life is good - and it's a long post!

forever young 06 · Post by **forever young 06** » Tue Jun 15, 2010 12:03 am

so good to get back on this site. thought I must be banned from it LOL I enjoy the positive sharing of everyone.

I made it to my small area I had been working toward 12 miles now remember not by myself I have trouble going way out of my comfort zone even with my safe person, but I did it.the thing is he gets carried away and wants to take me other areas I am not ready for here he turns down a side road on this goes down to the lake wait I am not ready you are streching me too far LOL but I made it so we took a good ride I am feeling more positive need more reinforcement will get there though one baby step at a time now to come up with another goal got a lot of territory to cover but recovery is just around the bend.

gosh karma we are hot here in ky too. heat index about the same 100 plus humidity you could cut it with a knife.not a good time for a/c to go out but never is mine is working over time karma a fan would only blow hot air I have one running on the back porch but at night I like to snuggle under the cover feel cozy and safer rock on guys have a good day

manofmusic · Post by **manofmusic** » Thu Jun 17, 2010 12:37 pm

forever young ! - Congratulations on getting out of the comfort zone !!!!!! Maybe next time you could get out at the lake and enjoy the water for a while.

karma ! - 105 degrees ?!?!?!?! I will NEVER complain about 80 degrees again. Although, when it's 40 degrees I'm usually in shorts and sandals. It's a Canadian thing, I guess LOL.

I'm glad that all is well with the lady at work ! Now you can breathe ! LOL

Guess where I went after work......Home Depot ! surprise surprise. I got the step for in front of the back door and the rest of the pavers. It's supposed to go up to 90 here this weekend, so I wanted to get the rest of it down after work today, so I did. All I need to do now is get the plastic paver edging and hammer it into the ground on 2 sides so they don't move around, then get this stuff the resembles sand, but it's stuff that keeps the weeds away from between the pavers. After that I need to mulch around the "pavered" area and get a few small things planted. Then I can finally enjoy the yard. Maybe even get some much needed reading done.

This has been a good week at work. A few jobs were tried out and they ran smooth. I can breathe again LOL.

How has everyone's day been ?

karmaberry1 · Post by **karmaberry1** » Thu Jun 17, 2010 1:35 pm

in my opinion - for what it's worth LOL - work is going great! i'm now doing things that were "removed" from me by "them". it's nice to know i can do the job i used to do! because it's summer, many are off-contract until the last week of july. it's much quieter - yet anincredibly happy place.

lightning or high wind caused my wisteria covered dead magnolia tree to fall tuesday night in the back yard. i didn't notice it when i was putting the boys out yesterday morning. i also didn't notice it when i got home from work and went out to turn on the pool pump. when i did finally notice it - wow! it was almost in the pool. all the wisteria was hanging to the bottom of the pool and gently flowing with the current. it was absolutely beautiful!!!!!! my main concern was if any rotten branches had ripped the liner - nope. or if the concrete was cracked - nope.

i worked like a field hand pulling wisteria out of the pool - cutting it loose from the tree and itself and dragging it to the woods. i worked until dark. there's still a big part of the tree lying across the cement at the deep end and the back part of the cross fence. i'll find someone with a chain saw to come over saturday or sunday. there is still so much wisteria and other vines that have to be cut and dragged off. i'd been working for about an hour when mama came over. she said i needed to hire a man to take care of it. what? i don't think so! LOL

i will say i was beat last night. just washing, drying and putting my hair in curlers was an ordeal HA i didn't do anything out back this afternoon other than vaccuum the pool. then i sat on my back porch with a fan blowing on me to keep the mosquitoes away and chilled - it was hot today but not muggy. it was so nice doing nothing LOL

forever young - how wonderful are you?!?!?! you achieved a goal you set for yourself - i'm so happy for you!!!! you.did.it. that flat out rocks. pat yourself on the back over and over!

i'm looking forward to the weekend. i want to get the front bedroom pretty again. it's become a place for this and that - i'm tired of the clutter! if i get really inspired, i'll take on my home office LOL

party on gang!!!

jillzmind · Post by **jillzmind** » Thu Jun 17, 2010 2:53 pm

Hey guys I do have a triumph to post. I posted upstairs in Jamie/Searunners thread and forgot to come on down here.
The other night last night I got gusty around 11:30pm and asked hubby if he wanted to go on a drive with me. He moaned because he had to get dressed haha but agreed and then I went for it. I drove to church with him which is about 9 miles round trip. I haven't been more than about 4 blocks with him in the car for almost a year. With the exception of last month we went about 5 miles round trip to my nieces grad party. It felt really good. Like I mentioned to Jamie I have a hard time doing things with others around I tend to be a loner alot. I preferr to drive alone and be alone and shop alone etc etc. If and when I act a fool I want it to be a little humiliating as possible. If I could just let myself freak out with others around me then I'd get faster so much quicker but NO I prefer to not make a scene. Call me crazy. Okay don't call me crazy but you know what I mean haha
Anyway I feel awesome about the drive and that was a biggie for me it's only going to get better and better

Jill~

manofmusic · Post by **manofmusic** » Mon Jun 21, 2010 10:35 am

Jill - YOU ROCK !!!!! I noticed the stuff you wrote in the other threads. Awesome !

I went to a bar for the first time in yeeeeeeeears. There was about 12 of us, so I decided to go. Baaaaaaaaaaad move. This was this past Friday. First off, I felt so out of place. Bars have changed since I went, oh let's just say "a few years ago". I woke up Saturday morning having one panic attack after another. I promised my folks that I would take stuff to the dump for them the next day, so I did. I had one panic attack after another on the way to the dump and a bunch more on the way back home. I even had some on Sunday. By the time this morning rolled around, my body was a wreck. I moved like a slug this morning. I got to work and BOOM another attack hit. So, it looks like alcohol's my enemy ! LOL I'm good now. I learned a valuable lesson.......I'm not 21 anymore LOL.

Someone put a bee up one of my co-worker's *** today. He was in such a bad mood and for whatever reason he headed straight for me. He was working on something I did and I forgot to do something on it. No big deal. I did what I forgot to do and it took 10 minutes to cut in. Anyway, he went up one side of me and down the other in front of everyone. I walked up to him, his eyes went as big as dinner plates. I just stared at him. After about 5 seconds, I pointed my finger into his face and I calmly told him to never speak to me like that again. I turned around and walked away. He didn't say a word to me (or anyone) the rest of the day. Inside I was fuming, but outside I tried to look calm.

I got the backyard DONE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well, almost. I have a few things to plant, but 99.9% of the work is done !!!!!!!!!!!

How was everyone's day today ?!?!?!?!?!?!?

karmaberry1 · Post by **karmaberry1** » Mon Jun 21, 2010 11:49 am

congratulations on taking a stand to the bully! empowering yourself was a huge step forward - something you already know. i just don't get the need for someone to brow beat another person? what is the point? how weak does a person have to be in order to do that? i understand justified anger - but to berate someone because you can? what can that man be like outside of a work environment? i wonder if he bullies family members?

question. did you drink at the bar? was your body having an adverse to alcohol? if so at least it's out of there now!

the yard work was probably the best therapy you could have given yourself. i want pictures!!!!! LOL

i was at home depot friday night - then price checked yesterday at lowes. i'm going to need about $200 worth of privacy fencing so the neighbors can't look at me anymore. they are putting in an above ground pool but it's much further back than mine - thankfully! yet i feel/fear they will have company over and our side yards - while wide - aren't wide enough for me. can you say i need a place in the middle of about 100 acres? and yes they bother themselves to look over here with every trip back and forth. i know this because they don't know i'm watching them looking. no i'm NOT parnoid LOL x forever

if i have the courage, i'm going to read a couple of my short stories at the library thursday night - it's poetry reading night and they said they'd love to have me come. i kinda/sorta go blind when i try to speak in front of people. maybe it will be a very small group? anyway, i'm a bit nervous about it yet i want to do it.

today is the summer solstice. i'm getting ready to go outside and enjoy the late afternoon and early evening.

party on!!!!!

manofmusic · Post by **manofmusic** » Tue Jun 22, 2010 2:28 pm

You WILL have the courage to read in front of people ! That's a cool thing to write then read your own stuff to people. How long have you been writing ? That's really cool ! Find the courage. You'll be so glad when you do it. You may even read some more at a later time ! Cool Cool Cool !!!!!!!!

Sounds like you need the privacy fencing. I would do the same thing if I needed to. I'm so fortunate that my neighbours aren't nosey ! I have excellent neighbours. They give me my space ! LOL

Yes I drank at the bar. The beer was going down soooo good. Ever since then, I haven't felt quite right. I haven't been sleeping more than 3 - 4 hours a night. I'm going to bed early tonight in hopes that I can finally get a good night's sleep.

The past few days at work were really weird. I talked about Monday, but today I kept scaring myself. I'd look at a drawing and it looked like I did something really wrong. But looking at it again, it was ok. I did that 3 times today and each time, my blood pressure went through the roof ! I was so tired when I got home. Now I'm replaying the day's events over and over again in my head. I need sleep sooooooo bad !

I'm hoping that tomorrow will be the beginning of a better work day and a better rest of the week.

Hope all went good for you today !

P.S. - the bully was really nice to me today.

karmaberry1 · Post by **karmaberry1** » Tue Jun 22, 2010 2:48 pm

check you messages please?

karmaberry1 · Post by **karmaberry1** » Tue Jun 22, 2010 2:52 pm

well now you've found out your body really doesn't enjoy alcohol. i'm so sorry you feel off. it's not a good feeling!

i've been working in an excel database for the past week and it's wearing me out!!!! i'm going to have to check and recheck everything a 105 times before i turn it in. for whatever reason 105 things seem to be going on - and they're all wrong!!!! it will be a good job when i'm finished - but it's going to be a long time coming in being finished - blast it all!!!!

i hope your tomorrow is better and better!!!

and do check your messages?

manofmusic · Post by **manofmusic** » Wed Jun 23, 2010 11:44 am

Got your message !

I'm not too familiar with Excel. I've used it a few times at work to do check sheets, but the original sheet with the formulas was already set up. Don't get too OCD with Excel ! LOL Remember to breathe once in a while.

I finally got a good night's sleep last night !!! I finally feel rested. I got a full 8 hours and I woke up 5 minutes before the alarm was due to go off. I'm back to myself again. I realized something. I haven't gone for my walk for almost a month now ! I need to start up again ASAP. With the stress from work (and sitting all day) I get tired when I get home. It's not a physical tired, It's a mental tired. It's a tired that only sleep can cure.

The weather is supposed to go up to 90 by the end of the week and with the hunidity it will feel like 100. .......oh boy......I can't wait....(sarcasm)

Work seems to be back to "normal" today. It was one of those days that I go in, do my work and before I know it, it's time to go home. Those are the kind of days I like.

Hope all went well for you today !!!!!!!!!