Help...suggestions?

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Debs33
Posts: 6
Joined: Sun Jan 24, 2010 10:52 am

Post by Debs33 » Sat Jan 30, 2010 4:17 am

I'm new to this site and program. I'm onto session 4. I'm having a hardtime believing that all self esteem issue are anxiety driven. I've been postive most of my life. I lead a healthy life style I work out daily eat healthy watch sugar and caffeine and have had horrible bouts of anxiety on and off since I was 14. I'm now 40. I've never been on medication and never want to. I guess I what I'm saying is I'm a bit skeptical of all of this. I don't feel it's all self esteem attached. Is this what the whole progam is based on? One question is what are some common symptoms before an Attack? I've had an attack when with friends laughing etc.. They just sneak up on you and rob you of any enjoyment and you never know when this may happen. I don't have a pre---warning sign?? With that being said I could also be feeling really good about myself that day. What gives? I've always been a hypocondriac. I hate this about myself and am always living under the "Impending doom" like something bad is going to happen. I've tend to go in and out of this. Right now I've been seeing doctors for dizzyness and off balance/ uncordinated walking issues. So I know I feel particulary worse right now. I'm soo tired of the way I feel. Most of all I believe self esteem is great and healthy but I don't believe it's the main culprit of Anxiety. It's biogical too so with that being said it's not under "ARE" control correct??? Please help me to understand this. I'm tired of my quality of life. Really TIRED....

I'm going through a rough patch right now.

Any suggestion... would be greatly appreciated.

Deb.

Guest

Post by Guest » Sat Jan 30, 2010 7:41 am

Hey Debs,

No you are right it is not all about self-esteem.

There are many more factors to anxiety. For example people don't have panic attacks while driving on the highway because they have low self-esteem. But what the program suggests about self-esteem is that self esteem is not only defined as your view of yourself, but it also encompasses your ability to make yourself feel better, to give yourself assurance that you are o.k.

It deals with you being able to take responsibility for your own happiness, your own peace of mind, and ultimately your own quality of life.

There are some folks whose main issue is self-esteem. There are some who are procrastinators and skeptics because deep down they have fears of failure. So they delay getting things done or don't even try at all. With my own personal battle I can honestly say fear is the main factor. For example fear of taking risks, fear of change, etc.

Some of the pre-panic symptoms I have had are, racing thoughts, hot or cold sweats, cold hands, stuffy nose, spacey feeling, light-headedness, headaches. But they don't always come together.

I also know what you mean about having a really great day and then anxiety sinks in. For me personally I have pinpointed that when that happens to me the thoughts I am having are " I feel great now, but what about later? will this good feeling last? what about tomorrow?"

I remember I felt the same way you did about my quality of life. I use to think, what is wrong and why am I going through this?

Well what helped was doing some fact checking and serious thinking about my life. What is wrong with my quality of life right now? What is my definition of great quality of life? What do I expect my quality of life to be like? What is preventing me from having that quality of life? WHat can I do to get what I want?

Not everything sinks in the first time through the program. I am about the complete the program for the second time. Each lesson I get something different from it that I did not get the first time through.

The program does not sink in completely for everybody. It is a lot of information so don't feel too bad about having skepticism at this point. For example lesson 12 is about secondary gains. The program suggests that we gain something out of feeling anxious and depressed. I said " What in the world am I gaining by having panic attacks?" It didn't make sense to me at all at the time but I kept going through to the next lesson and now that I look back on it anxiety was a great excuse to not go back to school or change jobs for me. Which were two things that affected my quality of life. Now that I am working towards finding a better job and going back to school I feel more in control and responsible for my goal and vision of " a great quality of life"

So I suggest keep going and see what you learn about yourself. If doing things the way you did before got you to this point and as you say you are not completely satisfied, then try something different right :)?

Eddy J

Guest

Post by Guest » Sat Jan 30, 2010 8:56 am

Thanks so much. I appreciate you took the time to answer me. I guess, I have to be patient and really take the program seriously. I feel more anxious actually since beginning the program.

Thank you again. I hope to get better soon!

Guest

Post by Guest » Sun Jan 31, 2010 8:09 am

Hey,

That is completely normal because rather than ignore or run away from fear, you are turning around and facing it. It will cause more anxiety, but see it as excitement too about making some changes that YOU want to make :)

Keep us posted, take care of yourself

Eddy J

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