Agoraphobia

[Velspar]

I tried to go to the mall yesterday, but only got in so many feet anf started to panic. I feel very overwhelmed as soon as I get inside the place and see how big it is and all the peoples everywhere. I feel like if I stay insode for very long I start to feel panic and anxiety and have to get out. But if I leave I feel then very bad about myself like I failed.

I also have troubles getting inside other public place like grocery store though I can get shopping done. But sometime I feel very very bad in back of store and is relief to get away you know? I don't have no problems with driving really. I go to conveneince store and always do good because i can get in and out so no problems. But it is the big places like the malls I con not go. Do any of you have the same problems? Thank you.

[Flyer99]

Hi Velspar. Yes, to an extent I have the same problem. It used to be much worse. I had it so bad I couldn't even leave my house. But with time and patience and practice I can now go into almost any store and even wait in a long line at the checkout. Some days are better than others so I choose the days I want to go. If I am really stressed I don't bother going to the large stores like Walmart. I took it day by day and practiced. I would just drive to the store and go in the front door and then back out - that was my goal. Then the next time I would go in and stay 5 minutes and come out. The next time I would take a cart and walk up an aisle and come out. Eventually over many weeks I was able to go into the huge store and take my time and look around, buy something and go home. Even try going in and buying something right at the checkout and leave. That is a start. The key is not to rush it. Take little steps and practice. have patience and you will succeed. Good luck!

[Nanner823]

Hi Velspar,

I do the same thing. I am worse in big stores, and malls. Little steps is really key and or have someone go with you a few times. I am working up to bigger better things but as of now I stick to smaller stores. I know how you feel though, it gets easier as you do it more. I am telling everyone so far that if you ever need to talk I have a facebook, its linked to my profile on here. I am always on and willing to chat it helps a lot to talk I noticed. I also feel better with a little ego boost, someone encouraging me.

Don't get down on yourself. At one point I couldn't even go on my porch, it gets easier.
Nanette

[LyndaLu]

I am surprised that more is not written here about agoraphobia.
I have been unemployed for a long while now and the longer I
am alone and in my apartment the worse my agoraphobia gets.
I never had it before I lost my job, but now that I am not working
I have no reason to leave my apartment. I did not realize until
just recently that I was so agoraphobic, that I did not care to leave
my apartment unless I had to.

Before having my psychiatric problems I
was very independent and did all sorts of things by myself,
I traveled in-state and out-of-state and I went to the movie
theatre alone and I went to coffee houses to read my books
alone. I had no problem with being alone and doing things alone.
I was content and seemed happy with it.

Now I am the total
opposite of that. I went to a coffee house the other day to
have a hot drink and to read my book and it felt so wierd that I
was actually there. I tried to enjoy my drink and my book and
the music that was playing on the overhead speakers. When I
grocery shop I just go in to the store, get what I need as quick
as I can, and then leave. I went to Target ONE DAY and bought
one thing and then got out of there. I like to do anything by
DRIVE THRU WINDOWS. I can order fast food, go to my pharmacy,
mail a letter, go to the bank .... and all without leaving my
vehicle. Well, that is all I have to say about agoraphobia for now.
Lynda

[pearpickinporky]

Lynda I am noticing the same with myself, Being unemployed really effects my agoraphobia, I have little reason to leave the house and everything can be done online these days from groceries to banking, I do force myself to go to the local store each morning just to pick up a news paper but other than that I rarely venture outside my comfort zone but when I do I have a panic attack (see my post about last night)

[LyndaLu]

Dear PPP: Funny you should mention online grocery delivery !

I used to have my groceries delivered all of the time ! I did not know that
anyone else knew about that. I always used the excuse that I was ordering
my groceries to be delivered because of my arthritis and that some
of the real heavy grocery items would be too heavy for me to lift !
Of course that was just an excusefor me not to leave the house. Wow.
I don't order groceries online anymore because, unfortunately, I am on
"food stamps" now and you cannot use the food stamp "debit-type" card
for online grocery deliveries ( to my knowledge). Now I HAVE to go to the
grocery store ( and I hate it of course, but I must face my fears and go anyhow ).

[pearpickinporky]

Lynda I hate the grocery store, its always so damn crowded and I've found it brings out the worst in people, they are so damn rude and would mow you down with their trolleys, I save myself the stress and do it online, I'm in Ireland and we get paid our benefits in cash so no need for food stamps etc.

[LyndaLu]

You are in Ireland, WOW !
Well, you should try to go to the grocery store once a month just
to get the exposure to it. Then maybe go up to once a week. Try talking
to other patrons and maybe even talk a bit to the cashiers.
There ARE nice folks out there just waiting to be found !
Lynda

[Iwillbebetter]

I just wanted to add to velspar in addition to the wonderful ways of handling going to the store, I really like flyer99 way of doing it step by step. But don't forget to be proud of yourself for what you do accomplish. You got to the mall and made it only a few feet before panic.... YOU GOT TO THE MALL AND MADE IT A FEW FEET!! Although you did have panic you did it, you were in the mall.

It's not the speed, but the direction that counts!! sometimes although it takes longer babysteps are the only way to go!!