New To Program

[faith4]

Wow, what a great support group we have here. Thank You Katlyn for responding back and letting me know you are doing ok, you've been on my mind and in my prayers. As I read through the posts everyone has such a positive attitude which gives me the inititive to continue on with the program, and just life is so busy for us, and being the perfectionist that we are, makes it hard to to fit everything we should be doing as the program said. If anyone has some suggestions on easy meditation, please let me know. Mindfulness is something I just can't seem to do. I can't keep my brain still. I do the relaxation cd, exercise, journal when I can........but meditation.....I need some insight on please. How long does it take to train the brain to stay still and keep the brain from thinking on what I should be doing.

[tina martin]

My sleep/wake hours are considered disordered. I don't care. Am in at 8, up between 4 and 5. In the a.m. I try to fit in yoga, tai chi, treadmill, meditation. Can't always get all of it in. That's fine. With young children it's much harder, of course. You do what you can reasonably. Now I've been at this for years so please don't let what I do overwhelm you. One thing at a time.

The program has a CD for relaxation, so that can be a good start. Or, simply sit quietly, undisturbed, close your eyes, and slowly breath in (nose) and breathe out (mouth). The idea is to keep your mind as still as possible. The mind will wander, but we try to bring it back to stillness. We can create images or mantras, or count about 6 in and 7 out. I am trying to summarize what is taken up in many, many books and CD's. Yet I'm trying to present it in a few sentences. How ridiculous is that? Never mind. It's a start. It can be as little as 5 minutes at the outset with a goal of about 15 minutes, once a day or twice a day. I sit twice a day.

There is so much to discover and learn. It is all wonderful.

[Iwillbebetter]

Faith, Yes it can be VERY hard to fit everything is. I think a big thing is to do what you can, and know you did your best even if you didn't get "everything" done. I also have A LOT of trouble with the relaxation CD or any type of relaxation for that reason. I remember as a young child (Even gradeschool years) So many nights I ended up crying myself to sleep. As I would lay for bed my mind would just start racing and racing which kept me awake.... after trying many different things all which failed I would be so frustrated I would just start crying.
I figure just keep trying different things.... between trying different things and persistency somethings gotta give sooner or later. I did recently get a book from the library, about meditation for stress. I haven't gotten far, but the 1st "excersice" it has you do is to just focus on breathing. Even just for a few minutes but that helps by keeping your mind focused on breathing instead of the other thoughts that can come in.

** Tina - thanks for the imput. I have tried the relaxation CD that came with program but I just have so much trouble "focusing" on what she says to do. I will just keep trying different things and keep practicing. I did get a book when I was at the library and it also mentions the focusing on breathing. I tried that for about 5 minutes and although I did have other thoughts come in.... my mind was clearer than it has ever been!! So that's a great start. I will just keep on it. I was a little skeptical at the book for meditation wasn't sure if a book could help, but then I thought well why not?? I think I will also try to get some of those CD that are like ocean waves, or birds chirping. I think for now I will start with just 5 minutes here and there and then as I get better I can plan for longer times... 5 minutes is hard enough at this point

Ahhh well time to get ready for work Will check back before bed tonight. I hope everyone has a wonderous day!!!

[faith4]

Thanks for getting back to me, I will try just 5 minutes and just focus on the breathing. I think u guys are right. Baby steps. Gosh it just seems that people with an anxiety disorder have such a full plate and putting more chores on the list can get the thoughts racing to meet my deadlines as, and then frustration when I don't get everything done. The cd is pretty good it is hard to stay in sync (I know I don't have to, but want to do it right) on the breathing cause of the talking Lucinda does in b/w the counts of the breath. So I will give this a try. Thanks so much!

[Iwillbebetter]

Faith I know exactly what you mean. I was having a lot of trouble with the CD and now that you say that, I think that's it. I was trying to be sure to do it "just right". I was having trouble with her breathing to, and I remember her mentioning people having trouble with it, and that just made it get worse
I have had a little more luck with that focusing on my breathing. So I think I'll check that book out a little more and see what other "excersizes" it will have. I'll keep you updated with them if you'd like.
It's funny that you say that about the full plate and getting everything done.... I was just thinking this morning, before coming on here how frustrated I was. I have been trying to adjust my schedule so I can get up before my household and have a little "me time" before the day starts. At first I was doing great. But the past few days I've been to bed late so I've been sleeping in. So this morning I was starting the usual "beat myself up for not doing it" (luckily I started session 3 yesterday - posistive self-talk) So I implimented it. I said wait a minute now. You did do it for a few days. That's a few days more than before, so what if it didn't work out for me the last few days, just keep it up and you'll get it down. Things are bound to come up here and there to "get in the way" it's time to start re-acting to those things differently. Not to let them "get us" it's ok if we don't get it all done. Or if we don't do it just right. That's why we are here. We are learning and will continue to learn!!!

anyway hope all is well hope the breathing works a little better for you

[tina martin]

Yes, go with the flow and do not beat yourself up. Meditation is not easy, but it can be learned and acquired as a habit. I am not Buddhist but did go to meditate with them, only once. It was a start: just sit cross legged, eyes closed, in silence. Some people like being talked to or hearing soothing music; others prefer silence. There is yoga nidra where someone speaks to you to help you. There is TM (Transcendental Meditation) where you get a teacher, but it is costly. Besides breathing and counting I sometimes imagine myself floating in water, or floating in space on a magic carpet toward a big, bright star. Sometimes I imagine sitting outdoors under a tree or in a cove amidst trees or flowers with nice scents.

It is a great adventure to learn to meditate. The big thing is to keep at it. It takes experimentation, patience, and persistence. Also, the rewards are gradual and cumulative. Try not to give up.

[Iwillbebetter]

Tina,
I think that is the big thing for me with the meditation is remembering not to give up, and not beating myself up. Sometimes it can be so easy to get discouraged and "give up" but I am using the skills I'm learning to keep at it! and I will. Sooner or later I will learn. I will just keep experimenting like you said to find exactly what works for me! I love your idea's of envisioning yourself in those places. I hope to someday be able to do that. I have never been able to "visualize" in my head. Another thing that has frustrated me over the years but I'm sure the better I get and "controlling my head" the better I will get at those types of things
I am interested in the Yoga also. Don't want to start to much at once though. I was looking in our community flyer thing and saw just a beginners Yoga class that's just 2 days in January. I think I might do that. I think meditation I'm better doing on my own without the talking, I think Yoga would be better to learn with someone talking.... I think the class would also be great for me, as that's something the anxiety has kept be from. The social aspects. I've become a bit of a "loner" these days and want to be able to get out on my own and do something with others.
Hearing you does give me hope. I use to "dread" relaxation. I knew it was something I just "couldn't" do. Now I am getting excited to learn and eventually "master" (but remembering it will be sometime before I am anywhere close to "mastery"

[tina martin]

Agree with all you say here. Remember, I've been at it for years and my children are grown up and gone. For sure, not too much all at once. Together we will reprogram the mind. It can be done. Our brain is plastic and, in fact, wants us to be well. We must develop patience. Our culture militates against it. Patience is the key word.

Give your children a big hug and enjoy your day.

[Iwillbebetter]

Our brain is plastic and, in fact, wants us to be well

I love the way you word this so true. And yes patience is a key peice!!
(kids have been hugged!! ) now to enjoy the day!!

* Have a great day *

[tina martin]

Just a little hello to you and kiddies. You know I used to teach preschool, 3 year olds and 4 year olds. So I easily get nostalgic.

For breathing during meditation you can think Calm as you breathe in and Peace as you breathe out. Sometimes works for me. Happy Sunday.