Hi everyone. It's been a long time since I posted, but I guess that's a good thing. I got the program a year ago, went through it and really improved my day to day quality of life. I went back to the unanxious me....that is until my world got rocked last week.
Last week my father-in-law was diagnosed with several inoperable brain tumors. Since we learned the diagnosis, my anxiety has reared its angry head. I hate the feelings I'm having and I don't know if this is what "normal" people would be experiencing or just my anxiety starting to arise again. I think it all boils down to feel so sad for my husband not feeling like there is anything I can do to comfort him, as he is way to young to be dealing losing his dad potentially. You know that feeling of control most of us need, I don't have any control over the situation.
Any one have any suggestions on how to cope? Books to read?? Any advice is appreciated.
Need support...Major Medical Issues with my fam
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Guest
vahorsegirl,
first of all, let me say that I am truly sorry.
i lost my mother to breast cancer back in '99 when i was 25, and my father has been recovering/ dealing with a blood cancer for the past 3 years. i'm now 34, just got married, and we have a baby on the way in May.
i don't know if this one would be right for you, but i'm reading a book right now called "Forgive for Good", and its idea is to be forgiving and not to hold grudges.
to explain what i mean: i think that i still hold a grudge against God for taking my Mom from me, my sister, and most of all my father when we were just getting started with our lives.
i think i hold a grudge against God for now having my father have to deal with cancer.
Reading this book now, I understand that although understandably a wrong, me holding a grudge does nothing to cure the situation; it does not bring my mother back or heal my father. what it does do is weigh me down with burdens that are beyond my understanding.
there are so many different ways to go with this and i certainly do not want to come across as the expert here.
i really want to offer you some small comfort in knowing that you, and your husband are not alone.
losing my mother left a huge, dark, empty hole in my heart for many years. it was not until i met my now wife that it was filled again.
i know those feelings of powerlessness. western medicine builds itself up to have us believe that it can cure any disease, fix any ill. and yet, for all of our knowledge, so many things are out of our hands.
i just finished another book, called "resilience" by Alonzo Mourning. He is an NBA basketball player who was hit with kidney disease. he had to have a transplant to live. in his book, he references one book and one DVD that may help with the powerlessness feelings: "Eat to Live" by Dr. Joel Fuhrman and DVD's "Cancer doesn't Scare Me Anymore" by Dr. Lorraine Day.
"Eat to Live" is "so amazing that it well almost anybody with any medical condition to start reversing their condition"
"Cancer Doesn't Scare Me Anymore" "healed herself of invasive breast cancer when she was dying...She's developed a ten-step program that anyone can follow...the first item on the list is diet; the second one, exercise. She says the most important thing- and I try to teach this to my patients too- is that you absolutely have to believe and remember that it's God will to heal anything and everything. Without that belief, you're not going far"
These might help you, as just sitting by can often be difficult. Taking action like this might just help.
Never give up hope.
God Bless you, your husband, and your father-in-law, may he heal your father-in-law and bring peace to your family.
first of all, let me say that I am truly sorry.
i lost my mother to breast cancer back in '99 when i was 25, and my father has been recovering/ dealing with a blood cancer for the past 3 years. i'm now 34, just got married, and we have a baby on the way in May.
i don't know if this one would be right for you, but i'm reading a book right now called "Forgive for Good", and its idea is to be forgiving and not to hold grudges.
to explain what i mean: i think that i still hold a grudge against God for taking my Mom from me, my sister, and most of all my father when we were just getting started with our lives.
i think i hold a grudge against God for now having my father have to deal with cancer.
Reading this book now, I understand that although understandably a wrong, me holding a grudge does nothing to cure the situation; it does not bring my mother back or heal my father. what it does do is weigh me down with burdens that are beyond my understanding.
there are so many different ways to go with this and i certainly do not want to come across as the expert here.
i really want to offer you some small comfort in knowing that you, and your husband are not alone.
losing my mother left a huge, dark, empty hole in my heart for many years. it was not until i met my now wife that it was filled again.
i know those feelings of powerlessness. western medicine builds itself up to have us believe that it can cure any disease, fix any ill. and yet, for all of our knowledge, so many things are out of our hands.
i just finished another book, called "resilience" by Alonzo Mourning. He is an NBA basketball player who was hit with kidney disease. he had to have a transplant to live. in his book, he references one book and one DVD that may help with the powerlessness feelings: "Eat to Live" by Dr. Joel Fuhrman and DVD's "Cancer doesn't Scare Me Anymore" by Dr. Lorraine Day.
"Eat to Live" is "so amazing that it well almost anybody with any medical condition to start reversing their condition"
"Cancer Doesn't Scare Me Anymore" "healed herself of invasive breast cancer when she was dying...She's developed a ten-step program that anyone can follow...the first item on the list is diet; the second one, exercise. She says the most important thing- and I try to teach this to my patients too- is that you absolutely have to believe and remember that it's God will to heal anything and everything. Without that belief, you're not going far"
These might help you, as just sitting by can often be difficult. Taking action like this might just help.
Never give up hope.
God Bless you, your husband, and your father-in-law, may he heal your father-in-law and bring peace to your family.
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Guest
vahorsegrl-sorry to hear about your father in law. I would say pray and believe he is healed. Just take each day as it comes. Accept the anxiety, do not fight it. Remember though you dictate to your circumstances, do not let them dictate to you. You hold the key. You just need to show your husband compassion and patience. He will go through many emotions I am sure. One book I can think of only now is "Battlefield of the Mind" by Joyce Meyer. I hope and pray that Jesus put a blanket of comfort over all your family and your father in law is healed in Jesus Holy Name.
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Guest
Thanks Paul and Wolverine. Just nice to be able to reach out and get support. It's really hard to be able to feel like you are there for someone when all the stress and anxiety feels like it is coming back. And while this is such a stressful situation for even "normal" family members it just is really scary to feel these symptoms again. Also hard to know that no matter what you do, this is not going to have a good ending.