I have a lot of anxiety surrounding dental visits. Years ago when I had my first fillings, the dentist insisted on doing it without any novacaine. You can imagine how good that felt!

I avoided the dentist for a few years and finally went back last year, thinking I had finally found a good, gentle dentist. At first it was OK. Then I had to have a filling and he let his assistant do it. It was really traumatizing - she used a "dental dam" without even explaining why she was using it or what she was doing. I really freaked out to say the least. Having something cover your mouth/nose, freaking out that you can't breathe or that your jaw will lock (I have TMJ), etc. The end result was even more pain in my teeth than before.
Well so six months later I KNOW I need to go and found a new dentist. I do like him/his staff so far, the cleaning went well and I had no anxiety. however today I go in to do a filling that I kept putting off and I am really scared and anxious. By the way, the last dentist (or assistant) that did my botched filling is now resulting in having to do that filling over again.
What can I tell myself to let go of some of this anxiety? I'm so scared I will be in pain or that it will be as traumatic as my last experience. Relaxation techniques? Ahh!