Talk myself into anxiousness

[LyndaLu]

Since I have retired and don't get out much I find it difficult to interact with people. A trip to the grocery store makes me anxious and wondering if I can get through the checkout without saying something stupid or fumbling for my cash or card. I think I must get out more. Then it should get easier..........maybe????

I have been unemployed for three years and my condition is just getting worse and worse from

being at home all of the time and having nothing to do and nowhere to go.

I have become more agoraphobic than ever, only leaving my apartment when I really need to.

I used to have my groceries delivered ! That is how I avoided the grocery store !

I now go into the grocery store to do my shopping. Take it from someone who knows what it is

like to be in their apartment all of the time......you have GOT to get out of the house and talk

with people or just be around people. The longer you stay at home the more content you become

with being inside all alone, and that is just where we don't want to be.

My greatest accomplishments are the small ones......grocery shopping, hair cut, laundry, drugstore,

going to visit my mom on the weekends, taking my mom on her errands, taking out my trash every

day and checking my mailbox every day and driving my vehicle.

YOU CAN DO IT. Stay strong and take little baby steps and you will be on your way. DON'T GIVE UP.

Lynda

[dhoyt84]

I have been doing really well compared to where I started. I'm beginning session 5 on Monday. I hope someone out there can relate to what is going on with me. I have a week where I will 100% fine, then usually a day when I feel fragile, like I'm not in control and it makes me scared because my mind starts racing. I can still function but throughout the day I'm like arguing with myself in my head. Sometimes I get anxious but no body symptoms occur. I have been trying to live day to day for the first time, because I'm a planner and like to know the future somewhat. Therefore now when I think about the future I get scared. Then I get depressed. I want everyday to be a good day and I know it can be, but why are some days so good and other days I feel like I'm ready to burst but I try to hide it because I have put my family through enough. I don't want them to worry about me or think I'm going to end up in the psych hospital again. Because reality is I know the techniques and my mind is in a better place overall. I think I'm still afraid of panic attacks and being anxious some days even though I know how to get myself out of it. I guess the real questions is how do we become unafraid of them at all times.?? Any suggestions...
Thanks everyone!

[hopeful12]

Lucy,

Yes, the more you do it, the easier it is. I used to be afraid of getting a haircut because I didn't know how I could sit in the chair and make small talk. What if I felt panicky and I jumped out of the chair? What if I had a stomachache and had to run for the bathroom. After doing this program, and continuing to go to the salon. I distract myself by making small talk. Now, I don't have any anticipation issues. Even if I think "what if" before a hair cut, I will just tell myself, oh yeah, that's just my old habit of "what if" or that's just a reminder symptom, I don't need to dwell on that. I am fine.

Going to the grocery store more often will definitely help. Start by going for something small. Plan were your keys and wallet will be. Give yourself something to say to the cashier -- maybe not right away but at one of your planned practices. Go at a slow time of the day if that helps. Good luck and let us know how you do after your next trip!

[hopeful12]

Hi dhoyt,

To answer your question, yes, it is totally normal to have good and bad days! I am pretty sure that Lucinda says recovery can be two steps forward and one day back. Some days things are just easier because of our environment or how much sleep we have etc. And, then somed days are harder. Because you have the skills, you will never go back to where you started -- even though you may find your body and mind try to test this to prove it wrong. You can feel lousy for a whole day or a whole week if you scare yourself into it, but remember it is your thoughts that are scaring you. So, if you have a bad day and have symptoms of anxiety just tell yourself, yup, there I go again. It's completely normal, so I am going to just take care of myself today and go back to the basics -- listen to a tape, do the relaxation session, get busy with something, volunteer, get moving -- once that cortisol is released when we have a scary thought, it will need to work its way out of our system. Hope this is helpful to you. You will be fine.

[LyndaLu]

I want everyday to be a good day and I know it can be, but why are some days so good and other days I feel like I'm ready to burst but I try to hide it because I have put my family through enough. I don't want them to worry about me or think I'm going to end up in the psych hospital again. !

I know what you are talking about, I have also been to the psych hospital.

Stay Strong and God Bless,
Lynda