I posted this on another thread but rather than hijacking I think it deserves its own thread.
I have no interest or motivation at all in life, nor have I achieved anything. Someone mentioned it could be Avolition?
I left school at 16 with no exams, why?? No motivation, and because of this I have floated from dead end job to dead end job, hell at the min I am stuck working in a factory for minimum wage. I can't drive, why? No motivation to take any lessons, I don't own my own home why? No motivation to save, I'm not married although we live together like husband and wife, why?? No motivation. I've never had a vacation, why?? Yes no motivation. This will make me sound bad but I have a fiance who is not the woman of my dreams, why??? She was the first who would take me, I had no motivation to try for my dream girl.
What exactly have I achieved in life? Well I have 2 kids which weren't planned, they just came along... Rather sad for my 28 years on this planet. But hey I have my health.. No I don't, I have a heart complaint which can be fixed yes but, no motivation to do so.
I suppose its no surprise I have anxiety and depression, I would say its definatly primary anxiety, depression only comes if I haven't been eating right or exercising.
Have you suffered from this? I have been through the program before and it really did cure my anxiety and depression but did nothing for this other side of me.
Total Lack Of Motivation?
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Guest
I'm not an expert but it still sounds like you are depressed, thus the lack of motivation. I have problems with motivation too but not to that degree. Not sure what to tell you except try to find a reason to start doing something. Maybe do stuff for your kids...get married, have your health fixed, etc. See if you can get your fiance to go for a walk with you in the evenings with the kids. Eventually that will give you more energy. Good luck.
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Guest
If its depression I must always of had it because I don't feel any different now than when I was a child, Lack of energy is not my problem, I am up at 6am every morning for a run. Its just motivation to do anything with life.Originally posted by HeatherRDJ:
I'm not an expert but it still sounds like you are depressed, thus the lack of motivation. I have problems with motivation too but not to that degree. Not sure what to tell you except try to find a reason to start doing something. Maybe do stuff for your kids...get married, have your health fixed, etc. See if you can get your fiance to go for a walk with you in the evenings with the kids. Eventually that will give you more energy. Good luck.
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Guest
Celeron, as you know, I have similar issues.
Have you seen a doctor? I had a sleep study done and now I am being treated for sleep apnea.
I also have a heart valve that leaks a little.
I also need to lose abot 40 lbs.
Have you had your thyroid tested? I have not.
I take blood pressure medicine and Prozac. They both say they make you drowsy.
I wonder where my motivation problems come from too. So many possible reasons for mine. From the third grade on till this April.
Let's keep searching and never surrender, never give up!!
Have you seen a doctor? I had a sleep study done and now I am being treated for sleep apnea.
I also have a heart valve that leaks a little.
I also need to lose abot 40 lbs.
Have you had your thyroid tested? I have not.
I take blood pressure medicine and Prozac. They both say they make you drowsy.
I wonder where my motivation problems come from too. So many possible reasons for mine. From the third grade on till this April.
Let's keep searching and never surrender, never give up!!
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Guest
Celeron,
Do you think it could be possible that you have some deep down fears which keep you from doing things that might make you feel more "successful"?
BTW, I do think there is definite success to have two children, continue working, (even if the job is not your dream job) and to still be with the first person you cared about.
Success? I say getting up each day is a success, especially at 6 a.m.! Oh, and you run too? That's fantastic!
It sounds to me like me, you, Don and some others that have posted - have not found what it is we enjoy doing in life.
I believe it is a bit late for me now, but I always loved and had a natural ability to dance. I let fear get in my way - fear of not making money or "making it" - say on Broadway - get in my way of even TRYING. It's such a shame because I absolutely love dancing, especially ballroom or salsa!
Anyway, I am searching for other things I enjoy and realize I don't have to make tons of money doing in. In fact, I could just volunteer my time if I want and have my work be something else that pays the bills, as long as it gives me motivation to get up each day.
I know that I have more God-given gifts than just dancing and I (and you) must try to figure out what they are. I know God has a plan for each of us to be successful.
Best wishes to you!
Do you think it could be possible that you have some deep down fears which keep you from doing things that might make you feel more "successful"?
BTW, I do think there is definite success to have two children, continue working, (even if the job is not your dream job) and to still be with the first person you cared about.
Success? I say getting up each day is a success, especially at 6 a.m.! Oh, and you run too? That's fantastic!
It sounds to me like me, you, Don and some others that have posted - have not found what it is we enjoy doing in life.
I believe it is a bit late for me now, but I always loved and had a natural ability to dance. I let fear get in my way - fear of not making money or "making it" - say on Broadway - get in my way of even TRYING. It's such a shame because I absolutely love dancing, especially ballroom or salsa!
Anyway, I am searching for other things I enjoy and realize I don't have to make tons of money doing in. In fact, I could just volunteer my time if I want and have my work be something else that pays the bills, as long as it gives me motivation to get up each day.
I know that I have more God-given gifts than just dancing and I (and you) must try to figure out what they are. I know God has a plan for each of us to be successful.
Best wishes to you!
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Guest
The problem is we all have different definitions of sucess, My partner is in the same boat, but her idea of sucess is raising 2 kids, So she is happy, in her eyes she is a sucess. My idea of sucess is being financially free, running my own business. Totally different from my partners ideaOriginally posted by sunbound:
Celeron,
Do you think it could be possible that you have some deep down fears which keep you from doing things that might make you feel more "successful"?
BTW, I do think there is definite success to have two children, continue working, (even if the job is not your dream job) and to still be with the first person you cared about.
Success? I say getting up each day is a success, especially at 6 a.m.! Oh, and you run too? That's fantastic!
It sounds to me like me, you, Don and some others that have posted - have not found what it is we enjoy doing in life.
I believe it is a bit late for me now, but I always loved and had a natural ability to dance. I let fear get in my way - fear of not making money or "making it" - say on Broadway - get in my way of even TRYING. It's such a shame because I absolutely love dancing, especially ballroom or salsa!
Anyway, I am searching for other things I enjoy and realize I don't have to make tons of money doing in. In fact, I could just volunteer my time if I want and have my work be something else that pays the bills, as long as it gives me motivation to get up each day.
I know that I have more God-given gifts than just dancing and I (and you) must try to figure out what they are. I know God has a plan for each of us to be successful.
Best wishes to you!
-
Guest
When one sees themselves in a negative light, you do not feel good about yourself. You can see yourself and say WHY BOTHER because I am such a lame person, I have not done this, I have not done that, I stink at this, my job stinks, etc, etc. You have beat yourself up with a baseball bat and of COURSE you are going to not feel like doing anything because in your mind you basically suck because of the expectations you have set for yourself. You should have done this , you should have done that and since you did not, then you have not accomplish much of anything therefore you are a complete failure. This is the way it goes, no? Well this is truly the wrong way to see yourself. I also used to look at others that held high paying jobs, had expensive homes and vehicles because they made it. They have it all, they have achieved the good life.
BOLOGNA! My life is NOT over and I still have MANY opportunities to achieve MANY things in life!
None of those material things matter though. This is MORE for me, to prove to myself that YES I CAN! I see people seemingly "have it all" (material things) but they really do not "have it all". The husband is out of town and not home with the family, the wife is unhappy in the marriage, the kids are out of control because mom is tired and has no support from hubby because he is out of town making the money to support this lifestyle. So what QUALITY is there? Plus HEALTH! If you do not have your health, you really have nothing. I know people that suffer daily with various health issues or diseases on a daily basis that would their material and monetary wealth for health.
Put things into perspective. My husbands uncle that is 80 told us that to have your health is EVERYTHING. All the material things are not important, you cannot take it with you anyhow. Enjoy your family and friends, because when things get a bit trying, THEY will be there. Things do not do anything for anyone.
I am 38 and went back to school 3 years ago. I was agoraphobic, depressed and anxiety ridden. I too felt I did not accomplish much of anything, I never had a college degree. I looked around and almost everyone I knew had one including my husband. Why couldn't I? There was NO reason why I could not go back to school, so I did. At first I felt that I was too old along with many other excuses but each and every assignment and exam, I aced! Sure I studied and that time and effort paid off. I needed to get out of my comfort zone, see that I deserved to do something for me, that I really was capable of doing something for me. Sure I could have just got another job and winged it, but I felt inside I needed to do something more for myself and my family. I took the steps I felt would better my life situation not for monetary reasons but for what I needed to do for me the person on the inside, to feel better about me. I have proved to myself that I am capable of accomplishing challenges and that boosts my self esteem and confidence which makes me want to challenge myself even further. it is a learning and growing experience for me.
It NEVER is too late to do the things you need to do for yourself. If you feel you need a higher education, go for it. If you feel you want to go on a vacation, book one! YOU need to take some steps forward to prove to yourself that YES YOU CAN do these things and actually enjoy moving forward by participating in whatever it is...vacation, getting married, maybe seeking that dream job or at least get your foot in the door of the field you enjoy. For example if you like animals and maybe would like to be a Vet Tech or a Vet, see if you can get a job in a vets office. If you like welding, see if you can get a job at a machine shop and even if it starts in the tool room, it could advance to other areas in the company.
Start by doing something for yourself. Yes it is hard and stinks when you feel like not dong anything but it does get easier each and every time to do things. Yes you deserve to live the life you dreamed of. You just need to put one foot in front of the other for yourself and start living your life for you and your kids.
BOLOGNA! My life is NOT over and I still have MANY opportunities to achieve MANY things in life!
None of those material things matter though. This is MORE for me, to prove to myself that YES I CAN! I see people seemingly "have it all" (material things) but they really do not "have it all". The husband is out of town and not home with the family, the wife is unhappy in the marriage, the kids are out of control because mom is tired and has no support from hubby because he is out of town making the money to support this lifestyle. So what QUALITY is there? Plus HEALTH! If you do not have your health, you really have nothing. I know people that suffer daily with various health issues or diseases on a daily basis that would their material and monetary wealth for health.
Put things into perspective. My husbands uncle that is 80 told us that to have your health is EVERYTHING. All the material things are not important, you cannot take it with you anyhow. Enjoy your family and friends, because when things get a bit trying, THEY will be there. Things do not do anything for anyone.
I am 38 and went back to school 3 years ago. I was agoraphobic, depressed and anxiety ridden. I too felt I did not accomplish much of anything, I never had a college degree. I looked around and almost everyone I knew had one including my husband. Why couldn't I? There was NO reason why I could not go back to school, so I did. At first I felt that I was too old along with many other excuses but each and every assignment and exam, I aced! Sure I studied and that time and effort paid off. I needed to get out of my comfort zone, see that I deserved to do something for me, that I really was capable of doing something for me. Sure I could have just got another job and winged it, but I felt inside I needed to do something more for myself and my family. I took the steps I felt would better my life situation not for monetary reasons but for what I needed to do for me the person on the inside, to feel better about me. I have proved to myself that I am capable of accomplishing challenges and that boosts my self esteem and confidence which makes me want to challenge myself even further. it is a learning and growing experience for me.
It NEVER is too late to do the things you need to do for yourself. If you feel you need a higher education, go for it. If you feel you want to go on a vacation, book one! YOU need to take some steps forward to prove to yourself that YES YOU CAN do these things and actually enjoy moving forward by participating in whatever it is...vacation, getting married, maybe seeking that dream job or at least get your foot in the door of the field you enjoy. For example if you like animals and maybe would like to be a Vet Tech or a Vet, see if you can get a job in a vets office. If you like welding, see if you can get a job at a machine shop and even if it starts in the tool room, it could advance to other areas in the company.
Start by doing something for yourself. Yes it is hard and stinks when you feel like not dong anything but it does get easier each and every time to do things. Yes you deserve to live the life you dreamed of. You just need to put one foot in front of the other for yourself and start living your life for you and your kids.
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Guest
Thanks for that post. Problem was and still is with my family no one has ever went to college/university. It was bread into you from a child you went to school, got a job and you stuck at it and be grateful for the job, My entire family are underachievers, they had no dreams, no goals, they just float along with no clear direction in life. I look at my father I have turned out the exact same as him, I am almost 100% sure he has a problem with anxiety and depression also, but he would never admit it, Thats another problem with my family,in fact the Irish/British in general, we are expected to bottle everything up, as a male to admit you have anxiety, your are labeled "Funny" its seen as a sign of weakness to admit your feelings and fears which I thin is very sad. When you are in need you get no support, Time I got diagnosed with anxiety, I told my mother, He reaction was "Get out and pull yourself together" So I've never told anyone else, not even my fiance who I have been with for 8 years knows.Originally posted by ~*schnauzermom*~:
When one sees themselves in a negative light, you do not feel good about yourself. You can see yourself and say WHY BOTHER because I am such a lame person, I have not done this, I have not done that, I stink at this, my job stinks, etc, etc. You have beat yourself up with a baseball bat and of COURSE you are going to not feel like doing anything because in your mind you basically suck because of the expectations you have set for yourself. You should have done this , you should have done that and since you did not, then you have not accomplish much of anything therefore you are a complete failure. This is the way it goes, no? Well this is truly the wrong way to see yourself. I also used to look at others that held high paying jobs, had expensive homes and vehicles because they made it. They have it all, they have achieved the good life.
BOLOGNA! My life is NOT over and I still have MANY opportunities to achieve MANY things in life!
None of those material things matter though. This is MORE for me, to prove to myself that YES I CAN! I see people seemingly "have it all" (material things) but they really do not "have it all". The husband is out of town and not home with the family, the wife is unhappy in the marriage, the kids are out of control because mom is tired and has no support from hubby because he is out of town making the money to support this lifestyle. So what QUALITY is there? Plus HEALTH! If you do not have your health, you really have nothing. I know people that suffer daily with various health issues or diseases on a daily basis that would their material and monetary wealth for health.
Put things into perspective. My husbands uncle that is 80 told us that to have your health is EVERYTHING. All the material things are not important, you cannot take it with you anyhow. Enjoy your family and friends, because when things get a bit trying, THEY will be there. Things do not do anything for anyone.
I am 38 and went back to school 3 years ago. I was agoraphobic, depressed and anxiety ridden. I too felt I did not accomplish much of anything, I never had a college degree. I looked around and almost everyone I knew had one including my husband. Why couldn't I? There was NO reason why I could not go back to school, so I did. At first I felt that I was too old along with many other excuses but each and every assignment and exam, I aced! Sure I studied and that time and effort paid off. I needed to get out of my comfort zone, see that I deserved to do something for me, that I really was capable of doing something for me. Sure I could have just got another job and winged it, but I felt inside I needed to do something more for myself and my family. I took the steps I felt would better my life situation not for monetary reasons but for what I needed to do for me the person on the inside, to feel better about me. I have proved to myself that I am capable of accomplishing challenges and that boosts my self esteem and confidence which makes me want to challenge myself even further. it is a learning and growing experience for me.
It NEVER is too late to do the things you need to do for yourself. If you feel you need a higher education, go for it. If you feel you want to go on a vacation, book one! YOU need to take some steps forward to prove to yourself that YES YOU CAN do these things and actually enjoy moving forward by participating in whatever it is...vacation, getting married, maybe seeking that dream job or at least get your foot in the door of the field you enjoy. For example if you like animals and maybe would like to be a Vet Tech or a Vet, see if you can get a job in a vets office. If you like welding, see if you can get a job at a machine shop and even if it starts in the tool room, it could advance to other areas in the company.
Start by doing something for yourself. Yes it is hard and stinks when you feel like not dong anything but it does get easier each and every time to do things. Yes you deserve to live the life you dreamed of. You just need to put one foot in front of the other for yourself and start living your life for you and your kids.
We have a university over here called the Open University, basically its a home study university, and if you are on a low wage like me you don't pay a penny, I did 1 year of a degree 2 years ago when I was house bound with agoraphobia, I passed but I decided not to continue because A= Instead of taking 3 years for a normal degree this took 6 and B= Everyone seems to have a degree now adays, know people who have degree's working in McDonalds flipping burgers as they can't get jobs. I was thinking about starting again in October but not sure if its the right thing.
One thing I do know is I need to take drastic action to get my life back on track, but exactly what that drastic action is I don't know.
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Guest
Celeron,
It sounds like you've got a good handle on where the lack of motivation comes from. It's hard to shake things of our past and move forward.
I can't tell you if going back to school is the right thing for you, but it certainly may give you exposure to things that you may not have already been exposed to. In that, you may find something that really interests you, which could give you the inspiration to have your own business.
Another thing is that it's tough enough for those of us who have anxiety and depression and can share it with family or close friends who try to support us. I commend you for turning to all of us as your support!
Best wishes to you in your endeavors.
It sounds like you've got a good handle on where the lack of motivation comes from. It's hard to shake things of our past and move forward.
I can't tell you if going back to school is the right thing for you, but it certainly may give you exposure to things that you may not have already been exposed to. In that, you may find something that really interests you, which could give you the inspiration to have your own business.
Another thing is that it's tough enough for those of us who have anxiety and depression and can share it with family or close friends who try to support us. I commend you for turning to all of us as your support!
Best wishes to you in your endeavors.