Ever finish any thing big?
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Guest
I think there can be many components to this.
Fear of failure.
Fear of success.
Inability to break things down into steps, and get overwhelmed at the big picture.
Deciding to do things on a whim or feelings, instead of really asking yourself why you are starting that project/job etc in the first place. Not looking realistically regarding how it will really be and what it is going to take, and without knowing those things, you can't see whether it fits with the desire you have for your life.
Fear of commitment.
I have had this problem in business and making other decisions. What I have found is that the excitement of a new thing can make it seem greater than it is. Instead of seeing what my specific gifts and passions were, I would start things that I was capable of doing, but did not have any passion for once the newness wore off. I did this several times. I started my first business at the age of 17...and went through a good handful before I figured this out. The best thing to do I think before deciding to get into ANYTHING is pray about it, research all the pros and cons for that thing or project, write out a plan....all the steps you are going to have to take to do that thing, or list all the details of what it will involve if you take that position etc. Tell yourself you won't make any decision to get into anything without thinking about it for at least "x" amount of time.
When it comes to fear of failure/success...start with smaller goals for that thing you are embarking on. Don't look at the entire picture. If you are like me and new ideas are constantly bombarding you...just jot them down in a notebook as they come, but don't start trying to analyze them or focus on their potential. Then direct your attention back to the step you are on and take things one step at a time.
Depression can also mess with you big time when it comes to motivation. If you suffer with a lot of depression, then it is crucial to break your goals into very small steps!! That way you don't go round and round with things and still feel like you have had no success because it will be months before you reach the first goal.
Practice not making decisions out of emotion. Start with small goals in everyday things on purpose, not just when you have a big decision to make. Tell someone you are going to do something, and then do it! Set one goal per week of something you are going to work on and do it.
A friend of mine's house is always a mess. She would write on her to do list "clean house" it became so overwhelming, and even when she worked on it a little, she could not check it off....and never checked it off. I told her to write down that every other day she would spend an HOUR cleaning the house. Then she started doing it because she didn't feel like she had to do it all in one day, it was only an hour, and that she wasn't ALLOWED to clean more than an hour. It actually helped her get motivated to clean for that one hour, and each day it was on her list, she got to check it off. (The whole house wasn't cleaned, but she did clean for the hour that she had on the to do list!) This motivated her even more and in no time she had everything unpacked, organized and cleaned up! Just an example.
Fear of failure.
Fear of success.
Inability to break things down into steps, and get overwhelmed at the big picture.
Deciding to do things on a whim or feelings, instead of really asking yourself why you are starting that project/job etc in the first place. Not looking realistically regarding how it will really be and what it is going to take, and without knowing those things, you can't see whether it fits with the desire you have for your life.
Fear of commitment.
I have had this problem in business and making other decisions. What I have found is that the excitement of a new thing can make it seem greater than it is. Instead of seeing what my specific gifts and passions were, I would start things that I was capable of doing, but did not have any passion for once the newness wore off. I did this several times. I started my first business at the age of 17...and went through a good handful before I figured this out. The best thing to do I think before deciding to get into ANYTHING is pray about it, research all the pros and cons for that thing or project, write out a plan....all the steps you are going to have to take to do that thing, or list all the details of what it will involve if you take that position etc. Tell yourself you won't make any decision to get into anything without thinking about it for at least "x" amount of time.
When it comes to fear of failure/success...start with smaller goals for that thing you are embarking on. Don't look at the entire picture. If you are like me and new ideas are constantly bombarding you...just jot them down in a notebook as they come, but don't start trying to analyze them or focus on their potential. Then direct your attention back to the step you are on and take things one step at a time.
Depression can also mess with you big time when it comes to motivation. If you suffer with a lot of depression, then it is crucial to break your goals into very small steps!! That way you don't go round and round with things and still feel like you have had no success because it will be months before you reach the first goal.
Practice not making decisions out of emotion. Start with small goals in everyday things on purpose, not just when you have a big decision to make. Tell someone you are going to do something, and then do it! Set one goal per week of something you are going to work on and do it.
A friend of mine's house is always a mess. She would write on her to do list "clean house" it became so overwhelming, and even when she worked on it a little, she could not check it off....and never checked it off. I told her to write down that every other day she would spend an HOUR cleaning the house. Then she started doing it because she didn't feel like she had to do it all in one day, it was only an hour, and that she wasn't ALLOWED to clean more than an hour. It actually helped her get motivated to clean for that one hour, and each day it was on her list, she got to check it off. (The whole house wasn't cleaned, but she did clean for the hour that she had on the to do list!) This motivated her even more and in no time she had everything unpacked, organized and cleaned up! Just an example.