Social Anxiety

[jess18764]

I'm 17 and ive had social anxiety as long as i remember. I always hate waking up in the morning to go to school. I get so nervous and i get stressed out over what i should wear EVERY DAY. When I am actually at school i try to deal with it one class at a time, but it's so hard. It's not that I hate talking to people. It just scares me so much. I always feel like im being judged every time im looked at by somebody. I don't even like my mom looking at me, I just hate being looked at. And when i talk to people i never look into their eyes i stare at their mouth because its to scary for me to look into their eyes. And every time i feel like ive made a mistake (like said something that sounds stupid, or looked stupid) i beat myself up, i tell myself how stupid i am. And these mistakes never leave my head, theyre always with me. Some times random things will triger the memory (like songs, places, people, etc.) And then il beat myself up again until the thought goes away. Oh being in the hallway at school is the worst, there are so many people walking past me looking at me it makes me feel terrible. I just wish i was invisible. It's also pretty hard to not be seen cus im pretty tall compared to people at my school. Right now i dont have any friends. My bestfriend stopped talking to me and my boyfriend broke up with me because theyre tired of my anxiety. I dont talk to my parents much its just awkward. Oh and i cant even talk on the phone to people because it scares me to much..

Anyways i was wondering if any of yall go through the same thing? It would be nice to have somebody to talk to about it.

[coachchris]

Hi Jess,

My name is Chris, I am a coach here at Stress. Thank you for the post. So sorry to hear about the breakup. My heart goes out to you. I am curious to know if you have the program and have you ever had any counseling or therapy?

I am going to PM you some selftalk that will help get your self-esteem growing.

I look forward to your reply. You are not alone. There is help and hope.

We are here for you!
Coach Chris StressCenter.com

[jess18764]

Thanks for responding, i feel so alone right now. Yes i have the program, i havent been using it because i feel like its just not helping me at all. All it does is make me more foccused on my anxiety and just makes me feel so much worse. I did see this one therapist a couple of times, i didnt like it at all though i was so scared. I couldnt talk without shaking and almost crying. I dont think she was a very good therapist she didnt seem like she cared at all. And i know she is suppose to ask me a bunch of questiions and stuff so she can understand, but i hate that. Im not very good with puting my thoughts into words and it just never comes out right. So i stopped seeing her.

[coachchris]

Hi Jess,

I am going to private message you some selftalk I want you to read through twice daily.

I would also like you to message me 5 things that make you valuable and 5 things that are positive in your life.
If you need help with this I am here for you.

You're not alone.
Coach Chris StressCenter.com

[jess18764]

Well I went to my doctor and now i'm taking antidepressants and I feel much better.

[Cowgirljo]

Im looking for something lucida has written or CD on Social Anxiety...............I have dealt with it pretty good. And now hav card parties at my house. Put out a deck of cards and start playing. Then I can talk to everyone. I am not the super hostess .......& I tell people that make ur own drink & serve ur self.
But I hav a girl friend that we are like blood sisters. I hav a fear of friendship. It is hard for m becaue her life has so much ups and downs

[coachchris]

Panic to Power is a great book for that You can also find the program on itunes if you want to look through that.

[Lilly85]

Hi Jess, I experienced the same thing in high school. I had panic attacks and dreaded going to school everyday. I used to make myself sick. It's good that the antidepressants are working for you. Now would be a great time to work on the program when you are feeling better. Medication never worked for me. I felt the same way about the program the first time that it made me feel worse by focusing on my anxiety. Then I realized when I tried to run from it went with me. It sounds like you are on the right path. I wish you the best of luck.

[dannyv26]

Hi Jess. I.can really relate to you by being scared.talking to people. I have that problem what im talking to someone and its like I should say this or that and I just get more anxiety.. I feel stupid when I talk to people cause I feel like im not a good talker.. I guess I try to impress people alot and well it puts me down. I think its just us thinking too much that we put our selfs down idk im like in a funk. But im trying to stay strong amd trying to get better I hope you are too.. Try to stay positive any little positive thought can help you feel better.

Danny,

[allenae9]

Talking with people is what triggers my panic attacks. I am lucky to have a handful of people i'm comfortable with. The program has helped me a lot and i'm only on session 7 and I bought the program in 2008! I also stray away from the program but then i get into deep depressions and come right back to the program. So far I have found Session 3,4, and 6 to be tremendously helpful in getting me to deal with people in a direct way. One day I challenged myself to smile to a stranger when passing by, it was a beautiful experience. Good luck to you!

P.S. thank you for sharing your age. I am 22 and dealt with depression and anxiety most of my life, and still do. I used to wonder how I could be dealing with this condition with having such little "life experience". It never goes away but the program teaches you how to live with it so that it works in your benefit and isn't disabling.