Problems Just Started
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Jerry Cerny
- Posts: 1
- Joined: Wed Feb 06, 2008 1:03 pm
My wife and I adopted a daughter from China in 1996 when she was 10 months old. Ever since she has been old enough to make her our decisions, she has been a challenge. We originally thought she was just stubborn and/or strong willed. We tried all the normal discipline but not ever worked. We now find out she has serious adoption, attachment and how hormonal issues. She was in counseling from 3-5th grades, one-on-one, which doesn't work with kids with attachments issues. She now refused to go to a mental health professional so we have no professional help with her at the present time. I had an emotional melt-down a couple of weeks ago and an working very hard to work through it. I am on sleeping pills and anti-anxiety medication and am 4 weeks into the Stress and Anxiety program. I know Monica has tremendous power over my wife, son and I and this is what I have to get beyond to help her, myself and my family. I am using self talk and prayers continually through the day. Any advise would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
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Guest
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Guest
Jerry.....take a deep breath
first remember if she is acting this way she cant control it...shes not being a bad person its her behaivor and she needs the help she needs to get better. Im not sure how old your daughter is but she needs you to help guide her into the professional help she needs to be well....She needs lots of encouragement and love....an overabundance. Its got to be hard to be in a country not your own with people not like you and know that your real parents didnt want you.....even though a loving family did.
I would say find a good therapist that is a woman maybe a younger woman so that she connect better and dont refer to it as a mental health person. That implies shes mental...be more concious of your words....be gentle and caring.
If you suffer with anxiety and she lives with you she might have picked up some of your traits by living with you and on top of the other issues she has going on thats a lot for a small child to go through.
Be patient and step lightly....choose your words carefully. be assertive with her not aggressive. Your the parent so you have to pull it together and you can!
Deep breaths. relax........put calm back into your life. start small. Its hard to advise on limited information so if you want to talk more please pm me....Id be happy to try to offer help if I can.
Dodger
first remember if she is acting this way she cant control it...shes not being a bad person its her behaivor and she needs the help she needs to get better. Im not sure how old your daughter is but she needs you to help guide her into the professional help she needs to be well....She needs lots of encouragement and love....an overabundance. Its got to be hard to be in a country not your own with people not like you and know that your real parents didnt want you.....even though a loving family did.
I would say find a good therapist that is a woman maybe a younger woman so that she connect better and dont refer to it as a mental health person. That implies shes mental...be more concious of your words....be gentle and caring.
If you suffer with anxiety and she lives with you she might have picked up some of your traits by living with you and on top of the other issues she has going on thats a lot for a small child to go through.
Be patient and step lightly....choose your words carefully. be assertive with her not aggressive. Your the parent so you have to pull it together and you can!
Deep breaths. relax........put calm back into your life. start small. Its hard to advise on limited information so if you want to talk more please pm me....Id be happy to try to offer help if I can.
Dodger