betrayal by friend

jdhilty · Post by **jdhilty** » Thu Jan 29, 2009 2:36 pm

Im having a really hard time right now. one of my best friends was suffering from anxiety and panic attacks about 3 months ago. that was before i had my relapse . I would go over his house every day and try to get him out give him nothing but positive talk help him with money and so on. Well he finally started to come around . well about a mouth ago i was under a lot of stress and my attacks and worry came back in full force .I started to call him to talk he was like a new person he change his meds and they where really helping him it made me feel like there was hope i stared on my meds because i was so bad i didnt sleep for 5 days anyways i leaned on him alot was always calling him he made me feel good .Heres what happened my wife came home and ask me not to call john any more or go with him i ask why and she would not tell my so after i told her he was helping me she broke down and said that he was calling her and propositioned her he know i have been down for awhile now . she told me that and it seems like i took 10 steps back ward im in no shape to confront about if but i lost my support i leaned on him and trusted him now what really scared now please help dan

Inspiration is All Around · Post by **Inspiration is All Around** » Thu Jan 29, 2009 3:00 pm

Hello JD:
To be betrayed by anyone causes horrible anxiety.
Do you have the program?
I hope so. And I hope you are working on it.
Not too far into it you will find that it suggests we are our own best friend. And that is so.
I know how hard this is for you. Recently I was terribly disappointed by a brother. If you can't trust your own brother, then who??
But I have to get over it - and I will.
And you must get over your disappointment.
You can get well without this 'friend'.

The first step is to start working the program.
Start journaling. Do everything that the sessions suggest.
You will do much better than leaning on someone else.
You will gain confidence in yourself.
And that is what you need.
I wish you well.
MJ

DisneyGirl · Post by **DisneyGirl** » Thu Jan 29, 2009 4:08 pm

I am very sorry to hear that JD. It is horrible when someone we value and trust betrays us. I was betrayed earlier this year/late last year by someone I thought I could trust my life with. It hurts very badly. Focus on yourself right now. If you don't help yourself first you can't deal with any of the other problems. Good luck to you and come back if you need to talk.

hunnie33 · Post by **hunnie33** » Thu Jan 29, 2009 4:42 pm

This program has really taught me that I am my support system and so YOU are your support system. I have learned to stop relying on my friend as my SAFE person. I am not sure how far you are but I would recommend doing session two and journaling a lot. I journal so much and it really, really helps. Sometimes I journal until the pen falls out of my hand from exhaustion.

energy · Post by **energy** » Thu Jan 29, 2009 4:59 pm

i'm also very sorry to hear about your betrayal from your "friend"....it really sucks so bad when someone we love and care about betrays us...

i agree with what the others said, concentrate and work on yourself first and forget about this other person...you definitely do not need that kind of person in your life...i'm sure there are other people who you'll be able to rely on when you need to vent including yourself...

also, your wife sounds like such "good people" to me because she was very upfront and honest with you about your "friend" and she was watching out for you when she said not to call the other person no more - now theres another person you can count on and whos true to you...

you will get over this and you will move forward and you'll be much stronger by the experience...take care and best wishes to you...