letting go and moving on..

Crystal Lynn · Post by **Crystal Lynn** » Mon Dec 07, 2009 3:59 am

accepting my past and letting go is probably the most difficult part for me.. ecspecially while beginning this program. I feel like I have no control. I have let my past and my fears take the driver's seat for a long time.. it scares me so much. I just want the negativity and judging to die down. and lately I've been having really sick, scary thoughts. I don't agree with them and I would never act on most of them but I just don't understand.. I can't seem to focus in on the program. I was supposed to start session 2 yesterday?? Help!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Dec 07, 2009 5:15 am

I have went through those thoughts in the beginning stage. The thoughts are very real and scary! Are you spiritual?

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Dec 07, 2009 5:16 am

Also, I just started my program today. I've had this problem since July. I had surgery and came out VERY diff. I can help you get through those thoughts... I had the SAME ones!!!!!!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Dec 08, 2009 2:40 pm

Ohhhh...I can soooo relate!! After an emotional and physical abusive childhood and then an emotional abusive marriage...which ended three years ago...but the emotional abuse continued up until a few weeks ago...I had tried advice from family, friends, therapists, and meds...nothing worked cause I didnt realize what the root of the problem was.

It took my son leaving for the Navy without wanting to see me or even say good-bye...for me to realize that something in me had to change.

Within days of him leaving, I had my "ah ha" moment and realized that my childhood and continued issues in my adulthood caught up with me AND SLAMMED me to the floor with a rush of uncontrollable anxiety and depression. The meds made my anxiety worse...I actually had more anxiety about the side affects of the meds than my symptoms without it. The warning that this medication could increase the risk of suicide....made me go into a panic attack within a few days of starting the meds. My attack was crying uncontrollably..thinking to myself...I'm not suicidal...but this medication is GOING TO MAKE ME DO IT!! WOW SCAREEEEYYY!!

My honey told me to go to bed so the sleep would shut off my brain and I could calm down and stop over analyzing the moment. The next morning, i flushed the meds down the toilet!!

Then I obsessed for a few days thinking....NOW WHAT!! WHY CANT I FIND SOMETHING THAT WORKS, SOMETHING TO FIX ME!!

Then I saw the infomercial one morning while I was getting ready for work. After listening to the testimonials....6 of those people had the same issues that I did!!! I immediately got on the phone and just wanted the info disk. But after the warm caring conversation I had with the rep...I agreed to try the program for the 30 days. I NEVER buy things off TV...always thought things like this were a scam. I knew in my heart....that this HAD TO WORK!!

I am on Session two, getting ready to move on to Session three. I am in the process of testing what I have learned by how I handle situations that keep coming up.

Although I still feel the anxiety (for now) about those situations....I am using the breathing and self talk and reading my book and using the cards as often as I have too to keep my self calm.

Amazingly...these issues are starting to shrink in importance and how they affect my emotions. The relaxation CD helps..I just need to be more committed to actually making myself STOP what I'm doing and do it.

Cutting back on the caffeine and the sweets and using the treadmill at work during lunch is helping too.

Looking forward to continued progress and success. Looking forward to "putting the load down" and walking into my new bright future as the person God meant for me to be. =-).

And yes....I am keeping the program!!!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Dec 09, 2009 2:02 pm

Originally posted by Believeinmyself:
Ohhhh...I can soooo relate!! After an emotional and physical abusive childhood and then an emotional abusive marriage...which ended three years ago...but the emotional abuse continued up until a few weeks ago...I had tried advice from family, friends, therapists, and meds...nothing worked cause I didnt realize what the root of the problem was.

It took my son leaving for the Navy without wanting to see me or even say good-bye...for me to realize that something in me had to change.

Within days of him leaving, I had my "ah ha" moment and realized that my childhood and continued issues in my adulthood caught up with me AND SLAMMED me to the floor with a rush of uncontrollable anxiety and depression. The meds made my anxiety worse...I actually had more anxiety about the side affects of the meds than my symptoms without it. The warning that this medication could increase the risk of suicide....made me go into a panic attack within a few days of starting the meds. My attack was crying uncontrollably..thinking to myself...I'm not suicidal...but this medication is GOING TO MAKE ME DO IT!! WOW SCAREEEEYYY!!

My honey told me to go to bed so the sleep would shut off my brain and I could calm down and stop over analyzing the moment. The next morning, i flushed the meds down the toilet!!

Then I obsessed for a few days thinking....NOW WHAT!! WHY CANT I FIND SOMETHING THAT WORKS, SOMETHING TO FIX ME!!

Then I saw the infomercial one morning while I was getting ready for work. After listening to the testimonials....6 of those people had the same issues that I did!!! I immediately got on the phone and just wanted the info disk. But after the warm caring conversation I had with the rep...I agreed to try the program for the 30 days. I NEVER buy things off TV...always thought things like this were a scam. I knew in my heart....that this HAD TO WORK!!

I am on Session two, getting ready to move on to Session three. I am in the process of testing what I have learned by how I handle situations that keep coming up.

Although I still feel the anxiety (for now) about those situations....I am using the breathing and self talk and reading my book and using the cards as often as I have too to keep my self calm.

Amazingly...these issues are starting to shrink in importance and how they affect my emotions. The relaxation CD helps..I just need to be more committed to actually making myself STOP what I'm doing and do it.

Cutting back on the caffeine and the sweets and using the treadmill at work during lunch is helping too.

Looking forward to continued progress and success. Looking forward to "putting the load down" and walking into my new bright future as the person God meant for me to be. =-).

And yes....I am keeping the program!!!

Thanks for your input.. attitude IS everything, and you certainly seem to be on the right track. I started Session 2 on Monday.. looking forward to "putting the load down" as well. Keep me posted! I'm here to support as well as gain the support I need. God bless..

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Fri Dec 11, 2009 5:20 am

Amen to that!! Stay strong!!