does anxiety and selfishness go hand in hand?

catdr71 · Post by **catdr71** » Fri Dec 28, 2007 6:07 pm

hello there, my husband keeps telling me that i am selfish and that i only think of myself because i am so caught up in all this anxiety and panic and im starting to wonder if hes right. all i can think about is me and my problems. does anyone else feel like this and if so how can i change my focus? thanx ahead of time for the time to reply.

JodyLynn · Post by **JodyLynn** » Fri Dec 28, 2007 7:56 pm

Hi I just wanted to say that Lucinda says in session 2 that it is a little bit that we are selfish, BUT that we can't help it. How can we not be when all our thoughts are so strong. We can't run away from ourselves. We have to live with it, so of course we're consumed with what we're feeling and thinking. That's why we're here so don't feel bad. We're all in the same boat!! Hugs, Jody

catdr71 · Post by **catdr71** » Sun Dec 30, 2007 6:03 pm

jodylynn, thanx for taking the time to reply. yeah i guess your right, it really isnt possible to put other things in front of such strong feelings and symptoms. i will continue to work on it and wish you a safe and happy new year!!!!! cathy

Suzanne Nader · Post by **Suzanne Nader** » Sun Dec 30, 2007 9:45 pm

I think when we are overcome with anxiety it takes over our mindset. I find that changing my focus, perhaps working on a hobby or a project I enjoy, helps me to process my anxiety and still be productive. Of course talking about it helps a great deal. I also journal my feelings as a way to vent and understand myself.

Dalman · Post by **Dalman** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 12:11 am

Catdr71

Your not selfish, You have an illness, same as if you had polio or a cold. your body is not working correctly, in this case its your thinking. But the fact that your here working on getting better, tells me your not selfish, He is selfish for not supporting you in your time of need. Good luck and God Bless you.

faithandhope · Post by **faithandhope** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 3:48 am

Hi Cathy,
I tried to reply to you a couple of days ago but had trouble. I think you need to be careful about calling yourself selfish. Unfortunately, anxiety and depression can cause you to act selfish but we probably wouldn't have these issues if we were truly selfish. Plus we have to be careful about labeling ourselves. If we label them we may think that it is true or that is the way we are. Instead we can label the behavior and know that anxiety and depression is the cause. It is not who we are truly are or want to be. That is why we are all here!
It sounds like your husband may be having some difficulties supporting you through this. It is tough on everyone but maybe you can tell him in terms of this isn't you but the anxiety and depression.
All the Best!!
Faith

catdr71 · Post by **catdr71** » Tue Jan 08, 2008 3:08 am

hi everyone, i just wanted to thank you all for your replies. sometimes i do feel like the most selfish person on earth because of the anxiety and only being able to focus on getting better. i do know that when i didnt have these anxiety issues i always thought of everyone else before myself so i know it truely is from the anxiety. i am feeling stronger and working hard to overcome all my insecurities and fears and i thank you all again and wish everyone happiness and peace of mind........cathy

diva · Post by **diva** » Tue Jan 08, 2008 8:42 am

I would have to agree that maybe hubby is lacking a little in support at this time. Maybe he is so used to you doing everything for people like you said that maybe now he views you as selfish?? Only you know for sure. I don't like labeling either like the other post.