Well n e way i was just wondering if anyone can relate or just have a comment.
thanxs...
signing out: Shelly
tryen to get thru this
Hey everyone I just need to vent, I have been dealing with this since last June, I have no idea where it came from. Right now im just trying to accept it. Lately i have been having a little relationship problem and just trust issues but i know i can get thru that and i know it does take time. I dunno what to label my self with... I have had 2 panic attacks that i can recall, my first one was last year in July and i went to the ER cuz it was my very first time expereienceing it. My second was just recently in March. Eversince then I just felt homebounded... I can handle going outside and to my neighbors and to walmart which is only 3 minutes away but then i feel like im affraid of going further but then i dont know why. I do hate the anxious feelings but then i have delt with it so i know how it feels. I really want to get out there and just enjoy my life but then everytime i try i feel so bad and yucky... just feeling all the anxiety symtoms. Going to Walmart is usualy hard for me but then when im in the store for an hour then i get used to it. What really sucks is...i live in a small town, everything is 25 minutes and up away from me. The last time i was able to travel 25 minutes away was in February. Some people say im Agoraphobia but then im not sure... i researched on that and i dont feel that im afraid of embarassing myself or having a panic attack but then im so not sure... Between January and March i was seeing a therapist and we didnt get really far cuz i stoped after my panic attack in March. I tried going b 4 March ended but then i went only 13 minutes away from home and couldnt handle my body symtoms. i called my therapist and told her and she right away wanted to recomend me to a Psych and put me on meds.... I thought that was so messed up... I fear meds and the side effects... But honestly i dont think im that bad and need meds.... i know i can hardly leave my house right now but then im sure it is just has to do with my thinking... I dunno how to deal with it doe... i have 2 kids and i wish i can just take them to the park and just enjoy... I havent traveled out of my county for already a year... and i hate that... I been invited to birthday partys, and baby showers and weddings and so on but its just so far for me to go...It's so crazy.....i was just living a nice wonderful life before this all came to me last year... And i seriously seriously dont know how to take it... I got the program in the beginning of the month but then i just havent had the motivation in getting into it... I only worked on session 1. I have done the program online between January and the beginning of March but then i didnt really take it seriously just because i felt fine. So i really didnt learn much. I have been reading so much forum from so much different people and i dont understand how do u all deal with this anxiety adn depression... i mean i understand where my depression came but then my anxiety... i have no idea. I so wish i can have a therapist visit me at home and talk to me and just help me thru this but i dunno how or where to look.
Well n e way i was just wondering if anyone can relate or just have a comment.
thanxs...
signing out: Shelly
Well n e way i was just wondering if anyone can relate or just have a comment.
thanxs...
signing out: Shelly
-
Guest
I think just talking to a therapist was a big step for you. I went the medication approach, somewhat beacuse I feared that less than a therapist. I think medication is a good temporary measure for stability from my experience. I've been on sleep meds for almost 2 years, and antidepressants since Dec. I do have to take sleep meds every night cause I can't relax otherwise.
Hopefully you can expand your comfort zome more. Maybe thereapy sessions over the phone would help until you can work up to in-person ones.
Don't know if this helps, just my experience with meds
Hopefully you can expand your comfort zome more. Maybe thereapy sessions over the phone would help until you can work up to in-person ones.
Don't know if this helps, just my experience with meds
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Guest
I can really relate. I have a hard time getting more than about a mile and half from my house and I've been that way for about two years. I have anxiety, and I used to have a lot of panic attacks when I went out, but my circle did get smaller, I was only going to work and back for a few months and then I just got so anxious for a while that I couldn't get much past my drive way without haveing an attack. Now I am building back up my ability to go out again and I am making quite a bit of progress just by trying to face it without fear of the body symptoms and panic. If you stop fearing those feelings they go away, it's the fear of the symptoms that perpetuates the terrible body symptoms (viscious cycle). I can tell you that I just had a theraphy session for the first time on the phone today. It was only the first session and I have had therapy in the past, it takes some time like anything else. We'll see if it helps. Until then I will just keep making my circle bigger.
To be honest with you, if I could go back and get some help while I was still able to face public or get more than a few miles from my house, I would. I didn't really tell anyone because I was soo embarrassed and I didn;t really know that there was word for what I was going through or that anyone else had ever experienced it.
I would also make very sure not to be hard on yourself, but do acknoledge the issue becaseu it may go away but it may not.
I personally think that beating myself to a pulp about the issue was what put me in such a state that it snowballed.
I really do recommend the program, it has worked wonders for my generalized anxiety and my self esteem. Healthy self talk is a huge key to success and the end of anxiety and depression. You should work through the program if for nothing else than to learn how to get your thoughts going in the right direction. I didn't think I was negative, but it's like the program says, if you weren't negative or hard on yourself, you wouldn't feel bad in some way and you wouldn't have problems with anxiety or depression. Give it whirl, you won't be sorry. =)
Keep your head up, (it sounds like you are)!
If you ever want to talk at all about your feelings I am listening, I have had this problem for a while and I could also use a person who understands, although you're not as far in it at all as I am.
To be honest with you, if I could go back and get some help while I was still able to face public or get more than a few miles from my house, I would. I didn't really tell anyone because I was soo embarrassed and I didn;t really know that there was word for what I was going through or that anyone else had ever experienced it.
I would also make very sure not to be hard on yourself, but do acknoledge the issue becaseu it may go away but it may not.
I personally think that beating myself to a pulp about the issue was what put me in such a state that it snowballed.
I really do recommend the program, it has worked wonders for my generalized anxiety and my self esteem. Healthy self talk is a huge key to success and the end of anxiety and depression. You should work through the program if for nothing else than to learn how to get your thoughts going in the right direction. I didn't think I was negative, but it's like the program says, if you weren't negative or hard on yourself, you wouldn't feel bad in some way and you wouldn't have problems with anxiety or depression. Give it whirl, you won't be sorry. =)
Keep your head up, (it sounds like you are)!
If you ever want to talk at all about your feelings I am listening, I have had this problem for a while and I could also use a person who understands, although you're not as far in it at all as I am.
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Guest
Pls don't be so hard on yourself - you're going thru a lot right now. You are also much braver than you realize. You contacting a therapist is BIG - HUGGGGGGGGGGGGE. Be proud of that.
Initially, a lot of ALL THAT ANXIETY DISORDER "IS" & "MAKES YOU FEEL" is foreign - yes, kind of like "what is this? where is this coming fr". That just comes fr "lack of knowledge" & "no skillset" - all that can be remedied.
If I may give you advice, recoverer to sufferer - <span class="ev_code_RED">DON'T PUT OFF RECOVERY ANY LONGER!</span> You have the PROGRAM right? Work that program like no one's business. Follow that program STRICTLY, as INSTRUCTED: lesson c/d's + coaching video's + homework lessons in workbook. You mention you lacked motivation when it came to doing the program. I say, w/ the best of intentions,<span class="ev_code_RED">How bad do you want it? How bad do you want to feel better? How bad do you want to be recovered fr anxiety disorder? How bad do you want your personal freedom, to come & go AS YOU CHOOSE?</span>I'm asking you these questions, for which you'll probably say out loud "DUH", LOL - because your lacking all those things I just mentioned, in your life, COULD BE YOUR MOTIVATOR TO DO THE PROGRAM. Your lacking those things COULD be your motivator to STOP @ NOTHING, to go above & beyond to find out EVERYTHING ANXIETY DISORDER IS - take it to the NEXT LEVEL if you need to: get books/on line/research, etc You see, EMPOWERMENT is key w/ anxiety disorder. You become empowered when you educate yourself to all that anxiety disorder is. When you KNOW MORE/BETTER & apply the teachings that ARE out there, the FEAR of the FEAR & BODY SYMPTOMS lessen.
I simpy recommended these things, cause WHY PUT OFF FEELING BETTER & GREAT any longer? You have a PROGRAM - literally @ your fingertips that has helped HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS <span class="ev_code_RED">AROUND THE WORLD</span> - that statement is NOT just some SALES PLOY SHELLY. Rather, it is a proven fact - the PROGRAM works, when you WORK THE PROGRAM.
Listen, I like you, put those same questions out there, WHERE THE HECK IS THIS COMING FR? I didn't start @ the point I am now, w/ a WEALTH OF KNOWLEDGE & SKILLSETS. No, lord no, quite the opposite. Everyone's experiences/symptoms/journey to recovery fr anxiety disorder is different. I was never housebound(I think this was ignorance to what anxiety was - I simply didn't know) + I didn't suffer majority of the things most sufferers do. I still suffered HELL ON EARTH. I was diagnosed by my psychiatrist in MAY 2005 w/ anxiety disorder + panic attacks + PTSD(fr 3 different things) - I was informed by my REG DR + my PSYCHIATRIST(both of whom have never spoke to eachother about ME) that I was 1 of the worst cases I had ever seen. For the 1st time in my adult life(I was 37 @ the time), I COULDN'T WORK. This was foreign to me: I was on my own since my senior yr of HS & 10 yrs b/4 I got married in 1997 + graduated & worked FT + went to college @ nite & graduated. I was an independant & self sufficient woman. ANXIETY DISORDER turned my world upside dwn. I became <span class="ev_code_RED">inhibited + restricted + paralized </span>by mind numbing fear. I became totally dependant on my husband. I wasn't living, I was existing - my quality of life was BEYOND POOR - so much so, MY HEART HURT & I was so terribly unhappy - confused - bewildered - & desperate.
Majority of my "issues" behind my anxiety stemmed fr childhood experiences, unbeknownst to me. I had surpressed so many YR'SSSSSSSSSSSSSS of anger/pain/fear/resentment to a BOATLOAD of things, that they parlayed over into modern day/today's times. In other words, I was not the woman LENORE - an individual in & of herself. Rather, I was the SUM TOTAL of all the emotions I couldn't & didn't feel + all the experiences I had gone thru. Because I had all the PENT UP FEELINGS, I obviously wasn't always in the greatest mood. In addition, because I hadn't addressed them/ didn't understand them/didn't know how - whenever I encountered anything similiar in the NOW - I was ON - defending myself = kind of like, emotionally DOING WHAT I THOUGHT WAS RIGHT BY ME - undoing THEN in the now, if that makes sense. How could I live in the NOW & feel GOOD, if I didn't let go of then? I couldn't. <span class="ev_code_RED">Again, I wasn't doing these things deliberately - I didn't even know. ANXIETY FORCING MY HAND - simply showed me what I was doing. </span> While simultaneously surpressing all these deep/painful emotions, I also created some pretty negative LEARNED BEHAVIORS. These behaviors I am referencing were yrsss in the making, probably since I was 5 yrs old. Shelly, I used to joke: w/ all the things I've gone thru, I AM LIKE A WALKING 2 WK'S OF OPRAH! That's the thing: Yes, I was a victim to things no child should go thru -FINE, that is fact. However, I WAS LIVING AS A VICTIM - & as long as I was, I would never ever have inner peace. How long could I go on like that? Doing all that is what got me here. Now, I am not blaming myself or them - BLAME BELONGS TO NO ONE. What I am saying is this: <span class="ev_code_RED">I am responsible for me + I am responsible for "undoing" the negative learned behaviors I created(irrevalent to why or their source) + if I wanted to feel better, then it was I who needed to do something about it.</span>
It was all that anxiety disorder made me feel & the quality of life it gave me, when I was at my worst - that was my personal motivator. I WANTED TO FEEL BETTER. I initiated therapy - he was going to help me help myself: I needed help & if I was being given the means - an ans to a prayer - then nothing on God's green earth was gonna stop me. Then, I gave it all to God - I asked him to guide me & told him I was WILLING to do what HE KNEW WAS BEST for me. Then, I initiated journaling: simply to get myself to a place where I was comfortable admitting what I was thinking & feeling & TO FEEL THEM - get them out there & resolve them - so I am not in an infinate state of fear of them. Then, I researched like a nut, lol: I read 16 + books on anxiety disorder - so I could become informed about what it is = empowerment. Now, I was home for 3 1/2 yrs - recovering. No, I wasn't agoraphobic - my state was such, I didn't have the emotional or physical capacity to work.
Was I miserable - like HELL YEAH. But, again, that was my motivator. After going thru 20 mths of intensive therapy, I was ready to take responsibility for myself. I bought Lucinda's program & started it the 1st time in Nov 2006. <span class="ev_code_RED">EVERY SINGLE ASPECT OF WHAT ANXIETY DISORDER MAKES YOU FEEL - will make it feel almost impossible to do all the things necessary to recover - including her PROGRAM. </span> I, amongst many many people, DID IT ANYWAY - pushed ahead, 1 day @ a time. Is it hard? Yes, the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life. HARD & CONSISTANT WORK, THOUGH - got me recovered. There was absolutely nothing more important to me than FEELING BETTER - RECOVERED, NOTHING.
I'll tell ya another thing, I never took a med in my entire life - maybe an antibiotic when I had the flu or something. So, when this went dwn, the need for anxiety meds & sleep aids became very apparent. I consulted my reg dr + psychiatrist + pharmacist. I made the decision to go on these meds - w/ 2 stipulations:
<span class="ev_code_RED">1) I wouldn't be so numbed that I couldn't feel anything. I wanted to feel what was inside of me. 2) If I was gonna take a med, we would address ANYTHING & EVERYTHING IN THERAPY - we were gonna TAKE IT THERE. I didn't like knowing I had to - but I knew me & ME STAYING ON ANXIETY MEDS & SLEEPS AIDS INDEFINITELY was not an option for me.</span>I was afraid - afraid to get addicted. Heck, where I grew up, there was rampant drug abuse of illegal & prescription drugs - so much so, as a little girl I swore THAT WILL NEVER BE ME. So, I needed the meds - big deal. Then, I just had to do the work required, so that maybe I didn't would not need them forever. Guess what Shelly? I HAVEN'T TAKEN A SLEEP AID IN ALMOST 2 YRS - now remember, I needed 2 sleep aids, that is how bad I was. In addition, I haven't taken an anxiety med in 1 1/2 yrs +.Medication simply helped me calm the symptoms, so I could FOCUS enough to do the work I needed to - TO RECOVER.
I don't mean to sound contrite or disrespectful @ all - sincerely. But, HOW BAD DO YOU WANT IT - recovery is hard work - consistant & daily, every day = results. Don't believe the LIES & NONSENSE anxiety disorder tells you - THEY ARE B.S.
LENORE
Initially, a lot of ALL THAT ANXIETY DISORDER "IS" & "MAKES YOU FEEL" is foreign - yes, kind of like "what is this? where is this coming fr". That just comes fr "lack of knowledge" & "no skillset" - all that can be remedied.
If I may give you advice, recoverer to sufferer - <span class="ev_code_RED">DON'T PUT OFF RECOVERY ANY LONGER!</span> You have the PROGRAM right? Work that program like no one's business. Follow that program STRICTLY, as INSTRUCTED: lesson c/d's + coaching video's + homework lessons in workbook. You mention you lacked motivation when it came to doing the program. I say, w/ the best of intentions,<span class="ev_code_RED">How bad do you want it? How bad do you want to feel better? How bad do you want to be recovered fr anxiety disorder? How bad do you want your personal freedom, to come & go AS YOU CHOOSE?</span>I'm asking you these questions, for which you'll probably say out loud "DUH", LOL - because your lacking all those things I just mentioned, in your life, COULD BE YOUR MOTIVATOR TO DO THE PROGRAM. Your lacking those things COULD be your motivator to STOP @ NOTHING, to go above & beyond to find out EVERYTHING ANXIETY DISORDER IS - take it to the NEXT LEVEL if you need to: get books/on line/research, etc You see, EMPOWERMENT is key w/ anxiety disorder. You become empowered when you educate yourself to all that anxiety disorder is. When you KNOW MORE/BETTER & apply the teachings that ARE out there, the FEAR of the FEAR & BODY SYMPTOMS lessen.
I simpy recommended these things, cause WHY PUT OFF FEELING BETTER & GREAT any longer? You have a PROGRAM - literally @ your fingertips that has helped HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS <span class="ev_code_RED">AROUND THE WORLD</span> - that statement is NOT just some SALES PLOY SHELLY. Rather, it is a proven fact - the PROGRAM works, when you WORK THE PROGRAM.
Listen, I like you, put those same questions out there, WHERE THE HECK IS THIS COMING FR? I didn't start @ the point I am now, w/ a WEALTH OF KNOWLEDGE & SKILLSETS. No, lord no, quite the opposite. Everyone's experiences/symptoms/journey to recovery fr anxiety disorder is different. I was never housebound(I think this was ignorance to what anxiety was - I simply didn't know) + I didn't suffer majority of the things most sufferers do. I still suffered HELL ON EARTH. I was diagnosed by my psychiatrist in MAY 2005 w/ anxiety disorder + panic attacks + PTSD(fr 3 different things) - I was informed by my REG DR + my PSYCHIATRIST(both of whom have never spoke to eachother about ME) that I was 1 of the worst cases I had ever seen. For the 1st time in my adult life(I was 37 @ the time), I COULDN'T WORK. This was foreign to me: I was on my own since my senior yr of HS & 10 yrs b/4 I got married in 1997 + graduated & worked FT + went to college @ nite & graduated. I was an independant & self sufficient woman. ANXIETY DISORDER turned my world upside dwn. I became <span class="ev_code_RED">inhibited + restricted + paralized </span>by mind numbing fear. I became totally dependant on my husband. I wasn't living, I was existing - my quality of life was BEYOND POOR - so much so, MY HEART HURT & I was so terribly unhappy - confused - bewildered - & desperate.
Majority of my "issues" behind my anxiety stemmed fr childhood experiences, unbeknownst to me. I had surpressed so many YR'SSSSSSSSSSSSSS of anger/pain/fear/resentment to a BOATLOAD of things, that they parlayed over into modern day/today's times. In other words, I was not the woman LENORE - an individual in & of herself. Rather, I was the SUM TOTAL of all the emotions I couldn't & didn't feel + all the experiences I had gone thru. Because I had all the PENT UP FEELINGS, I obviously wasn't always in the greatest mood. In addition, because I hadn't addressed them/ didn't understand them/didn't know how - whenever I encountered anything similiar in the NOW - I was ON - defending myself = kind of like, emotionally DOING WHAT I THOUGHT WAS RIGHT BY ME - undoing THEN in the now, if that makes sense. How could I live in the NOW & feel GOOD, if I didn't let go of then? I couldn't. <span class="ev_code_RED">Again, I wasn't doing these things deliberately - I didn't even know. ANXIETY FORCING MY HAND - simply showed me what I was doing. </span> While simultaneously surpressing all these deep/painful emotions, I also created some pretty negative LEARNED BEHAVIORS. These behaviors I am referencing were yrsss in the making, probably since I was 5 yrs old. Shelly, I used to joke: w/ all the things I've gone thru, I AM LIKE A WALKING 2 WK'S OF OPRAH! That's the thing: Yes, I was a victim to things no child should go thru -FINE, that is fact. However, I WAS LIVING AS A VICTIM - & as long as I was, I would never ever have inner peace. How long could I go on like that? Doing all that is what got me here. Now, I am not blaming myself or them - BLAME BELONGS TO NO ONE. What I am saying is this: <span class="ev_code_RED">I am responsible for me + I am responsible for "undoing" the negative learned behaviors I created(irrevalent to why or their source) + if I wanted to feel better, then it was I who needed to do something about it.</span>
It was all that anxiety disorder made me feel & the quality of life it gave me, when I was at my worst - that was my personal motivator. I WANTED TO FEEL BETTER. I initiated therapy - he was going to help me help myself: I needed help & if I was being given the means - an ans to a prayer - then nothing on God's green earth was gonna stop me. Then, I gave it all to God - I asked him to guide me & told him I was WILLING to do what HE KNEW WAS BEST for me. Then, I initiated journaling: simply to get myself to a place where I was comfortable admitting what I was thinking & feeling & TO FEEL THEM - get them out there & resolve them - so I am not in an infinate state of fear of them. Then, I researched like a nut, lol: I read 16 + books on anxiety disorder - so I could become informed about what it is = empowerment. Now, I was home for 3 1/2 yrs - recovering. No, I wasn't agoraphobic - my state was such, I didn't have the emotional or physical capacity to work.
Was I miserable - like HELL YEAH. But, again, that was my motivator. After going thru 20 mths of intensive therapy, I was ready to take responsibility for myself. I bought Lucinda's program & started it the 1st time in Nov 2006. <span class="ev_code_RED">EVERY SINGLE ASPECT OF WHAT ANXIETY DISORDER MAKES YOU FEEL - will make it feel almost impossible to do all the things necessary to recover - including her PROGRAM. </span> I, amongst many many people, DID IT ANYWAY - pushed ahead, 1 day @ a time. Is it hard? Yes, the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life. HARD & CONSISTANT WORK, THOUGH - got me recovered. There was absolutely nothing more important to me than FEELING BETTER - RECOVERED, NOTHING.
I'll tell ya another thing, I never took a med in my entire life - maybe an antibiotic when I had the flu or something. So, when this went dwn, the need for anxiety meds & sleep aids became very apparent. I consulted my reg dr + psychiatrist + pharmacist. I made the decision to go on these meds - w/ 2 stipulations:
<span class="ev_code_RED">1) I wouldn't be so numbed that I couldn't feel anything. I wanted to feel what was inside of me. 2) If I was gonna take a med, we would address ANYTHING & EVERYTHING IN THERAPY - we were gonna TAKE IT THERE. I didn't like knowing I had to - but I knew me & ME STAYING ON ANXIETY MEDS & SLEEPS AIDS INDEFINITELY was not an option for me.</span>I was afraid - afraid to get addicted. Heck, where I grew up, there was rampant drug abuse of illegal & prescription drugs - so much so, as a little girl I swore THAT WILL NEVER BE ME. So, I needed the meds - big deal. Then, I just had to do the work required, so that maybe I didn't would not need them forever. Guess what Shelly? I HAVEN'T TAKEN A SLEEP AID IN ALMOST 2 YRS - now remember, I needed 2 sleep aids, that is how bad I was. In addition, I haven't taken an anxiety med in 1 1/2 yrs +.Medication simply helped me calm the symptoms, so I could FOCUS enough to do the work I needed to - TO RECOVER.
I don't mean to sound contrite or disrespectful @ all - sincerely. But, HOW BAD DO YOU WANT IT - recovery is hard work - consistant & daily, every day = results. Don't believe the LIES & NONSENSE anxiety disorder tells you - THEY ARE B.S.
LENORE
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Guest
Shelly, DEFINITELY work the program EVERY day especially the relaxation tape. You are worth it! It will help you go to the park and really enjoy your kids. You need to nurture the little girl inside of you.
I too live in a small town. This program and people on the forums have helped me so much. It will do the same for you. We're all here to help each other. Now go listen to your CDs and get out that workbook! Keep us posted how it's going. Possibly you could get on meds but if you feel strongly against it keep working the program and coming here. Getting control of those negative thoughts is usually the biggest issue.
Oh, being in a small town I still don't drive real far but I got the driving CD and drove by a friend 4 hrs. away. There I met a friend of hers who I got in business with. I'm excited about it and today I'm driving with my husband near Chicago for school to learn more. I'm doing it (tho still scared at times) and know you can do it too. We need to RUN TO THE ROAR... that's our fear. Face the fear head on and stop letting it have power over us. We have the power over our fears.
I too live in a small town. This program and people on the forums have helped me so much. It will do the same for you. We're all here to help each other. Now go listen to your CDs and get out that workbook!
Keep us posted how it's going. Possibly you could get on meds but if you feel strongly against it keep working the program and coming here. Getting control of those negative thoughts is usually the biggest issue. Oh, being in a small town I still don't drive real far but I got the driving CD and drove by a friend 4 hrs. away. There I met a friend of hers who I got in business with. I'm excited about it and today I'm driving with my husband near Chicago for school to learn more. I'm doing it (tho still scared at times) and know you can do it too. We need to RUN TO THE ROAR... that's our fear. Face the fear head on and stop letting it have power over us. We have the power over our fears.
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Guest
Hey Everyone, thank you for your response, All of you are so wonderful.It's great knowing you all,care and understand what im going thru, even though we dont know each other. I appreciate every advice you all have given me. I know this program will help and i will try my hardest to take it all in. My hubby agreed to help me thru it so thats great, just need to start makeing a schedule. I have been so lazy the past year, just been on the computer almost all day and watching tv... i know i need to stop and change my lifestyle. So from here till so on it's gonna be all different... I want to overcome this and just live the normal life i once lived. Thank you all and we will get thru this.
<span class="ev_code_RED">"Be strong, be couragous, don't be afraid, and don't be discouraged. For the lord your god is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9</span>
<span class="ev_code_RED">"Be strong, be couragous, don't be afraid, and don't be discouraged. For the lord your god is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9</span>