no more anxiety...but oh the depression???

Mom of 6 · Post by **Mom of 6** » Sat Jan 12, 2008 6:38 am

I'm sure I've seen other posts on this, I guess what I'm looking for is reassurance and advice on how to deal with it.
I have had a break through with anxiety

I still have bouts with it, however I've learned to cope and work my way through my anxious episodes..and it feels great!!! But now it's depression??? does that make sense? Part of me is thinking that perhaps it's a "stillness" that I haven't had in quite some time, and I'm mistaking it for feeling depressed??? There isn't any particular reason for feeling "sad", I can't figure it out! Has anyone felt this way? any suggestions? Geeze, if it isn't one thing, it's another..LOL..
Robin

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Jan 12, 2008 9:21 am

Yes, I've had that feeling. We begin to think that we should always feel anxious and if we don't feel that way, we feel bored and that might be why you feel you might be depressed. Enjoy the quiet and read or catch up on something that you have been putting off. You are actually feeling relaxed and calm. Good job!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Jan 12, 2008 10:11 am

Dear Robin,

Having recovered fr anxiety, I am currently experiencing what my therapist calls CIRCUMSTANTIONAL DEPRESSION. This is the 1st time in my life(39 yrs old, turnin 21 next bday

)I have ever had depression. Anyhows, in my case depression is the CUMULATIVE RESULT of the past 3 YEARS = 20 mths of intensive therapy when anxiety disorder 1st triggered: condensing 20+ yrs of some pretty bad & traumatic stuff - into 20 MTHS (fr childhood forward)feeling & facing it all, facing myself & changing those parts of me that creat anxiety disorder, the PROGRAM, being home & not working for 3 yrs NOW, TO RECOVER,- to name a few. Thats a lot. I've had to face/feel/aknowledge/accept a great deal of things. LOL, I call it an "emotional exorcism" & "shedding of old skin".

Sweetie, the process of experiencing all things anxiety disorder & recovery - in & of itself can produce depression. Anxiety disorder is tiring. Recovery is hard - it is hard fought, it takes time - therefore, a natural occurence is depression. Think of it as cause & effect.

Finally, I know for me - I am still getting used to being recovered. Sure, anxiety disorder didn't trigger(physical symptoms) till 2005. However, I clearly remember the personality traits of it as far back as 5. That is a longgggggggggggggg timeeeeeeeeeee of PRACTICE, LOL. I am getting used to the totality of changes - relaxation, personality changes, etc.

Girl, pat yourself on the back - you are doing it - you have a grip on anxiety. That tells me you're 1 tough cookie. Use the same skill to address any depression you may be feeling. Continue the pos self talk, pampering yourself & loving yourself. I know you're busy w/ the children. Try to make time for you - even a 10 min bubble bath. Heck, even if you're home & taking care of the twins, blow dry your hair pretty FOR YOU - put on some perfume - celebrate your a woman(we are the stronger of the sexes, lol - joking guys). We sometimes get caught up in taking care of everyone else - that we forget about us.

Remember sweetie, you are so worth it. Celebrate girl, you are doing it.

God Bless,

Lenore

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Jan 12, 2008 11:06 am

You may have clinical depression, and a mild anti-depressant could help. Maybe talk to your doctor about it. GOod luck! Bev

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Jan 12, 2008 12:13 pm

I have many times experienced depression intermitantly with anxiety or right after a period of time of anxiety. Anxiety is hard on the body...think about how many times its been revved up. As a natural balancing I think its very NORMAL to feel depressed afterwards.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Jan 12, 2008 3:19 pm

Robin, Wow, I needed your post. I am also suffering a period of depression. Not just sadness but depression. Much different. Even when suffering the anxiety, I could laugh at myself and my situation. This is not the case now. I am hopeful I will work through this as I did the anxiety too. I am open to any suggestions too. Hang in there. If we beat the anxiety, we can beat this too! And truly all of us on this site that have overcome the anxiety are very determined, intelligent, strong individuals. We must remember that!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu Jan 17, 2008 6:17 am

WOW! This is incredible. I have suffered with SEVERE panic attacks, agoraphobia, and generalized anxiety for 30 years and recently, like only the past few months, my anxiety has lessed SIGNIFICANTLY since beginning the program. I have done things I NEVER would have thought I could have done.

But now..oh my god. I am feeling SO depressed, it scares the hell out of me at times. I've never experienced depression (to my knowledge) in my life (I'm 41) even when my anxiety was at it's very worst. I'm not talking sadness, although for sure that too, but incredible downright .. "I-don't-think-I-can-make-it-through-this-another-moment" depression.

A couple of days ago I ended a relationship that I was in because I couldn't stand feeling so awful in it, and I'm sure .. blamed my unhappiness and depression on us not be compatible and trying to make the relationship work and now, it's gone and I realize..my life STILL sucks. I'm still depressed. And very scared of this new feeling.

I spoke to him this morning. I'm so confused. I don't know if I should have left or not. I've been sitting on the fence in this relationship for a year now..torturing myself with staying or leaving but now that it is all over with, I know I am not better off. The next man won't have some of THIS guys problems but he WILL have some. Many more perhaps.

I feel awful. Just awful. But, I don't know if it is because I am in an unhappy relationship forcing myself to make it work, or if I can't make my relationship work cause I am depressed!

Danielle

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu Jan 17, 2008 7:44 am

I think we are all having to deal with the side effects of recovery as weird as that sounds! I had more depression than anxiety, but started developing anger episodes as I worked through the first 5 sessions and my depression! I firmly believe that there is a light at the end of the tunnel (which breaks us into the full light of day!) for each of us though!

Hang in there Mom of 6! Maybe the depression (or in my case, anger) is a result of that missing piece (and a bad piece at that!) of our lives that we are successfully getting rid of! We just haven't figured out how to readjust our minds around normalcy yet!

Serenity66 - bless your heart! It really and truly sounds like you at least did the right thing for this moment. You really, really need to take this time for YOU....to figure out how to improve your life and to love yourself. Then, later on - be it with this guy or another, you will be secure in yourself and your abilities, coping skills, etc. to sufficiently handle the unique circumstances that he will bring into your life. *hugs, sweetie!*

Best wishes,
Dawn

Gman5256 · Post by **Gman5256** » Thu Jan 17, 2008 8:16 am

Me too! Me too! I've been doing so well with handling the anxiety so I started to slowly (with Dr's help) come off the Effexor thinking 'hey, I can handle this!', then in tandem with my period came a bout of depression I haven't felt in a long time.

You're right, it's more than sadness - for me, it's complete apathy. I can't do anything, care about anything, see anything, be anything. It sucks. I've given myself a little reminder card for when I go through it - like the anxiety six steps and we'll see if that helps. For now, I've put my meds back at one every second day and I'm just focused on continuing to learn and getting better.

If it weren't hard, it wouldn't be worth it, would it?

Ronda

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu Jan 17, 2008 9:23 am

I wouldn't assume you have clinicial depression like a response from up above; It does seem logical that anxiety causes some depression. That cause & effect method really makes sense to me. Somewhere in the workbook it says if you can recall that the anxiety preceeded the depression then you have a good idea of where it's coming from and if we fix the initial problem (anxiety and bad habit thinking) then the depression will lessen up, too.
I don't like those down feelings, but I do agree we are supposed to treat them just like anxious feelings with the same self-talk/compassionate talk. My problem lately is still wondering how I'm "supposed to feel". The expectations are where I'm working now. Tough stuff, but worth it. What other choice do we have?
Best wishes to you. I have a strong feeling that you'll figure out some key ways to deal with these feelings, too. They're just feelings and aren't too truthful.