RELAPSE!!!

[bthnown]

From the outside, people assume that my life is grand. I have an amazing child, graduated college and just recently opened my own business. You would think that with such wonderful things in my life that I would be happy, but I am FULL of anxiety and panic... again!

The "freedom" of working from home has defintely given my mind too much freedon- I have horrible racing thoughts which then lead to physical symptoms which then leads to panic attacks. I cry and feel hopeless that this trembling and constant worrying about going crazy is going to materialize.

Why does this "relapse" hit so hard and hurt so much? I just want to be able to smile for genuine purposes instead to cover up the obsessive, scary, anxious thoughts going on in my head. I want to be free of this panic!

Any words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated!

Beth

[pjmorales]

Hi Beth, im sorry you are going through this, and i dont have any words of wisdom because im going through a relapse myself. Im miserable and i think the physical symptoms are worse this time, idk. But just know you are not alone and im praying, praying every day for me and for all of you out there that are suffering with this aweful thing that i wouldnt wish on my worst enemy. I hope you get better soon!!

[johnny77]

Hello, I too have been suffering with an anxiety and deppression relapse. A far as the anxiety goes, I used to have it REAL BAD. I went through the program in the late 90's and it worked a miracle in me! For years I rarely had anxiety attacks or panik attacks and if I did it was easily manageable. Last year in September my deppression and anxiety came crashing on me like a tidal wave and know I'm having moderate anxiety and anxiety attacks again. It's scarey, it's like i'm going through it all over again ready to rush to the ER like I used to. Some of the same old symptoms and even some new ones.

I think possibly the relapse happens because the underlying stress we have just builds up on us and then just bursts into a furry. i think we have alot of worry and anticipatory anxeity at least I know I do.

Whatever are reason for having this relapse we should use the skills in the program and go through it again as a refresher. For me, I have neglected the tools I learned years ago and maybe thats part of the problem that contributed to this happening to me again. These are lifelong skill that should be practiced daily. I do know that i have been glancing at my old workbook and refreshing the program skills and now using this forum to communicate with others and I know I am not alone in this and we can get through this. ive been motivated to keep a journal again and track my thoughts and anxious times and start looking for patterns in thinking so I can pinpoint what sets me up for anxiety. I also have some stressfull stuff going on which is a valid reason to cause anxiety so i am dealing with those in the most healthy way. Making a plan of action to conquer what drives my anxiety.

Basically i feel like someone who used to be an expert at using rolloarskates. They have been in the closet getting dusty and rusty. Now I'm dusting them off and learning how to use them again. Legs wobbly but I'm able to keep myself up. I just have to have faith that I will learn to use these again and have a smoother experiance. I also am a man of faith, and know that I can do all things in Christ who strenthens me. I know Im not alone in this and I believe there is something to learn from all this. it's helpfull to hear others stories and share mine. I find it theraputic. We can help eachother by just posting are experiance's and learning from each other.

[Paisleegreen]

Hi Johnny77 I'm glad to hear from you and know that I and others aren't alone in this. I'm glad to hear that you were successful with the program as well. I've been through it once, but not with the workbook. I only had the CDs, but have used Dr David Burns 10 Steps to Self Esteem which is really good and helped me.

I've been keeping myself busy since it is summer and there is time for some fun and also yardwork, which sometimes gives me anxiety and other times joy. I just need to not overdo it. Hope to see you on the other threads. Paislee

[bthnown]

Thanks for the support! It is very much appreciated. I am feeling a bit anxious again today, but hope it fades as the day goes on.

[budman254]

Hang in there everyone! Add me to the relapse list. I've gone almost 20 years since the help of a similar program with only a few bumps along the way- up until about 2 months ago. I'm pretty confident this program is way better than the last I went through. Just takes some time and effort on all our parts

[Polaris]

I can relate, after many years I am back to going through the cds again. Life sure can be tough!