Hospitals

[Wildcard]

Man'o

I have been reading a really great book by Anthony Robbins that if you have a chance you should find it. Its called the "unlimited power within".... I think. Its his first book writen back in like 86. It really shows you different ways of looking at things and may be a great help. It has helped me in ways I can't describe and I dont have the HUGE stress you have right now.


Im sorry for this, but THH posted a wonderful video by the Eagles and that got me thinking about a song that really puts me in a good mood. Keep in mind it is very annoying and well, catchy. So i have to do this, its kind of my friday song here at work. Again IM SORRY!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E_v468ptuXw

[CarolM]

Yeah i can definitely relate. Just this morning my mom was sent the the emergency room from her assisted living home now she's going to a different hospital tonight. She has Alzheimers and we are worried she may have had a mini stroke... Right now i have a lump in my throat. I'm beside myself about her and on top of that i'm panicing about how to deal with all this and driving to and going in the hospital. I'm trying to "act" ok but inside i'm a mess. My mind is jumping back and forth from worrying about my mom to worrying about panicing. I"m sorry i should be writing something to help you but i'm going on about my problem. I guess i just want to say your not alone and i completely understand how you feel. ((hugs))

[manofmusic]

On Thursday, I got a call at work from the hospital. She said to come to the hospital, your dad's on 100% oxygen and his levels are dropping. I was surprisingly calm. I guess that I found some unexpected strength. I walked into the hospital and went up the escalator and went towards the escalator. As I walked into his room, a relative told me that it was a false alarm ! What happened was during the night, dad knocked his oxygen mask off and no one noticed until mid morning. An orderly came in, saw that it was off and put it back on him and didn't say anything. About 15 minures later, his nurse walked in and checked his vitals. Well, his oxygen levels were so low that the nurse thought he was in a coma ! So, between the time I left work and the time I got to the hospital, the orderly came in and said that the mask was off and she put it back on. They figure the mask was off for most of the night. Anyway, by the time I got to the room, his oxygen levels were back up to a normal level. Needless to say, I was relieved. But at the same time, I relalized that I will be ok when the time actually comes. I didn't panic and I didn't get emotional. In fact, on the way to the hospital, a song came on. I started to sing. That may sound odd, but that's what I did. I'm going to the hospital to get mom in about an hour. The hospital is a major hospital in this area. It has a big cancer clinic and everything and I live 2 blocks away from it (mom lives 3 blocks away from it.)

CarolM - I can certainly relate. My mom is still alive and even though she's 81, she acts like she's 40. The dr said that she'll live to be 100 ! LOL However, this past while has taken it's toll on her. She's never lived alone. She started to panic when she didn't know what was going to happen to dad (is he getting kicked out of hospital and sent to a far away home that costs an arm and a leg to live there.......is she going to lose the house they've lived in since 1963 because of the mounting bills etc etc etc.) Once she found out that dad will stay at the hospital and if he's around in 6 months or more, he'll get moved to palliative care at a rest home near by (covered by the government), mom was so much better. It's always the unknown that scares us. Right now, my dad and your mom are getting the best care possible. We couldn't give them that kind of care ourselves. Maybe once your mom settles in and you find that new "normal", you'll feel less stressed. When my dad went in, I was stressed to the hilt. I'm ok with everything now. I know what's going on and I know what to expect.

Wildcard - I will look up that book. Thanks to you Sunshine Lollipops and Rainbows went thru my head all day at work ! LOL Thanks. Luckily the song I sang on the way to the hospital cleared it out of my mind .......for now LOL

THH - Health anxiety has been a major one for me lately. 1 close relative and 3 people I've known for a long time have passed away since the beginning of this year. 2 unexpectedly at a pretty early age (55 and 68). Every ache and pain cause me to panic a bit. I will NEVER go on WebMD again ! LOL You are right, women are tough. Like my mom always says "If a man had to give birth, no one would be here" LOL

Forever Young - I miss Karma too ! I hope she's ok. The hospital is 2 blocks away from my house (3 blocks from mom's house.) It's the major hospital in the city with a cancer clinic and everything. It's a wide spread hospital with 9 floors.

This was the tune on the radio that I was singing to on the way to the hospital.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eAQa4MOGkE

[THH]

Manofmusic,
Good tune!
I'm glad you are getting used to the idea and flowing better with it. Its hard!!!! Sounds like you did pretty well, all things considered.

Oh I never look at web MD or look up symptoms in a book. It is just too dangerous! LOL... That is why I pay a doctor, let him figure what it all means! If you have the right doctor, one can put faith in them, they have the letters after their name!
I thought it would be funny----while watching tv, all the commercials that say "ask your doctor" if you have ppd, rls, xyz and write them all down so when I go in again I can remember to ask! LOL... Maybe if more people did they would pull the plug on all the heath commercials! LOL...

Your mom is wise! LOL....

[manofmusic]

I went to the hospital today to visit dad. He's doing much better after the radiation treatment yesterday. I went into the hospital and I didn't panic even once. I've been there so much, it feels like a second home to me now. Dad had a smile on his face and was talking good. Today was a good day all around.

Hope everyone is having a good day too !

[manofmusic]

My panic went thru the roof today. Dad was moved to palliative care at another hospital today. He's in a private room now. The room is really nice. He has his own TV, his own bathroom and the view out the window is pretty amazing. I know he's in the place with the best care now, but watching mom and dad together today made me really sad. They are so nice to each other and I don't know if I''m sad about dad or mom or me or what. I still feel selfish talking about my panic when mom is going thru this and she's taking it well (in front of people anyway). I went for my walk at the river today and that helped. I went back to the hospital to get mom and I visited for a while and as we left, I started to shake. I think I hid it well from mom.

Tomorrow I go to work and I think that going to work will actually bring me back to some sort of "normal" again. I need that right now.

[THH]

manofmusic,
Glad to hear your dad is all settled. That has to be a comfort that he is in good care, and both your mom and you live so close.
I say it is okay to be sad. It sounds like you were touched by their love and devotion to one another, that is a good thing! Maybe you are trying to be too strong and not show how you really feel. I think show your mom, maybe she can comfort you and give you a new understanding, moms do that sometimes. Ask her questions and really visit with her, maybe there is something in this that will help you. I don't think it is unusual to feel this emotion, that is what makes us human, and I personally would not want to know a person who can't be touched by something!
Good for you taking your walks too. Being in nature brings a reality that grounds us. Having your job will give you something to think about, like you say "normal".
Hang in there, you sound pretty good with everything that is going on! Give your self a big pat on the back!

[samcat]

Manofmusic,

Good to hear back from you. All things considered, I think you are handling all this pretty well. You are going through a really bad time right now. I am glad you are there for your parents, although it is very hard on you. I would bet quite a bit of your Mom's breathing problem is anxiety--how could she not be anxious? It would be perfectly normal for her right now.

You should know that you have a lot of people on this board who think the world of you--and I'll bet with your personality, a lot of people in your "real" world feel the same way. Words can't really comfort someone in your situation as much as we would like. Just know that we are thinking of you and a lot of us can relate to you because we have been in the same boat with our own parents and grandparents.

I am glad you are feeling more comfortable around the hospital now. It is a hard adjustment to go through. But it sounds like you have made it--good for you!

Hope whatever they can do will make your father more comfortable. That will be a big help for you and your Mom.

Take care of yourself too, as well as them. And don't feel selfish. You can't help them unless you take care of yourself first.

[manofmusic]

Thank you to everyone that has helped me thru all of the stuff that's been going on. Because of all of you, I am able to make it thru this time now. Dad passed away this morning at 11:20 am. Mom's taking it quite well and so am I. Dad said not to be sad because he lived his live the way he wanted to and that he had a really good life.

Thanks again for all of your thoughts and prayers thru it all. I will be off the net for a few days, but once the weekend hits, I plan on getting on with things.

By the way........not even one panic attack today.

[THH]

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, Manofmusic...
So sorry for you and your mom. Celebrate his life well, God bless...

P.S. Glad your hanging in there and doing well. Be proud!!!