Struggling with Perfection
I think the hardest thing I deal with is being perfect. I have such anxiety about not being perfect. If I do something stupid I feel so awful and it stays with me for years. I am so sure that if I am not perfect all the time people will not like me. I just never feel like I'll ever be good enought. It makes it so hard to be around people. I am so afraid that I will screw up. But then when I am home I'm just as miserable if not more because I like being around people. I try to tell myself that people aren't going to like hate me if I screw up but I cannot seem to convince myself that. Does anyone else struggle with perfection? How do you handle it?
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Guest
Yes, I struggle with perfectionism. I mainly have this at work – I’m beyond scared to mess something up and have one of my clients angry or disappointed in me. It’s almost too difficult to fathom having an authority figure at work (like my boss) mad at me. The way I have been working on it, is I try to honestly assess the situation. If I’m really unsure of something I’ll ask so that always calms me. I also try to think about it logically. Mistakes happen, and you can learn from them, so usually if I make a mistake I’ll learn from it and realize that I won’t be fired. I’m human. It is scary to be concerned about messing up in front of people, but take comfort knowing that everyone has that concern. If you’re in a social situation, just become immersed in other people. Ask them about their jobs, their homes, their pets, anything! I’ve learned that people love to talk about themselves and tell stories about experiences, so if you’re really nervous, just keep the focus on other people by initiating questions they can answer and then when you feel comfortable with a topic or discussion, join in!