Growing up !

[forever young 06]

THH, manomusic, good seeing you guys on here I love reading your post. I just grew up today too manomusic. mom passed away this morning. she has been real bad for the past month. we knew but it is sad. I have always clung to here years past when I was at my worst with agrophobia. I am feeling a little anxious but need to watch my thinking that is the key.

[manofmusic]

Forever Young !

I'm sorry to hear about your mom ! It's been a rough year for so many people I know. You are right about watching your thinking. It's going to be rough for the next while. Just know this and know that we are all beside you all the way. With my dad passing away earlier this year, I know how tough it can be. How old was your mom ?

My mom is really liking the seniors home. The physio guy had her lifting weights again today. My mom has congesive heart failure and lymphoma. I treat every day as a gift. She could kick around another 10 years or next year. One day at a time.

THH - I was born when they lived in that house. They bought the house in 1963 and I came along 2 years later. With all of the stuff that went on this year, it seems that selling the house is just another blip on the radar. I went there after work to pack some things for the second hand store (I hate to take it to the dump - it's still good stuff). Mom is feeling really good now. I see her 3 to 4 times a week after work and the other days I call her. I only stay for an hour or less. Mom has really fit in good there. This place is decorated to the hilt for Christmas. I noticed that there were a ton of red stockings hanging around the perimiter of the main court yard. As I'm looking around, I see mom's name on one ! How cool ! I want one too LOL They are treating her like the queen she is ! She's eating really good and has snacks in between. She's 82 and she feels like she's 50 ! She's really come a long way physically in the past few months. Now that we're at the tail end of selling the house, etc etc, we are all starting to calm down. My main concern has always been mom. I told her that she can call me anytime at home or at work (there's a phone on my desk) and she can leave me her "to-do" list LOL I think that this crazy year may end off on a good note. Mom said to me "I'll bet your sleeping really good now that I'm being taken care of". I said "You better believe it" LOL She really does like it there and they are all treating her like she's the only one there. When I get old, I want to go there.........WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY down the road ! LOL

Tunes to come......

[forever young 06]

manomusic mom was 87 she had a mass in her colon which we didn't take out because she was too weak. she went down hill from there. I know how it is a relief when they go in the home. I kn ow it was good with mom for a while. then she didn't like and she didn't like taking medicine so we had a time. I have been down all day i dread the funeral I keep thing i need to call her and then I keep seeing her laying there dead and it seemed like she should have still been breathing. I knew you had lost your dad this year.

[THH]

Forever Young,
So sorry to hear about the death of your mother. This has been a year of loss for many of us. I still have both my mother and father, but have lost several friends, cousins and a uncle. Its hard, hard hard. We do have each other on here to help us. We do support each other and I hope you come here when you need some reasurance. I have found this great place I will post the web site. Click on the topics that interest you. I found many things at this site that helped me. I hope you can too.
http://connect.legacy.com/inspire/page/ ... age%3A3305
We are learning to be grown ups, wise older elders! Maybe one day we will be able to help others who have these life experances. It forces us to be connected with our faith, and if you believe in God ask for his help. He will provide you with what you need each day of your life. I will keep you in my prayers~

Manofmusic,
Ahhhh, sorry to hear that was your home for a long time! I'm sure you have very fond memories of living there. They are yours forever!

Oh man that is so very cool about your mom! I love the fact she is fitting in so well and it really does sound like a great place! Maybe you should take your stocking over there and pin it up! LOL.... My husbands uncle (he was a batchlor his whole life) lived in a place such as this, and it was very cool. Funny story, about 2 weeks before his uncle passed, he was visiting one of the elder ladies down the hall. He took his bottle of vodka down there and mixed drinks for the both of them. They were laughing and having a good time. The nurse came down and said Mr. X you can't be doing this????? And Uncle said look, were 95 years old - why not?! She turned around and closed the door. What the heck, right!!!!
You are such a good son!!!!! I can't believe how good you are to you mom. Thats awasome! She is very lucky to have you!!!

Oh I know, I think of that too. We will be wayyyyyyyyy lucky to have such fine care when we are old. And that is ffffffffffffffaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrr off! LOL.... P.S. Maybe we will end up at the same place and can control the tunes in the old folks home! LOL...

[manofmusic]

Forever Young,

How are things going for you now ? Remember to take it one day at a time. I know it's tough now to not let a bunch of negative thoughts go thru your head. Just picture us standing beside you helping you thru this.

THH - LOL !!!!!!! I love it ! LOL I have no doubt that the vodka bottle's been open a few times in the building mom's in. I think it's great that your uncle had a good sense of humour right up until the end ! That's awesome !

When you walk into the senior's home that mom's in, there's an old console stereo playing tunes. I walked in after work and they were playing Rod Stewert - Tonight's the Night, and there was an older lady sleeping in the chair next to the stereo. It was way too funny for me. I laughed to myself all the way to mom's apartment ! LOL

I really should get a stocking and hang it up. Actually maybe a pair of panty hose.....two stockings that can be overly streched to fit more loot ! LOL

Tonight, mom was looking at old anniversary and birthday cards that dad sent to her over the years. She's really reminiscing now. I think it's good for her. It helps her deal with all of the crap she's gone thru this year.

I deal with things like that by making sure I get plenty of sleep. I'm eating good 80% of the time and with all of the moving of mom's stuff, exercise is happening.

I hope you all had a good day today !!!!!

[forever young 06]

thanks mano for your kind words. I have had the negative and guilt thoughts why did I say this why didn't I go see her more she was lonley well we all are. I did the best I could at the time yes I could have done more but hey I can't change that. THH thanks for the grief link it is helpful. mom was very sick and she is better off she is out of her suffering. I need to focus on getting myself well with my phobias.

[THH]

Manofmusic,

Life is good! I pull myself up & I had a good doctor visit, I am healthy! Now for my teeth cleaning on Thursday and getting my holiday stuff and then settle in for my long winters nap! LOL...NAP who gets naps???? That should be a requirement. Lunch hour, and 1/2 hour nap. LOL... Right!

Oh he did. He was the most delightful man I ever met. And he really lived right up to his end. Maybe you can have some holiday cheers with them. Better get you stocking up!!! LOL...

I bet it was funny too with hearing Rod Stewart playing. I'm sure you could pick some toe tappers for them. Keep it in mind....

I'm glad your mom has some treasures to remind her of your dad and the early years, How nice.

Putting up the tree tonight, now the big question is clear lights or colored? Something about lights is soothing to me. I like to turn them on, climb on the couch, Maybe an old movie, thats a nice night for me! Nice and relaxing. Do you have a tree?

Forever young,
I'm glad I could help!
For me seeing people in pain makes me so uncomfortable, I start thinking I have all kinds of stuff. I know now its a distraction from feeling helpless. I agree with you as much as I don't want to loose them, the suffering is worse.
Take care of yourself....

[manofmusic]

THH,

Well, mom and dad had this really tall ceramic Christmas tree. Dad really liked it. I inherited it. So, in honour of dad, I have that sitting on a table instead of my regular Christmas tree. I have a wreath on the door. I'm keeping it simple this Christmas. I mentioned before that mom wanted to stay at the senior's home with her new friends for Christmas. This year, I'm going out to the county and spending it with my aunt and cousin (she's the same age as me) and her husband and their kids. I'll go visit friends throughout the week too. I'm just keeping it simple. I'll go see mom Christmas day. I get her a few things to open up. She likes the Thomas Kinkade calender. It goes in a wooden frame. I get her that every year. I'll get her gift certificates to different places.

The new people take over mom's house on Friday. Her car is in my driveway now and will stay here until she needs to be picked up in it for her appointments. Her next appointment isn't until March. I'll take it on the road once a week just to keep the juices flowing good in it. We are all finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel !

Did you go clear lights or coloured ??????????

[SoWhatif]

Manifmusic, congrats on the challange and mastering the change.
With that outlook you will Have a great manys days to come.

[THH]

Manofmusic,
I love those trees! My mom has one that she did in ceramics like 30 years ago, its really pretty though. Good for you putting it out. I would be happy with that too!

I put up our small fake tree, clear lights! Tuff decision. I think the clear look best in my house. Maybe next year I will do the colored. I like it simple as well. Compared to some it is. My parents come over with my sister on Christmas. I make dinner and we watch a movie or play a game. My shopping is quite easy as well. My parent need cash ola and I buy a gift for my sister. My husband and I exchange a gift too. So it really has gotten much easier as time has gone on.

I agree with sowhatif, that out look will bring you many great days ahead!

I had a good visit at the dentist too!

We have company from out of town. My husbands friend. He is such a easy guest I can't believe it. So I am going to watch the new pirates movie! LOL....Caption Jack Sparrow here I come!!!
Have a great night!