OK, maybe I'm just weird!! LOL

Faith_TX · Post by **Faith_TX** » Tue Dec 02, 2008 8:51 am

The past several days I've been feeling REALLY tired, and I've been worried that maybe I'm getting depressed. I've also wondere if it has to do with the birth control pills I'm taking to regulate my hormones.

Last night I had a lot on my mind; a presentation at work, followed by an audition for our praise team at church. I couldnt' get the song to download, then couldn't get my voice to work. . . I was so frustrated I wanted to just give up.

Then, I just decided to lay down on the couch and watch TV with my husband. Suddenly I felt the rush of adrenaline coming and I told him. "here we go. . .here comes a panic attack" just sort of matter of fact. Usually I try to sort of hide it, but decided not to. He just patted me on the leg and kept on watching TV. (that was fine!)

I said "well, I know if I just relax it will go away and I'll be fine in about 15 minutes". I went through a lot of physical symptoms. I guess my body was worn out.

Anyway, suddenly was feeling better and I was feeling so happy! I guess because it felt like a little success. The thing is, when I have anxiety, I know what to tell myself and how to get through it. So, it made me feel like I'd accomplished something. Today I have been feeling pretty good. I'm feeling less tired and more upbeat.

And I had this weird thought. . . do I need anxiety to feel normal? That's just weird!

I guess the other thing is, I need to learn what to do if I feel down, borderline depressed, and my thoughts start going to "oh how depressed will I get? Will I be able to keep going to work, etc etc". When it's a panic feeling I seem to be better at overcoming it. When it feels like depression it scares me more because that's unusual for me. Then I started thinking that even the depressed feelings and my worrying about them was really just anxiety too?

I don't know. . .maybe I'm just weird. LOL

Any thoughts on that?

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Dec 02, 2008 11:48 am

OMG...you just described everythought I had today. We seem to be a lot a like. I live in the Dallas area. My name is Jennifer. We should get in touch. I talked to a counselor today and she had some interesting things to say.

marygold · Post by **marygold** » Tue Dec 02, 2008 1:09 pm

omg i feel the same way sometimes.what birth control are you on.i am on yaz and have some anxiety. i always worry that i am depressed and i am not. i fear depression because of what you see on tv. i know it is my anxiety too. just making me worry. so you are in texas. i am a texan too.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Dec 02, 2008 1:20 pm

Yes. . . I live near Fort Worth.

I'm on Loestrin 24/FE. My doctor felt that for me, it would work better. I suggested Yaz but for whatever reason (mayb just because he had samples) he put me on Loestrin.

I know what you mean about seeing depression on TV. And it's really funny in a way because anxiety can certainly be just as difficult. But, I'm "used to" it. . .I'd like to get "un-used to" it and not have to think about my thoughts and feelings so much.

JennLans, PM me.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Dec 02, 2008 5:10 pm

How do you send a PM?

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Dec 03, 2008 1:04 am

If you click on my name it brings up my profile then you can click on PM.

I wanted to hear about what your counselor said.

Dsrtdwllr · Post by **Dsrtdwllr** » Wed Dec 03, 2008 2:00 am

I know about feeling weird. I've been told all my life that I'm weird. THANK GOD!!!! There's a lot of people I don't want to be like. Often times I consider them my greatest teachers. They show me what I could have if I choose to live that way. Today I can make choices. I choose which fork in the road to take when a negative feeling arises. Am I going to live in the problem or live in the solution? I was told there two basic emotions: Love and fear. All other emotions spring out from these. Today I choose to live in the solution and focus on love. The bible says (I'm not a bible thumper) that God is love, so I figure the closer I get to love, the closer I get to God. "Live to love--love to live".

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Dec 03, 2008 10:50 am

That makes sense, Mike!!

When I look at others really closely I think I'd mostly still pick to be ME. LOL

hopehound · Post by **hopehound** » Sat Dec 06, 2008 11:41 am

FAITH, SWEETIE - you so ain't weird - your human - your finding your way. You are so a beautiful woman w/ a wonderful soul & spirit about you. What is happening, fr what I perceive, is for may what is like the 1st time in your life - you're learning to trust yourself - you're gaining a sense of security that you may have never had. So, when it comes, you question it - make sense. Keep learning to trust & love yourself. When you're at that FORK IN THE ROAD - follow the one that will allow you to follow God's will for you = love of self + certainty of self + security in you & your abilities - that YOU ARE A FABULOUS WOMAN.

Your friend,

LENORE

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Dec 07, 2008 2:32 am

Thanks Lenore!! I think you're right. Feeling good doesn't feel 'normal' sometimes, does it?!

We get there one baby step at a time though, and that's OK.