Finding it really hard to stay positive

ikemastree · Post by **ikemastree** » Mon Mar 17, 2008 2:17 pm

I have always been the kind of person that puts my self and my feelings last. I always feel guilty when I say no or quit a job to better myself. I worry about people being mad at me or not liking me. So I have always looked for reassurance from others. But my question is how do I tell myself that I feel good in the morning and believe it? or I am a good person? or whatever me negative thought might be? Please help. I really want to kick these thoughts and feelings in the butt so I can get on with me ife and be a better mother.

dolyeochagi · Post by **dolyeochagi** » Mon Mar 17, 2008 3:37 pm

Hi Ikemastree, you should really take a good look at yourself and realize you are worth more than you think. Don't worry so much about people liking you. If you are a good person which sounds like this is the case people are going to automatically like, love and appreciate you. If you have to say no about certains things don't let this bring you down, it sounds like you are worried about pleasing everyone around you and in the process are making yourself miserable. Have you thought about going to counselling? This may help you out alot. Don't put yourself last, this will certainly give you low self esteem. I used to put myself last and in the process got hurt by alot of people. You are worth more than you think. When you wake up in the morning tell yourself " I am going to have a good day today, I am a good mother, I can face anything that comes my way and get through it with a positive outcome." I myself have had alot of past issues that gave me low self esteem and I had to turn it around because I know that by having those negative thoughts they would only bring me down. I hope this helps

Prv31Mom · Post by **Prv31Mom** » Thu Mar 20, 2008 2:21 am

It's hard to truly be able to love others if we don't love ourselves. If you are able to respect yourself enough to realize what your needs and wants are and then to meet them, you WILL become the person that you want to be!

Also - and I know this is hard because I struggle with it too - remember that you are not responsible for other people's feelings. You can NOT MAKE them feel any way that they don't allow themselves to feel. Likewise, they can NOT make you feel anyway that you don't allow YOURSELF to feel. If they get upset when you say "No - I can't do that today" - then they have to deal with that...it is not your responsbility to make them feel better about your decision to protect and nurture yourself.

Blessings,
Dawn