Letter 2 my father

cap77 · Post by **cap77** » Fri Jun 27, 2008 7:28 pm

There's alot of people in my family who've been struggling with anxiety for a long time. Most of them self medicate with anti-anxiety meds. They're in coma as far as I'm concerned!!! If you have a problem with my opinion then stop reading this!!!! This is coming from a guy who's been so addicted to xanax, klonopin, and valium, that he'd steel from his own mother to get these drugs. This right here is a letter to my pops who owns a construction company that I used to work for.

Dad,
I told you about my anxiety program a couple of months ago. This thing is literally life changing, I'm not bs'n ya.. You've seen what I used to be(aghoraphobic), which to you and everyone else means lazy. HA HA far from it! I can't believe what this program has done for me. Today I feel inspired, motivated, and successful. Keep in mind I'm 31 and live with mom and still feel successful, "The world is mine, all mine". I no longer need the approval of others. If you have a problem with me or don't like that, that's your problem, not mine. Does that sound selfish to you? I could care less!!! Everybody has anxiety, but it's all about how you deal with it. LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL, so why be p'd off and worry about things all the time? There's tons of negativity in your life that can't change. Don't even think about it, don't let it get to you. For several years I lost track of the man I can be. Do I regret it? No, the everyday ordinary person will never respect life the way I do. They'll never be as low as I was, and it'll be hard to be as high as I am. I'm the defination of a Japanese Pheonix. I come from the bottom and I'm gonna rise to the top. "Rising up from the ashes". I guess I'm writing this because I'm excited about my life and want you to know that you can feel the same. Watch me, follow me, listen to me, because I'm very passionatte about everyday that I have left!!! I'm not here to change the world by no means, just myself...And if I can lead by example then great.. I've been following you for years, and I'm now asking you to come with me. I'm ready to get it done. I love you, dad!!!

hopehound · Post by **hopehound** » Fri Jun 27, 2008 11:42 pm

Cap,
What can I say brother? Very inspirational. It sounds like you have made incredible progress. It lets me know I am on the right track. On week 3 right now. Definitely noticing a shift, but still a long way to go. One sentence in your letter hit me like a ton of bricks...

"For several years I lost track of the man I can be. Do I regret it? No, the everyday ordinary person will never respect life the way I do. They'll never be as low as I was, and it'll be hard to be as high as I am."

Wow. The funny thing is as I am going through this program, I almost have a sense of loss. Loss of life that should have been enjoyed, experienced and shared. I had grief at what I think I could have been. What a new perspective! I am realizing now, that when I come out on the other side of this, I too will have a respect for the everyday and the ordinary. And this is because I know I missed it for so long.

Thanks for sharing. Very powerful to me.

Eric

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Jun 28, 2008 1:10 am

I'd love to say some of this to my Dad!! Beautifully written and an inspiration to me!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Jun 28, 2008 1:05 pm

Cap77

Good for you, it sounds like you have come a very long way. Great letter o your Dad.

I always like to ask others who are where you are now what do you think contibuted most to your recovery-in regards to the program? for me it was the way I entertained the negative thoughts. Once I changed that I was on my way.

Very happy for you,
Penu

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Jun 28, 2008 3:30 pm

I always like to ask others who are where you are now what do you think contibuted most to your recovery-in regards to the program? for me it was the way I entertained the negative thoughts. Once I changed that I was on my way.

Hi Penu, I think it was definately the positive self talk and writing down negative thoughts then changing them to positive ones.. That's when things started to click for me. I've finished the program and I'm now running back through lessons 2-8 just to soak up every little bit of this that I can. I might even go through the program a few times. It's literally life saving!!!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Jun 28, 2008 3:40 pm

The funny thing is as I am going through this program, I almost have a sense of loss. Loss of life that should have been enjoyed, experienced and shared. I had grief at what I think I could have been. What a new perspective! I am realizing now, that when I come out on the other side of this, I too will have a respect for the everyday and the ordinary. And this is because I know I missed it for so long.

Hey Eric, you're exactly right bro. I had felt like I'd lost so much before I got this program...But it's not a loss at all. I think we should caterogize all of this time to self improvement. Now that I'm where I'm at, I wouldn't change anything!!! I'll sometimes catch myself saying that I wish'd he/she(friends) felt as good as I do. LOL, This is a great way to live. Just be good to yourself and work this program, your life is about to change.

And thanx to everyone else for the posts!!!