I can't believe it has been four years since I began my fight to recover from anxiety/panic disorder! I will forever be grateful for the program. It enabled me 3 yrs ago to feel strong enough to get pregnant with my precious son! I never believed I would be strong enough but I overcame!
I'm facing a difficult reality now....I have allowed my anxiety to slowly creep back into my life and now I'm here again. Feeling low, gaining weight, and allowing my panic and anxiety to keep me from living life. How did this happen???? Where do I go from here???
Anyone out there experience this? Where do I start with the program again...i find it hard to think of spending a week again on each skill. Is that the best way to do it the 2nd time around or should I move faster through it?
I'm needing help, encouragement, advice....anyone out there?
Relapse....help
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Guest
Hello The New Me,
Yes, that happens to me at times. What a blessing that you have been free for three years! When that happens to me I have to examine my life and I always find that I have allowed "stress" to creep back in somehow....
Mine comes from not praying and giving my cares to Jesus. When I think I can handle life on my own that is when I get myself in trouble. God did not design us to carry our own burdens...he told us to cast all of our cares on him because he cares for us. When we try to carry our own weight we will always crack under the pressure of it. Pray, Pray, Pray. Draw near to God and he will draw near to you.
Yes, that happens to me at times. What a blessing that you have been free for three years! When that happens to me I have to examine my life and I always find that I have allowed "stress" to creep back in somehow....
Mine comes from not praying and giving my cares to Jesus. When I think I can handle life on my own that is when I get myself in trouble. God did not design us to carry our own burdens...he told us to cast all of our cares on him because he cares for us. When we try to carry our own weight we will always crack under the pressure of it. Pray, Pray, Pray. Draw near to God and he will draw near to you.
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Guest
Hi new me
I think you hit the nail on the head when you said "I have allowed anxiety to creep back into my life again." I find that is my hardest problem too. I have a few good days and end up back to my old ways of thinking and eating. Like a diet that works so well and then we are gaining all the weight back because we never learned to change our lifestyle. Dang it's so hard sometimes ugh! But hey you caught it and you see it , that to me is awesome!! I would just maybe go back and pop in the lessons that spoke to you the most. That's what I do. Like lessons, 3, and 8 and 10. I play those three alot actually. And I listen to my relaxation CD at bedtime to get that relaxtion deep in my stubborn mind haha.
Take care and don't get discouraged. One day at a time okay
Jill~
I think you hit the nail on the head when you said "I have allowed anxiety to creep back into my life again." I find that is my hardest problem too. I have a few good days and end up back to my old ways of thinking and eating. Like a diet that works so well and then we are gaining all the weight back because we never learned to change our lifestyle. Dang it's so hard sometimes ugh! But hey you caught it and you see it , that to me is awesome!! I would just maybe go back and pop in the lessons that spoke to you the most. That's what I do. Like lessons, 3, and 8 and 10. I play those three alot actually. And I listen to my relaxation CD at bedtime to get that relaxtion deep in my stubborn mind haha.
Take care and don't get discouraged. One day at a time okay
Jill~
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Guest
Relapse - been there, done that. I think it is all just part of the process. 
Like jillzmind said, the great part is that you caught it!! My belief here is that there is still some old, negative programming left in your subconscious mind, that likes to rear its ugly head every now and then. Steve (also on this forum) pointed me toward some videos on youtube recently, and I stumbled across this one, which is related:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...ture=player_embedded
It is a different "angle" on reprogramming. CBT, which the program is based on, goes about this reprogramming in a different way.
John
Like jillzmind said, the great part is that you caught it!! My belief here is that there is still some old, negative programming left in your subconscious mind, that likes to rear its ugly head every now and then. Steve (also on this forum) pointed me toward some videos on youtube recently, and I stumbled across this one, which is related:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...ture=player_embedded
It is a different "angle" on reprogramming. CBT, which the program is based on, goes about this reprogramming in a different way.
John
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Guest
Am there, doing that! Yes, it completely and totally sucks to find myself back at struggling to get through a day. Each day, again judged by how high my anxiety was that day. Dreading that I might "get worse". Like you, I have been doing great for the past 4 years. Then I got sick, really sick. And that's when I started letting my fears get the better of me. When will this end? What if it gets worse? For months I talked to myself like that and it took its toll.
The thing is, I see how I got here and, now, I know the road out. Yes, it bites that I have to travel the same path to get out. However, it was an invaluable lesson, too. Never again will I allow anxiety to sneak in the back door like that. I am restarting the program and am looking forward to regaining my happiness.
The thing is, I see how I got here and, now, I know the road out. Yes, it bites that I have to travel the same path to get out. However, it was an invaluable lesson, too. Never again will I allow anxiety to sneak in the back door like that. I am restarting the program and am looking forward to regaining my happiness.
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Guest
the new me....
I am right there with you and Hot Rod. I have been under control for 8 years, went through the program (along with Prozac and Xanax... but completely off Xanax...). I had a major illness last year and it caused me to spiral into depression and anxiety. Used the program again and it helped SOOO much (no increase in meds and had to take Xanax temporarily again and got right off of it)
Now, out of the blue, back on December 15th, I had a panic attack - full blown, tingly, hyperventilating, etc on the way to work. No warning, nothing. Since then, I have been "off" and the anxiety is back as is the depression. I am so worried that I will not be better again, but I remember I've been through this 2 times before and came out fine.
I will pray for you along with myself and hope these horrible feelings go away. It is terrible and please feel free to contact me via PM if you want to talk. (anyone else too.... helps to talk to others who understand!)
Angie
I am right there with you and Hot Rod. I have been under control for 8 years, went through the program (along with Prozac and Xanax... but completely off Xanax...). I had a major illness last year and it caused me to spiral into depression and anxiety. Used the program again and it helped SOOO much (no increase in meds and had to take Xanax temporarily again and got right off of it)
Now, out of the blue, back on December 15th, I had a panic attack - full blown, tingly, hyperventilating, etc on the way to work. No warning, nothing. Since then, I have been "off" and the anxiety is back as is the depression. I am so worried that I will not be better again, but I remember I've been through this 2 times before and came out fine.
I will pray for you along with myself and hope these horrible feelings go away. It is terrible and please feel free to contact me via PM if you want to talk. (anyone else too.... helps to talk to others who understand!)
Angie
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Guest
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Guest
Wow, I think Hot Rod was the one who really inspired me with his recovery story. I am actually glad I'm not alone in relapsing. I mean, I hate that we have all had to deal with our issues again, but I know I'm in good company.
This Christmas I was at my "highest" point... almost 5 years out of my onset of panic attacks and feeling so good I was actually eating whatever I wanted (which was bad) and drinking caffiene. Then about a week ago I had a mini panic attack. It caught me so off guard I almost didn't remember what that feeling was and I thought I was stroking out or something.
Every day since then I've had heart palpatations and they're freaking me out. Logically I know I'll be okay, but that negative voice in my head keeps telling me that I'm going to end up having a heart attack.
I love you all so much. I don't think I could have made it through this far without you. This is a great community!
Sandina
This Christmas I was at my "highest" point... almost 5 years out of my onset of panic attacks and feeling so good I was actually eating whatever I wanted (which was bad) and drinking caffiene. Then about a week ago I had a mini panic attack. It caught me so off guard I almost didn't remember what that feeling was and I thought I was stroking out or something.
Every day since then I've had heart palpatations and they're freaking me out. Logically I know I'll be okay, but that negative voice in my head keeps telling me that I'm going to end up having a heart attack.
I love you all so much. I don't think I could have made it through this far without you. This is a great community!
Sandina
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Guest
Sandina,
I am going through the same thing. I hadn't thought about panic for over 6 months then I had a pretty big panic attack "out of the blue". I know that I must have been letting stress and worry get into my mind, however it felt like the panic attack came out of nowhere. Now I am questioning...was it really a panic attack? WHAT IF something is really wrong with me, but I am blowing it off as a panic attack. I can't believe I am here again. I am starting to listen to my CDs all over again, but I am ready to be done with this!
I am going through the same thing. I hadn't thought about panic for over 6 months then I had a pretty big panic attack "out of the blue". I know that I must have been letting stress and worry get into my mind, however it felt like the panic attack came out of nowhere. Now I am questioning...was it really a panic attack? WHAT IF something is really wrong with me, but I am blowing it off as a panic attack. I can't believe I am here again. I am starting to listen to my CDs all over again, but I am ready to be done with this!
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Guest
sawdyj and Sandina,
I relapsed as well and I think it was due to the same things you did - started drinking caffeine whenever I wanted, ate crappily (can't remember the last fruit/veggie I had).
I had an "out of the blue" panic attack on December 15th and it's snowballed since then. (Nothing emotionally triggered this, by the way) Went into a rough depression for a few days thinking I'd never feel better. Then I started the program again and I'm up to lesson 2 now - doing the homework, listening to the relaxation tape...
Just an FYI, I have been taking Prozac for 9 years (started with VERY small dosage and increased from time to time and STILL on small dose). When this panic started, I worried that the Prozac was not working anymore. Since the 15th, I've had to take a small amount of xanax once a day just to calm my nerves enough to get to work - and then I feel guilty about that!)
I am so glad that I have found this board and reading all your stories LESSENS my anxiety.
Thank you all - anyone feel free to PM me to talk. It's great when you have someone who has "been there, done that .... still going through it...)
Angie
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Phil 4:13
I relapsed as well and I think it was due to the same things you did - started drinking caffeine whenever I wanted, ate crappily (can't remember the last fruit/veggie I had).
I had an "out of the blue" panic attack on December 15th and it's snowballed since then. (Nothing emotionally triggered this, by the way) Went into a rough depression for a few days thinking I'd never feel better. Then I started the program again and I'm up to lesson 2 now - doing the homework, listening to the relaxation tape...
Just an FYI, I have been taking Prozac for 9 years (started with VERY small dosage and increased from time to time and STILL on small dose). When this panic started, I worried that the Prozac was not working anymore. Since the 15th, I've had to take a small amount of xanax once a day just to calm my nerves enough to get to work - and then I feel guilty about that!)
I am so glad that I have found this board and reading all your stories LESSENS my anxiety.
Thank you all - anyone feel free to PM me to talk. It's great when you have someone who has "been there, done that .... still going through it...)
Angie
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Phil 4:13