I challenged myself to slowing down(on the computer), living one day at a time and trying not to take my self so "seriously" as one person put it 
I have learned a few things in the past few weeks, and the most important lesson I've learned, is that anxiety/depression/OCD is NOT beating me 
... The sun rises and it sets, everyday, regardless of how I am "feeling". I CHOOSE how I will react, think and feel!!! PERIOD!!! In the last few weeks, I am absolutely astounded at how many people I have talked to that have anxiety on a regular basis 
This has made me really realize that I AM NOT abnormal/crazy.. I just "react" to it differently than most. It truley is ME causing this pain on myself. Being a mother of six children is hardly a walk in the park. I have no time to myself really and I've found myself in a rut. Because I am so consumed with this beautifully designed "stress" , I find myself "in my head" entirely way TOO MUCH..In some weird way, being in my head takes me out of the moment(which scares me and leads to thoughts of going crazy, again) I NEED to give myself a break, and be easy on myself. And take time for ME!Everyday I chose what "thoughts" I will entertain for the day.. That realization has been the hardest thing for me to except.. How can one "choose" to entertain scary thoughts about their families, friends, etc??? I've come to find out that I am a very CONTROLLING person. I've always had to know the whats and where's of everything(in other words, I'm NOSEY
), if that makes sense??? It's like this...If I can imagine something happening, than "when or What if" it happens(which is already proven, that most of the things we fear never really do happen)you'lle be ready for it... That my friends is my problem. But I now recognize it therefore I am working on it. And let me tell you, it's been a difficult task, but I'm beginning to see how far I've come. I just thought I'd share some of my "self" observations, and encourage everyone to go through the program. It works!! and especially, ask eachother for help through this! Don't feel that any question is a stupid question..We've all been through it! There has been so many kind people on this site, and I will forever be grateful!! I want to especially thank ALL the Senior members that helped me in the beginning of this journey, They are the glue that made me stick to it! I do want to mention two special people on this site that though our conversations have been but a few, has really given me the most insight and understanding BOON and LENORE You both are a God send to me. Oh and by the way, BOON..The stop sign thing REALLY works!!! Don't ever stop posting this great advice!!! Thanks for listening and always having an answer for me when I've needed guidance. Most of all, to my Heavenly Father for not giving up on me!!! He's my TRUE source of strength!! Thank you all for listening, I hope it brings encouragement for others. We're on our way, growing stronger everyday!!!!
God bless all of you,
Robin