it is common to me that I would have some mornings when I'd awake that things were already seeming to spiral downhill. I'd wake up with a panic attack already starting the second my eyes opened.

I can't say exactly what it is for you that is causing it, but sleeping inconsistently lately could have a lot to do with it. I'm trying to look into natural things I can take or do to help me sleep better also. Have you ever tried melatonin? I tried it many years ago, but can't recall the effect it had.

There is one thing I am absolutely certain of though, and that is that you are DEFINITELY not going crazy. I know it may feel that way, but that is just the build up of anxiety and racing thoughts that would be causing that. I still have moments on occasion where I think I might go crazy, but in reality that isn't going to happen.

By the way, did you start the program, if so what session are you currently on?

Peace & Love
-Dustin

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Feb 01, 2009 6:12 am

its not like i'm having a conversation with someone its like i'm remembering noises and hearing them when i'm half asleep. i don't know how to explain this. its like non stop talking and just think of someone saying "YES" out loud. thats what i hear or in my head atleast. it just feels like its more than anxiety. can someone relate or am i truly alone on this one and maybe my worst fear came true that i'm becoming a skitsophrenic

Marybc · Post by **Marybc** » Sun Feb 01, 2009 6:25 am

I've had that before. In fact I had it when I was trying to go to sleep a few nights ago. I'm fairly certain it's just anxiety, although when it happens it FEELS LIKE I'm going crazy.

I've had it happen several times, and haven't gone off the deep end yet!

I started journaling and writing down some of the thoughts and that helped. Sometimes I think your mind is trying to think through and resolve too much at once. If you start to write it down that requires your brain to focus on one thing at a time and for me it sort of gets my mind settled on one "channel" instead of feeling like someone is flipping channels on a radio!

cjobasan · Post by **cjobasan** » Sun Feb 01, 2009 6:28 am

what exactly do you get? did u read both my posts? cuz im talking to my wife right now and i'm so scared thats its more than anxiety

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Feb 01, 2009 7:05 am

It's like it sounds like I'm in a busy restaurant and hear all these people talking. Then I might hear a piece of music, then I just feel like I can hear my thoughts. It goes on and on. . .usually only when my eyes are closed though.

When it happened Friday night I tried to watch TV but couldn't focus. Then I tried reading my Bible, but I couldn't focus. Then I got out my journal and I was going to start writing but I couldn't focus. So, then I started reading what I'd written in the past year, and it started to make sense and help me remember that I've had it happen before and I'm fine.

The last time I remember that happening was this summer at the pool. I got overheated and I was starting to doze off and my mind started doing that and I couldn't seem to wake up all the way. It was like I was half awake half asleep and I was hearing my subconscious.

I've been to a psychiatrist and a psychologist and I've talked about this stuff. They both assure me it's not schizophrenia or bi-polar, it's just anxiety.

Those other disorders have plenty of other symptoms other than racing thoughts.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Feb 01, 2009 9:19 am

Manley, I get the same thing when my anxiety is in "over-drive". I'll be like in the shower or trying to fall asleep and I'll be obsessing or worrying and I get these scary drive-by thoughts that seem totally random. Sometimes I'll think I hear a word or a phrase like as if it came from a tv or radio in the background. It can be really scary, so I understand. I know I'm not hearing these things out in the room, it's like the volume in the back of my mind got turned up for a sec. I can't stand it. The thing is, I only get it when I'm extremely anxious, or just simply overtired and stressed. I've seen a psychiatrist, physician, neurologist, spiritual councelor, and they all have told me that it's anxiety. Ugh. But my fear is that I'm going to "develope" this new mental illness of some sort, so my fear comes back sometimes. I've just started this program again (a few months ago i made it through to session 5 and felt so good that i stopped...after the holidays my anxiety started coming back with my 'winter blues'). I'm hoping that I can regain faith in myself and to finally accept that there's nothing wrong with me and to stop thinking that I could lose my mind. I know this program has potential to heal me, I just have to follow through. I know that the problem is "within" me, and nothing else can help but shifting the way I think. To be optimistic, I think that once people like us can master our minds there will be no challenge that we wont be able to handle.

CrimsonFox · Post by **CrimsonFox** » Sun Feb 01, 2009 9:30 am

I've had times where I'll hear a music recording or lyric repeat in my head over and over again as clear as if someone had a turntable playing right next to me. Or, sometimes I'll lay in bed at night thinking non-stop about something upsetting me and it seems almost involuntary. I've even found myself so lost in the voices or what have you that someone would say something to me and it was like I 'checked out' mentally for a few moments. I've awakened after a particularly lucid dream hearing laughter and it stays with me after I've awakened.

An overactive brain that is anxious will experience things like this. So, don't allow yourself to be disturbed with it. Maybe there are things going on in your life that you want to distract yourself from. Or maybe there are issues that you want to escape from or don't want to face. I see this as a way the mind kind of clears itself out because of all the overactivity going on. It's a sign to slow down and let go of things you can't control.

I don't think you're going schizophrenic- many people with anxiety fear they're going crazy and that isn't so. Don't fight it or develop new fears over this. Allow it to just happen and practice your 6 steps. Get busy doing other things and simply notice the voices, screams, music or whatever- it isn't anything significant and just the minds way of dealing with too much input. Give it time and this will go away and become less important to you.

bobsdiane · Post by **bobsdiane** » Sun Feb 01, 2009 9:40 am

Falling asleep or waking from sleep seems to be the most common time for this. Sparkus, you talk about hearing laughter that stays after you've awakened. I've even had visual hallucinations upon waking or dozing off. I went to a psychiatrist for it because I was sure this really was a sign of impending insanity. She explained exactly what it was and that helped me feel better about it. I had this happen a few days ago. I'll be dozing off on the couch and then open my eyes and will think I see someone in the room looking at me. It doesn't scare me as much as it used to because I know now to ignor anything that I see right as I'm waking up. One of these days someone really will be in the room and I'm going to think it's just my imagination. LOL

Our minds really can play tricks on us, but the less importance we give to it, the less often it happens.

hopehound · Post by **hopehound** » Sun Feb 01, 2009 10:23 am

Hi, Manley, I've read many of your posts. I can identify with alot of them. Only a professional can diagnose you for sure, but if I were you, I would just see someone to make sure it's not any form of bipolar. You can have anxiety, and panic attacks, and still be bipolar. If you are , don't worry. there are many drug choices out there, and this program can still help you alot. If it turns out that it's just anxiety etc. then keep on pluggin on, and work the program. Panic attacks, and anxiety can be really, really scary, but the more knowledge you have, and the more you utilize the tools of this program, the better you can get. I hope things get better for you soon.
Hally