i'm just lost

india_6 · Post by **india_6** » Thu Jul 31, 2008 6:06 am

i have been doing the program and i've seen a lot of improvement. i had semi done the program before, but stopped once i felt better. so this is my second go-round with the sessions. like i said i am improving, and i am doing well. i haven't taken xanax for almost two weeks, and i've calmed myself down before my panic escalates to a full blown attack. i have no complaints. however, i have noticed lately that i am feeling very isolated. not sad or anything, just an eery quietness about me. i seem to have shut myself off or something. it's hard to explain, i just feel very alone and introverted in many ways. as i said, i don't feel sad, if anything it's like a quiet anger. not anger towards anyone or anything, it's just the closest feeling to what i am experiencing. i find myself bothered by talking and don't want to be around people. not because it makes me nervous, if anything being around people has the opposite affect. but now i just feel different. i don't really know what's going on.i don't know what exactly i'm asking here, maybe just venting. but if you have any thoughts or experiences on the matter, i would appreciate feedback. thank you

carla_renee_12719 · Post by **carla_renee_12719** » Thu Jul 31, 2008 6:32 am

I understand your feelings. I feel lost too. I moved to a new state and have no family or friends here. I had not been depressed in a long time..maybe you feel that way too.

FunnyGuy · Post by **FunnyGuy** » Thu Jul 31, 2008 7:04 am

I moved to a different town. Things seem pretty hard.Being lonely and trying to stay busy just is n't really working.I can relate.

proudmomof2 · Post by **proudmomof2** » Thu Jul 31, 2008 7:15 am

I wouldn't neccesarily look at it as a bad thing. Maybe it is just a period of reflection you are going through. Now that your mind is getting clearer, you can think about all the things you couldn't before. Some alone time is actually good for you. I try to get some every week. Think of it as time to tend to yourself. Just don't let it become the only time you spend. Keep your friends, have fun, enjoy life.

proudmomof2 · Post by **proudmomof2** » Thu Jul 31, 2008 7:17 am

Try looking at moving as a fresh start. I have often wanted to just pull out a map, close my eyes, and point and then go there and start over. It used to be because I wanted to run from my problems and I like the idea of starting over where no one knew me and I could be whomever I wanted to be. Now, I still have that dream, but it is for a different reason. For fun and excitement. Try getting out and exploring your new surroundings. Look at your local government website. They often list community events, clubs, etc. Don't isolate yourself. Put yourself out there and you will make new friends.

Mary Wargo · Post by **Mary Wargo** » Thu Jul 31, 2008 8:16 am

India6 -- I'm not sure how far you had gotten on the sessions before you stopped but when I had gotten to session 4 and my anxiety had decreased significantly I started feeling quite strange. Just like you described - kind of an eery quietness. At first I thought I was getting depressed but then realized that living without all the adrenaline induced anxiety was a whole different way of feeling. I felt like I was forming a new identity and actually felt uncomfortable. Consequently I have finished the program 3 times now in a row and have adjusted to this calmer way of being. I also saw that I didn't need to be around a lot of noise and people anymore just to distract myself. When I see people now it's because I want to spend time with someone, not just as a distraction from my own anxious thoughts. I'm sure you'll work thru this adjustment period as you finish the program.

india_6 · Post by **india_6** » Thu Jul 31, 2008 9:15 am

thank you all for your responses. Mary, it is so strange you said that, lol, i am on session four now. and i was thinking about it after i posted the first part, maybe it is the alone time i was always afraid of and now i can handle. i was just saying to someone yesterday in chat to use their alone time, not to be afraid and let your mind wonder, but to relax and get to know YOURSELF. thank you again for your responses it made me feel a lot better. and i do enjoy the alone time, just found it to be a strange change of pace. best wishes to all