I need advice

[Aesiamoon]

I received the program and I've been trying my best to use it. Unfortunately, I received the program when my life got turned upside down. My husband basically dropped a bomb on me that he is done caring, my anxiety and depression is too much for him to handle. My husband and I have been together for 12 years, married 4 almost 5 years. He has always had a drinking problem. I stayed with him through everything, all the pain and hurt he put on me and now he is just DONE. I'm floored and hurt and I'm trying to make myself better but it's really hard with this going on. On top of that we have a 4 year old daughter that I am the main caregiver for. He works nights and has recently made a friend he's been talking to whom is girl. I'm trying to center myself, work on me, and it is just sooo hard right now.Any advice on how to try and move past this and work on me? I want so much to fix me, with or without him, but he is controlling my brain right now. -Nina

[lucy knepp]

Hello Nina

Stay with the Cd's and workbook but most of all these forums and chat. It really helps. I am surprised also to see how many people (men and women) are going through emotional changes due to divorce or breakups. Some have deaths in the family, cancer or illness, or just depression and anxiety which is generalized. Don't isolate yourself. Get around people...church or whatever. Stay positive. Now especially you should surround yourself with some positive people and influences. Don't stop listening to friends who need to talk but don't let their depression bring you down.....give advice but stay strong. Read the quotes Mark sends good ones on here.
There are a lot of good ppl here. Open up and come into the mini chat. Give a try.
Lucy Knepp

[tina martin]

Welcome, Nina. You've come to the right place: good program, good people. It is time to take your life into your own hands, esp. for the sake of your little girl. The fellas love to think they have this great power over us. Well, they don't, necessarily. It's a pleasure to prove it to them.

Start the program, meet it half way by giving it the time and attention it requires and you may just turn your life around. Your little girl will sense the change in you and that's worth everything isn't it? We'll try and support you as best we can. Don't expect overnight changes. It took time to develop your issues; it will take patience, persistence and tenacity to reverse them. Change will come. Best to you.

[missyrachy]

I hate to say it but it sounds like you are better off. Listen to the advice of others that you should stay with the program. Just keep pushing yourself thru! This is when you'll need it most. It will teach you coping skills to get thru all of the pain, depression and anxiety. You are strong and will make it thru this. I wish my guy would LEAVE ME

[Aesiamoon]

Thanks everyone for your responses and support. I haven't been on here in awhile bc my life has been in limbo, from one moment to the next. The hardest part is waking up, not in my home, and not with him. But as each day goes by, I am starting to realize, I am probably better off, and so is my daughter. I'm not blaming all of my anxiety and depression on him. I have had depression in the past. It runs in my family, but he didn't help. His drinking and isolation away from me mentally and emotionally has wreaked havoc on me. A lot of it IS his fault, and i'm sure a lot of it WILL go away now that I am away from him. It will take time. It still hurts. It hurts the worst when I see my little one hurt. But I will prove to myself that I CAN and WILL do this, to better myself so I can be better for her as well. Thanks again all!~

[Iwillbebetter]

Nina - i'm sorry to hear of your situation. I know how hard that can be. Everyone has offered you great advise, as you know I can only agree with what has already been said.