I've been working on bringing my expectations back to reality and I just started session 3 of the program which is all about stopping negative thinking and start taking care of yourself and becoming a postive thinker. I struggle with perfectionism and beating myself up over not meeting high expectations I set for myself and I know that... but I also beat myself for not meeting high expectations someone else has for me. Someone important to me, and a prominent figure in my life, has incredibly high expectations, both for himself and for me. It has been a sore spot for us for awhile bc we fight about it bc when I can't meet those goals/expectations I get down on myself and he gets frustrated. He knows he does this and that its unfair but he can't seem to stop.
Anyone have any advice on how to deal w/ high expecations when they come from an external source? It's hard to build my self esteem when I know I'm letting someone down. And that's not my anxiety talking, we both know I let him down.
Dealing with high expectations...
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Guest
I struggle with the same thing. I would try to be perfect all the time and when I failed to do so, as everyone does I would feel miserable. I would hate myself. One technique that seems to work for me is try looking at it from the outside. If someone else was doing whatever you were doing, would you be dispointed in them. Mostly likely not. The people who matter will like you exactly as you are and the rest don't matter. If this person cannot except you as a whole than they shouldn't matter as hard it is to accept that. I know its something I struggle with. I think you should talk to this person about how you feel and how they make you feel. Maybe they don't realize they are holding you to such high standards or how it is affecting you.