I get the DailyOm in my email box every day. I always seem to get just the right message at just the right time. This one might give you some peace of mind:
June 17, 2010
Below the Surface
Finding Deep Strength
We have all have times in our lives when we think we don’t have the strength to carry on. You do, and you can.
We have all faced moments in our lives when the pressure mounts beyond what we feel we can handle, and we find ourselves thinking that we do not have the strength to carry on. Sometimes we have just gotten through a major obstacle or illness only to find another one waiting for us the moment we finally catch our breath. Sometimes we endure one loss after another, wondering when we will get a break from life’s travails. It does not seem fair or right that life should demand more of us when we feel we have given all we can, but sometimes this is the way life works.
When we look back on our lives, we see that we have survived many trials and surmounted many obstacles, often to our own amazement. In each of those instances, we had to break through our ideas about how much we can handle and go deeper into our hidden reserves. The thought that we do not have the strength to handle what is before us can be likened to the hard surface of a frozen lake. It appears to be an impenetrable fact, but when we break through it, we find that a deep well of energy and inspiration was trapped beneath that icy barrier the whole time. Sometimes we break through by cutting a hole into our resistance with our willpower, and sometimes we melt the ice with compassion for our predicament and ourselves. Either way, each time we break through, we reach a new understanding of the strength we store within ourselves.
When we find ourselves up against that frozen barrier of thinking we cannot handle our situation, we may find that the kindest choice is to love ourselves and our resistance too. We can simply accept that we are overwhelmed, exhausted, and stretched, and we can offer ourselves loving kindness and compassion. If we can extend to ourselves the unconditional warmth of a mother’s love, before we know it, the ice will begin to break.
Okay Guys, give me strength.....
Missgsr,
Thank you for that. It's very early in the morning, and already I was fighting the defeat in my head about my dad. Once again, right when my family was starting to feel positive, we find out that b/c of insurance reasons, my dad has to be moved to a nursing/rehab facility. The facility he is in now expects him to do three hrs of rehab daily and he cannot do that much yet. I feel so scared for him. I know that my mom and siblings and I will make sure he gets in a good place and stay on them constantly....making sure he gets what he needs until he can be hopefully, put back to the place he is right now.
I keep having thoughts of him not being taken care of right and he can't talk. My mom has broken down a couple of nights on the phone and that makes me feel so helpless. Still, missgsr, your post made sense and ironically, i read it this morning when I was feeling that way! Please pray for us and once again, thanks everyone for your comforting posts.
Thank you for that. It's very early in the morning, and already I was fighting the defeat in my head about my dad. Once again, right when my family was starting to feel positive, we find out that b/c of insurance reasons, my dad has to be moved to a nursing/rehab facility. The facility he is in now expects him to do three hrs of rehab daily and he cannot do that much yet. I feel so scared for him. I know that my mom and siblings and I will make sure he gets in a good place and stay on them constantly....making sure he gets what he needs until he can be hopefully, put back to the place he is right now.
I keep having thoughts of him not being taken care of right and he can't talk. My mom has broken down a couple of nights on the phone and that makes me feel so helpless. Still, missgsr, your post made sense and ironically, i read it this morning when I was feeling that way! Please pray for us and once again, thanks everyone for your comforting posts.
Karmerri...
I pray that you are having a wonderful day. I find that when I get dressed up and make an effort to be nice to others, that my day goes better. I notice that when I offer a smile or conversation, it takes the focus off of ME! You need to learn to focus on other positive things....don't dwell on things that you have no control over. Continue to pray and lean on those who care about you. Find that silver lining and know that you aren't alone. Good luck!
I pray that you are having a wonderful day. I find that when I get dressed up and make an effort to be nice to others, that my day goes better. I notice that when I offer a smile or conversation, it takes the focus off of ME! You need to learn to focus on other positive things....don't dwell on things that you have no control over. Continue to pray and lean on those who care about you. Find that silver lining and know that you aren't alone. Good luck!
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ashleypashley
- Posts: 12
- Joined: Thu Nov 04, 2010 11:42 am
My parents divorced when I was 7. I lived with my dad till I was 15 and then moved in with my mom. Our relationship was awesome. We spent our time giggling and garage saling and eating her awesome cooking. My mom had always had a hard life and was always on the go she worked her tail off and at home she kept the cleanist house. She worked as a bartender for years and therefore was an alcoholic. She went through many bad relationships after my father, including her last one with an extremely abusive man. I witnessed a lot of her getting beat to hell. I'm a very non assertive person and scared to confront anybody or even say no. I have alwsys been some one who feeds off of other peoples happiness that i care about. As i got older and tired of it I started standing up for my mother, i coukdnt handle watching it anymore or seeing her cry, it was like he was doing that to me or worse to see her in agony like that especially when she didnt deserve it. She was a wonderful woman but had her problems. When I was 17 she had a massive stroke that paralyzed her on her right side and left her unable to speak. She has been so very depressed since then and given up on all therapy and often she talks about dying (she has aphasia, she know what she's thinking but can't express herself like you or I could). I just feel like i'll never be able to handle this. She is always miserable and i cant do anything to help her. I know that is her job but I cant handle how sad she is. I know every life has sad things i just feel like i dont know how to handle anything. Will I really get help from this program and be all right and could my mom ever get better? I'm just lost and have no joy
Chin up, I was also in an abusive relationship but I got away, and never looked back, you have so much potential never ever give up on your hopes and dreams, that is not what God has in store for you, Chin up young ladie God is watching us, and while you least expect it love hope, and all you need will come, Take care, and may God be with you. 
ashleypashley,
How long has it been since your mom had the stroke? You have to find it in your mind and body to keep having hope....maybe you can talk to your mom's doctor about her sadness and depression? You know, I don't come on here often enough, but I still do and I noticed some more replies to my previous post. I wanted to post in here an update about my dad. My mom took their puppy to go see him today. When she called me she said her "expectations" were probably too high (I've been coaching her...), b/c she said dad wasn't as happy as she thought he would react. I feel just like you do about your mom. My dad, my mom says, seems down. Of course, I guess if you can't speak or walk who wouldn't right? It's just so hard. I don't have many great things to say to you, just try to keep your spirits up for your mom. I did read that many stroke victims get depressed, rightfully so. Hopefully you can get her to continue therapy. I have to say I feel helpless b/c I don't live close to see him like my siblings do. Take care of yourself. That, I am realizing is so important. I keep telling myself that my dad would and does not want me moping around, crying and living a sad, depressed life you know.
He is doing well with physical therapy and started speech therapy too. I think I would feel a lot more better if we knew he would stay where he's at. But, they only have an extension through next wk and he may have to go somewhere else. what a rollercoaster.
The update on my cousin is that she doesn't need radiation!!! She will need some therapy for her eyes and stuff. That was good news too so there still are good things to look at and hear about with all the bad. Like ladie said, chin up, YES, this program is wonderful for people who are sad, anxious, very negative and feel no hope. There is a guy in the program that say's even when bad stuff happens, there's always something good to find... or something like that. Lots of people across the world are going thru what we are. We have to find a way to rise above the down, negative, and very scary thoughts right now. You can do it. Good luck.
Also, thanks everyone for your encouragement!
How long has it been since your mom had the stroke? You have to find it in your mind and body to keep having hope....maybe you can talk to your mom's doctor about her sadness and depression? You know, I don't come on here often enough, but I still do and I noticed some more replies to my previous post. I wanted to post in here an update about my dad. My mom took their puppy to go see him today. When she called me she said her "expectations" were probably too high (I've been coaching her...), b/c she said dad wasn't as happy as she thought he would react. I feel just like you do about your mom. My dad, my mom says, seems down. Of course, I guess if you can't speak or walk who wouldn't right? It's just so hard. I don't have many great things to say to you, just try to keep your spirits up for your mom. I did read that many stroke victims get depressed, rightfully so. Hopefully you can get her to continue therapy. I have to say I feel helpless b/c I don't live close to see him like my siblings do. Take care of yourself. That, I am realizing is so important. I keep telling myself that my dad would and does not want me moping around, crying and living a sad, depressed life you know.
He is doing well with physical therapy and started speech therapy too. I think I would feel a lot more better if we knew he would stay where he's at. But, they only have an extension through next wk and he may have to go somewhere else. what a rollercoaster.
The update on my cousin is that she doesn't need radiation!!! She will need some therapy for her eyes and stuff. That was good news too so there still are good things to look at and hear about with all the bad. Like ladie said, chin up, YES, this program is wonderful for people who are sad, anxious, very negative and feel no hope. There is a guy in the program that say's even when bad stuff happens, there's always something good to find... or something like that. Lots of people across the world are going thru what we are. We have to find a way to rise above the down, negative, and very scary thoughts right now. You can do it. Good luck.
Also, thanks everyone for your encouragement!