Feeling axious husband going to Canada!
Hello everyone!My husband is leaving to go on a fishing trip to Canada for 9 days.He's leaving this Friday!I have high anxiety and panick attacks.As the days drawl nearer I'm starting to have a lot of negative what-ifs.He goes out of town here and there and I usually handle it pretty good but I always feel on high alert.In other words I feel pretty uncomfortable the whole time he's gone.I've never had to deal with 9 days though with him that far away and with not being able to call him.I'm scared!I've been making pretty good progress and don't want to this to throw me into another downward spiral.To tell you the truth my husband is of know support and he lies to me all the time and is verbally abusive.My problem is self doubt!The minute that I open my mind to that Wham!in comes all the panick!Is there anyone who can help lift me and help me put some positive statements to focus on?Thank you guys for any help!
Hi Fear Not,
A few years ago my spouse had to go to Belgium on a business trip when my anxiety was at it's worst. I felt like the rug had been pulled from under me and was scared. But I found a gift in this where I realized I didn't need her here to feed me, or to really take care of me- I could take care of me. And that's the truth for each of us- we always take care of ourselves.
I'm sorry your husband is abusive as you describe. Perhaps this is a vacation for you then? I am confident that this 9 days will allow you to deepen your self-understanding and will make you stronger. The opportunity in this is to see that you are your own safe person and that you have your own options to play with in life.
It did help me to have this website back then. Maybe you could keep a forum going each day to discuss your days while he is gone and your impressions of things. You could set goals for you to reach each day and share them with people. Do you have family/friends nearby you could see or call? That helped me quite a lot. You'll do great- I just know it!
A few years ago my spouse had to go to Belgium on a business trip when my anxiety was at it's worst. I felt like the rug had been pulled from under me and was scared. But I found a gift in this where I realized I didn't need her here to feed me, or to really take care of me- I could take care of me. And that's the truth for each of us- we always take care of ourselves.
I'm sorry your husband is abusive as you describe. Perhaps this is a vacation for you then? I am confident that this 9 days will allow you to deepen your self-understanding and will make you stronger. The opportunity in this is to see that you are your own safe person and that you have your own options to play with in life.
It did help me to have this website back then. Maybe you could keep a forum going each day to discuss your days while he is gone and your impressions of things. You could set goals for you to reach each day and share them with people. Do you have family/friends nearby you could see or call? That helped me quite a lot. You'll do great- I just know it!
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Guest
I agree with Sparkus totally. Treat this as a vacation and work on your self esteem. Why don't you invite some girlfriends over and rent some feel good chick flicks? I just really enjoyed the Jane Austen Book Club personally. Even watch some old ones that you've previously liked. I'd say make chocolate martinis but probably not the best idea depending on your anxiety. 
But do each other nails, buy some mud masks, etc. Maybe use your new free time to read a self empowerment book but definetly spend lots of time on yourself, you deserve it!
But do each other nails, buy some mud masks, etc. Maybe use your new free time to read a self empowerment book but definetly spend lots of time on yourself, you deserve it!