New and really need some advice....

NyGirl7 · Post by **NyGirl7** » Fri May 09, 2008 3:55 am

Hey all, Im new here! I just recieved my program in the mail and so far, it seems to be helpful already...I've always had a terrable fear of doctors, any kind, gyno, physician, dentist etc...Im a 32 year old female, and had never been to the gynecologist, and have had maybe ONE physical in my life except when my mom would take me when I was little. So, in January, I decided to bite the bullet and face my fears, the only things was, it took a while to get appointments, and with the type of person I am, time in between only gives me more time to feel and think very morbidly, so long story short for about 2 whole months in between getting appts and waitng for results (got checked and tested for basically everything)I got more and more scared and freaked out, actually throwing up from nerves, fron cinvincing myself in my mind that I was some serious illness, etc...Everything turned out great! (Thank god) BUT after that, I thought it would be over and I'd stop worrying, but I didn't...I started to worry about my heart, my lungs, breathing, I became obsessed, and oddly kept going back and forth to different doctors, it's funny because I couldn't go at all, then I couldn't stop going...but, that also faded, and now Im fine. BUT now Im feeling these disembodied feelings, I feel like Im not real sometimes, and my world around me isn't real, and Im asking myself really disturbing questions like, who am I, what am I, why am I hear etc. My therapist says it's called depersonalization, but Im starting to feel like a complete freak!! It's feels as though it will never pass...the thing is about 6 years ago I had a bout with this before, I had alot going on in my life and all of a suddon I had these "floating" feeling etc. I cou;lcn't even drive. It lasted 3 months and then just went away, but back then, I didn't know what it was so am more calm about it now, but does anyone else feel this way? I feel like I'm all alone with this, if anyone h=can understand this feeling, please share your thoughts.

Thanx in advance!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Fri May 09, 2008 6:23 am

No one has posted a response to you. It is now May, so how are you feeling? How have you been doing with the program?
No, you are not alone. I'm not much of a talker, but I will respond if your email.

derfy · Post by **derfy** » Fri May 09, 2008 7:05 am

Hi, I am pretty new to the program too. My biggest fear is doctors. Care to chat more on that?

Zoogirl · Post by **Zoogirl** » Fri May 09, 2008 7:19 am

Yes, my fear is the Doctors giving me meds that I don't need. Going into the office and hearing bad news. Going in just to hear the Doctor said I don't know what you have so we are sending you to have tests.
I have actually had this happen, so I fear it will happen over and over again, and they still don't find anything wrong with me, but I have this long list of symptoms. So if I don't go I won't hear the answers.
Kind of like taking your car into the shop and the sound your car is making daily does not make a sound in front of the mechanic.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Fri May 09, 2008 7:57 am

It took me years to even go to a doctor. I was 100 percent sure they were going to tell me something bad, so I avoided it totally. I just got married 8 months ago, and want to have a baby within the next year or so, so I just had to face that fear, espcially with the obgyn. It all worked out though, and all my fears were a waste of time and energy. But after I got over that, the odd non reality feelings started to come on, I went through about 2 months of hell from the waiting part, and I believe this is the outcome but I really hope this goes away soon, it's really disturbing...

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon May 12, 2008 4:21 am

I know what you mean, the saying
no news is good news, does not work for us....
Are you looking forward to having kids???
I love my kids, they are worth the doctor trouble.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon May 12, 2008 4:49 am

Hi NyGirl7. I totally understand about freaking out about going to the doctor. I have always gone for physicals and regular yearly Ob/gyn appts. Its now that as i approach 40 in a few years that i get nervous about test results... heart, lungs, breast, brain, and other crap. I get nervous the very beginning of the appt. when getting my blood pressure and temperature. I start sweating and my heart starts racing even before the doctor comes in. You have to calm down and only go within the required time. We can make up so much stuff in our mind. It's called Hypercondriac(spelling wrong)

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon May 12, 2008 5:11 am

I understand, I continue a low anxiety state until the test results return, keeping possible results in the back of my mind, for weeks at a time.