Funguy,
You ever see a Hunk of Clay??? You know like potters use?
Well basically thats what we all are. Hunks of clay. God is the potter, now as God begins to mold us, just like the potter, He sees flaws and grooves in us. And just like the potter,, God continues to work US (the clay) with impurities and imperfections and all.
Sometimes, there are cracks, and like the potter adds water, and carefully fills in the crack, God carefully touches us, and stays right there with us, and heals the wounds.
God knows when your angry, hurt, sad, frustrated and even when you say, im not going any further.
But, God never leaves YOU (the clay) regardless of how many times, your cracked, or have a hole in your heart, or "feel" like he has rejected or left you alone. HE hasnt!
Part of the molded process is being put in the fire... And we go through refining by troubles, heartaches, disappointments, all of which are part of life... God is giving us wisdom and knowledge and unconditional love through ALL of lifes troubles.
And those time when you just know he isnt there,, the POTTER himself is carrying YOU through whatever the trial is. Hes a personal God! take care Nelly:)
Mad at God
My fiance and I like to talk philosophy. The biggest question we've discussed is whether or not the future is set. Does God have a plan laid out for us? Or do we make our own future as we go? The answer we've come to is: Both.
God gave us free will, so we do make our own decisions. Only, he knows what we're going to decide. He knows the future although he did not necessarily write it. We make it ourselves, but he'll nudge us in the right direction if we let him.
When my fiance and I were younger, we grew up in the same city, but we never met until we were 18 & 19. I used to lay awake at night and pray that I would meet someone. I would say, "God I don't need a boyfriend, just PLEASE make sure I have a date to homecoming and prom my senior year." I continued to pray like that for 5 years. During that five years, when my fiance was about 16, his family had the opportunity to move to Seattle. Everyone was for it but him. He said he didn't have any reason to stay and it would have benefited him to go, but he was the only one who wanted to stay. He said he didn't even know why. Well, I do. It was God answering my prayers. He was my first boyfriend, he took me to homecoming and prom and we've been together for 8 1/2 years. God's there. You just don't know it...
God gave us free will, so we do make our own decisions. Only, he knows what we're going to decide. He knows the future although he did not necessarily write it. We make it ourselves, but he'll nudge us in the right direction if we let him.
When my fiance and I were younger, we grew up in the same city, but we never met until we were 18 & 19. I used to lay awake at night and pray that I would meet someone. I would say, "God I don't need a boyfriend, just PLEASE make sure I have a date to homecoming and prom my senior year." I continued to pray like that for 5 years. During that five years, when my fiance was about 16, his family had the opportunity to move to Seattle. Everyone was for it but him. He said he didn't have any reason to stay and it would have benefited him to go, but he was the only one who wanted to stay. He said he didn't even know why. Well, I do. It was God answering my prayers. He was my first boyfriend, he took me to homecoming and prom and we've been together for 8 1/2 years. God's there. You just don't know it...
Hello, I've had my own experiences at not understanding why God has allowed something bad to happen to me. And while I'm going through the ordeal, it really is frustrating. I usually find that when things are really bad, I tend to pray more. Or, if I'm challanged with something, I tend to want to find the answer. Currently, my husband is the one who's mad at God. He won't tell me why he's mad, but he stopped going to church, stopped praying, doesn't want to talk about God. He even blocked the Catholic channel on our tv. This has been going on for almost a year now. It's tearing our family apart. It's a major source of my depression. If someone can't tell their own spouse of 18 years, why they're "mad at God" then there must be something wrong with their marriage. All my friends are telling me to leave him, he's never really been nice to me...and the only thing that held our family together was our faith (we were married in the Church, taught marriage prep classes together, homeschool our sons in the Catholic Faith for the past 11 years, attended yearly family retreats at St. Anne de Beaupre, made our Cursillos nearly 10 years ago, prayed together as a family on a regular basis, held a prayer group in our home for years, etc) And NOW he can't tell me why he's so mad at God. He just says, "God and I don't see eye to eye." Like he's a five year old or something. If anyone reads this...please pray for our family. THANKS!
AngelKL -
Your husband seems to be acting very childish. I'm sure you've asked him why and he won't let you in. It seems he doesn't want help right now. You might want to take this opportunity to examine your marriage more closely. If your faith was the only thing holding your marriage together, maybe there isn't much else to it. I wouldn't necessarily say to up and leave him, but I would suggest you tell him about your doubts. Tell him you feel his lack of communication is an indication of a weak marriage, and you partly blame yourself (which you didn't say, but I'm sure you do). Tell him you want to work on this because you want to keep your marriage. If he doesn't want to include you, maybe your marriage isn't worth it to him.
Also, you drew the conclusion that if he can't tell you, that must mean there's "something wrong with the marriage." That's not necessarily true. There may just be something wrong with him. He seems too stubborn to admit his anger or shortcomings. I don't think this has anything to do with you or your marriage. I think it's just him.
Definitely try to work on this issue, but please don't blame yourself. You're not the problem here. The person who is closing himself off to his family is the problem. My father did the same thing and he ended up leaving us. It was NOT my mother's fault, my sister's fault, or my fault. He was doing it to himself and wouldn't let us help. Then blamed us for not helping. Hello!? How could we help him if he would bite our heads off every time we said something? People like that are confused in their own head. They sometimes have to find their own way. I just hope he finds his way with you.
Your husband seems to be acting very childish. I'm sure you've asked him why and he won't let you in. It seems he doesn't want help right now. You might want to take this opportunity to examine your marriage more closely. If your faith was the only thing holding your marriage together, maybe there isn't much else to it. I wouldn't necessarily say to up and leave him, but I would suggest you tell him about your doubts. Tell him you feel his lack of communication is an indication of a weak marriage, and you partly blame yourself (which you didn't say, but I'm sure you do). Tell him you want to work on this because you want to keep your marriage. If he doesn't want to include you, maybe your marriage isn't worth it to him.
Also, you drew the conclusion that if he can't tell you, that must mean there's "something wrong with the marriage." That's not necessarily true. There may just be something wrong with him. He seems too stubborn to admit his anger or shortcomings. I don't think this has anything to do with you or your marriage. I think it's just him.
Definitely try to work on this issue, but please don't blame yourself. You're not the problem here. The person who is closing himself off to his family is the problem. My father did the same thing and he ended up leaving us. It was NOT my mother's fault, my sister's fault, or my fault. He was doing it to himself and wouldn't let us help. Then blamed us for not helping. Hello!? How could we help him if he would bite our heads off every time we said something? People like that are confused in their own head. They sometimes have to find their own way. I just hope he finds his way with you.
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bevhembree
- Posts: 275
- Joined: Fri Dec 14, 2007 10:44 am
We are lifting you up in prayer, hon. Don't let your husband's lack of faith spill over to say the marriage is bad. It's not exactly good b/c of his holding it all in. Probably he feel hopeless, helpless or maybe let down. You have to just focus on supporting him and being there for him. Maybe God will soften his heart so that he can talk to you and you can help him. But what he's doing has no bearing on you as far as fault goes. Your hands are pretty much tied. God will work on him. He's pushed God out, but God will get through to him somehow and in His own time. We pray for strength for you during this time. Hang in there and try to just hold on. Beverly
"Here and happy because of my three little angels- Marie, Chad and Cady."
Funguy,
this a good topic for me right now.
Recently i've been working on my resentments with god.
i'm working through it by doing a 4th step inventory, don't know if your familiar with AA but it's from their big book. i'm in alanon and we often also refer to the big book.
anyways what you do is write down a list of who you are holding resentments against. In this case for me it's god.
Then you write down the cause...
He took my brother.
He made me this way; i'm not smart enough, i have mental illness, i'm not talented enough.
He made the world this way; war, terrorism, poverty, starvation, disease.
Then you write down how these cause effect you.
My brother dieing in a car accident took away my sense of security in the world, it turned my world at 15 upside down. It left me frightened and lost.
Me not being smart enough, having the mental illness, and not being talented enough all are about my self esteem and my ambitions. These are self-seeking motivations. The mental illness also effects my sense of security.
War, poverty, starvation, disease and terrorism all effect my sense of security in this world. Again, without feeling secure I feel frightened and angry. Angry especially when i can't do anything about it which causes hopelessness and depression.
Now i'm at the part where i need to let this go. it does nothing for me to hold on to this but create a rift inside of me and with my higher power.
That's where I am now. Turning it over.
this a good topic for me right now.
Recently i've been working on my resentments with god.
i'm working through it by doing a 4th step inventory, don't know if your familiar with AA but it's from their big book. i'm in alanon and we often also refer to the big book.
anyways what you do is write down a list of who you are holding resentments against. In this case for me it's god.
Then you write down the cause...
He took my brother.
He made me this way; i'm not smart enough, i have mental illness, i'm not talented enough.
He made the world this way; war, terrorism, poverty, starvation, disease.
Then you write down how these cause effect you.
My brother dieing in a car accident took away my sense of security in the world, it turned my world at 15 upside down. It left me frightened and lost.
Me not being smart enough, having the mental illness, and not being talented enough all are about my self esteem and my ambitions. These are self-seeking motivations. The mental illness also effects my sense of security.
War, poverty, starvation, disease and terrorism all effect my sense of security in this world. Again, without feeling secure I feel frightened and angry. Angry especially when i can't do anything about it which causes hopelessness and depression.
Now i'm at the part where i need to let this go. it does nothing for me to hold on to this but create a rift inside of me and with my higher power.
That's where I am now. Turning it over.
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BrendaDreams
- Posts: 7
- Joined: Mon May 12, 2008 11:48 pm
I've been dealing with the same problem. I'm angry that I have some crazy neuromuscular problem that makes everyday things hard. I don't get why my screwed-up older bro and sis are perfectly healthy while I'm not. I'm not an alcoholic or a crack-head, etc. However, I know this isn't logical or productive, but it is how I feel at least once a day.
I did read When Bad Things Happen to Good People and it helped me understand some.
I did read When Bad Things Happen to Good People and it helped me understand some.
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent"- Eleanor Roosevelt
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HeatherRDJ
- Posts: 26
- Joined: Tue Mar 18, 2008 9:03 pm
My brother was perfectly at peace when he died at 15 with God and I wish I could say the same. What really bothers me is little kids dying of cancer but adults survive it even when they are old or have led immoral lives. We just watched this tv show where a porn star had leukemia and half her chest was covered in tumors and she's in remission now! My mom says its because they are ready to go to heaven (haven't been saved, etc.) but it doesn't make me feel much better.
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getting thru this
- Posts: 12
- Joined: Sun May 25, 2008 1:49 pm
jitters this topic had a very sommon effect on me but it does say it rains on the just and unjust i have been having issues also my son in law was murdered when my grandchildren were 14mos (boy) 2 and 4(girls) then almost a years later of course (BOTH WERE NEAR CHRISTMAS TIME)
my bro passe in a car accident 6 mos later my friend passed from lung cancer before all this in 93 i was run over by car and homebound for 2 ears they said i would not walk but found dr and prayed 2 months and surgery i walked now i am great it destroyed my left leg but now can not even tll it you see i also had alot of issues with all this but what keeps me going is this( GOD DOES NOT PUNISH US HE JUST PERMITS THINGS AND OUR UNDERSTANDING IS NOWHERE NEAR OUR CREATURES I HAD A BIG PRBLEM FOR ALONG TIME I AM TALKING YRS BUT I HAVE RECENTLY REALIZED (i) HAVE NO CONTROL AND HAVE TO WORK THROUGH MY OWN FEELINGS B/CAUSE AFTER ALL DO WE REALLY DONT UNDERSTAND ????WE CAN NOT CONTROL THESE THINGS )and he is in control
my bro passe in a car accident 6 mos later my friend passed from lung cancer before all this in 93 i was run over by car and homebound for 2 ears they said i would not walk but found dr and prayed 2 months and surgery i walked now i am great it destroyed my left leg but now can not even tll it you see i also had alot of issues with all this but what keeps me going is this( GOD DOES NOT PUNISH US HE JUST PERMITS THINGS AND OUR UNDERSTANDING IS NOWHERE NEAR OUR CREATURES I HAD A BIG PRBLEM FOR ALONG TIME I AM TALKING YRS BUT I HAVE RECENTLY REALIZED (i) HAVE NO CONTROL AND HAVE TO WORK THROUGH MY OWN FEELINGS B/CAUSE AFTER ALL DO WE REALLY DONT UNDERSTAND ????WE CAN NOT CONTROL THESE THINGS )and he is in control
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getting thru this
- Posts: 12
- Joined: Sun May 25, 2008 1:49 pm