Negative Thinking

TheRogueX · Post by **TheRogueX** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 12:05 am

Hey everybody. I'm new here, just ordered the program. I haven't received it yet, and thus haven't started it, but I hope to have it soon. Until then, I'm hoping I can get some support from people who are going through things like I am, maybe hear some ideas on how to make things better in my life.

I just turned 30 a few months ago. This whole year has been an emotional whirlwind. I've been anxious and terribly depressed about the fact that I'm getting older... I feel like time is getting away from me. And I know it is, because of this anxiety. Which, so far, only makes it worse. I feel as if I've wasted my youth, that I can't get it back, and that I'm going to grow old wishing I'd done more.

Part of this, I know, has something to do with my situation. At 25 I was happily married, by 27 I had a wonderful job, a house, 2 cars, and a little baby boy. By 28 that was all over. I lost my job, my wife, my car(s), and my home in just a matter of months. I've been living the past two years in "recovery" mode, and it feels like I have to start all over. That I lost 6 1/2 years to my ex-wife, 2 years to recovering, and now I'm 30 and have nothing.

Logically, I know that I'm still young and still have plenty of time to make something of myself. But logic doesn't silence the negative voice in my head that talks about my time running short and that is always pointing out things that "prove" to me that all of this is pointless.

I don't know. My brain wants to ramble on about everything that is bothering me, but I don't want to just dump on everyone here. I don't want to sound too crazy all at once, you know?

Anyway... I want to silence that voice. I want to be able to do things without worrying about the future. I want to live now, not fearing an end of life which is still many decades away. How can I do that?

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 2:02 am

Hey, I'm turning 39 soon, and a couple years ago my husband left me and our kids for another woman. So I had that feeling of I just wasted my younger years on him because we did so much and now looking back at everything we did are no longer good thoughts. But I am going to school again and that is a huge help, it not only distracts me from the situation but it also gives me a goal. I'm in the nursing program and you become really close to the people around you. Anyway, I just wanted to say I know what you mean, I used to waste so much time on just thinking about what we had lost, but dude, get out and do something, try a second career (or first) this is my second time at college and I love it. If you're not a memeber of the gym, check that out. I love going to the gym or just getting out and exercise is a huge help, I know you've heard this all before, but it really does help

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 2:57 am

I feel the same as TheRogueX; I haven't received the program yet, and I am new here. I, too, worry about everything. In the past two years, I have begun to feel what you described---the dread that I will get to the end of my life and realize that I let this anxiety drain me of all the excitement and good that this life has to offer. I, too, know that I have a lot of life left (I will be 34 next week), but I constantly worry about making the most of my time here.
There is seldom a time when I feel absolutely good. Little things bother me because I am always in a heightened state of agitation obsessing over everything that I logically know I have no control over.
I want to start living, really living, and I'm here because I can't seem to find the way to begin this process. Any ideas?

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 3:12 am

Well - I'm 55, and it seems to me what you are speaking about are those times you just ended one thing, and have not yet started the new thing. This is a time of confusion that is normal. Until a new goal or passion is identified, you have nothing to aim toward, feeling somewhat at odds and depressed. Once the goal is sorted out and worked toward - these feelings will dissipate. New things also cause a bit of anxiety, as familiar routines are disrupted and the uncertainty of the situation is uncomfortable. All this works out given time. Just give yourself permission to be anxious about things - as that is normal after big changes. Give yourself the benefit of the doubt; you have been successful in working things out in the past - this is no different. You have new horizons to explore, and you will do more than survive - you will prosper!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 4:37 am

I am new today. I ordered the program but don't have it yet. I have struggled with generalized panic disorder for many years but recently I am having panic attacks and becoming restricted in what I can do, where I can do, if I can drive, etc. I took a "vacation" with my partner and totally lost it for five days. I was certain I was going to die. We were in a remote area. I could not hike. I could not eat in a restaurant. I could not drive. I had a two hour and twenty minute panic attack on plane trying to get home. I could not take the second leg of my flight and made my partner drive 11 hours in car. I feel SO out of control. I want to live a real life. I have so much hope for the program.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 4:43 am

Are any of you new people using medication at the moment? What else has worked? How do I stop a panic attack? Are you all able to work? I would just like to learn more.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 5:44 am

To All,

I feel for you all, but let me tell you that "you can get through this" and "you will".

I suffered terribly with anxiety for many years and after lots of searching and this program I can say I'm very PEACFULL,HAPPY, and most of all able to deal with anxiety -and I have been this way for many years now.

DIAA- I have been in your situation many times. I requested a PRN (medication used when needed) from my doctor to help me lower my level of anxiety when in those situations that were so difficult for me. This gave me some mental peace so that I could focus on getting better, don't be afraid to search this out. This program will help you,Good luck!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Oct 11, 2008 7:54 am

Such excellent replies from all here. I do want to add that as a woman who has reached the half century mark, you are never to old to change. Whatever we are doing that isn't working, we are never too old to benefit from learning a new and better way to live. I've been married and divorced. I've lost really good relationships, and worked hard to keep horrible relationships. My brother died young, my parents died this past year. I am quite alone. But I've got good friends; and if I breath on a mirror, I still see moisture. That means I have time to enjoy another day.

You will be okay. Stay with this program. It works and it works very well. Don't skip sessions or homework. You are the only person who will get shorted by doing that.
Best of luck.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Oct 13, 2008 6:46 pm

One should always have a positive approach in his life.The negative feelings must never be entertained in our lives.The spirituality helps to overcome the negative issues in our lives.It always necessary for a person to have a spiritual impact in his life to get successful.Spiritualism is the act by which an individual becomes more and more confident and gets the hints on how to stay a happy life. Your post reminds me of one another post i have seen at <A HREF="http://www.succcess.org/2008/09/01/the- ... /#comments" TARGET=_blank>http://www.succcess.org/2008/09/01/the- ... omments</A> which was also depicting the success in life.

amd · Post by **amd** » Tue Oct 14, 2008 1:45 am

hey every one,I just started my program yesterday, I just turned 47 this past sat.I live in northern Indiana, so I am one of those people who recently lost their job due to the R.V. manufacturing companies going under.Building RV'S and manufactured houses is what I've done for 17 yrs.I am a single mom with a 9 yr. old still at home.I have no idea where I'm going from here!DIAA, yes i am on meds. and have been for a long time. Ask me any thing want. I have no problem talking about it.