Hello all,
I am just beginning Session 8 and I have been doing very well throughout the program. My anxiety certainly isn't gone, but I haven't had an attack since starting, I have driven on the freeway several times and survived both a dentist and doctor's appointment. I am now in the process of buying my first house and I am feeling a lot of anxiety about it. Some days I know it is excitement but others I am not so sure. I am doing this on my own so I am not sharing this experience with anyone and I am feeling a bit overwhelmed with it. Is this what everyone, even those without a disorder, feels? I am even having "what if" thoughts about signing the title papers next week. Any thoughts are welcome.
Tony
Home Buying Anxiety
Hey chuckie, my anxiety got really bad after we bought our first house last year. I didnt' want to believe the 2 were connected but it only makes sense. Buying a house is a huge step. My advice would be to visualize yourself in your new house, getting it exacty how you want it. Use your mind to create good feelings and especially use lesson 3 I think it is about using positive self talk. It is amazing how our mind works and the best part is, you can make it work for you, not against. It does take practice, at least for me it did but it was fun to challenge myself to think positively instead of thinking the worst. Set good intentions for signing day, go in there w/a great attitude and don't let fear get ahold of you, it has no place in your life, especially on that day!! Good luck to you and congratulations.
I intend that I live my life in tranquility and peacefullness, free of unneccesary worries and beliefs.
I totally understand what your going through. My husband and I are also in the process of buying our first home. Please beleive that it is a very postive step and don't let fear get in the way. I must admit fear + negative thinking has stepped in several times. To the point where we have been out house shopping several times now all the houses look the same. I think a lot has to do with indeoendence and thinking can I really do this, but with everything else you have to try and there is no such thing as failure. I think my problem is I think of the purchasing of the house as my expense because I will be carrying the most of the expense as I make more than my hubby and he has more expenses than I do. So when we go house shopping he is thinking family as he has two kids from another relationship that will visit on occasion. Where I am looking for trendy and fun as I have no kids. Well I wish you all the best, and congrats on doing it alone, you should be proud of yourself. When I got my first apartment I was on top of the world it was the greatest feeling. Take care.
"To thy ownself be true".
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StevenFarrisOhio
- Posts: 148
- Joined: Tue Sep 26, 2006 3:02 pm
Hey Chuckie,
First of all congrats to you on purchasing your first home, your right it is a cross between excitement and terror. I am a Realtor I deal with both buyers and sellers, and this is the one of the most stresful things you will do.
Having said that though, it is a wonderful investment as long as you are purchasing a home that is affordable for you.
I wish you the best of luck in your new home. Try not to let your emotions get in the way.
Debbie
First of all congrats to you on purchasing your first home, your right it is a cross between excitement and terror. I am a Realtor I deal with both buyers and sellers, and this is the one of the most stresful things you will do.
Having said that though, it is a wonderful investment as long as you are purchasing a home that is affordable for you.
I wish you the best of luck in your new home. Try not to let your emotions get in the way.
Debbie
As long as you're not building or buying new lol. I'm saying that because getting this new modular home has been the worst experience for me and my husband. We've bought 2 other houses that were 4 yrs old each one and was a good experience. I think you'll do well. Does it have the yard in already. When my daughter bought her first home it was a great experience. In giving it up,she cried. They just bought another home (she's in real estate) I know she'll have good memories there too as we hopefully will EVENTUALLY.
I completely understand. My wife and I bought our first house a little over two years ago. I was stressed out and anxious the whole time. The night we heard our offer was accepted my wife was exstatic and I went into panic.
Try to stay calm and realize this is your FIRST home. Don't try to put the pressure on yourself that you must know how to do everything (handy) to fix the house when you need to. You probably don't expect that out of yourself about your car - it's a learning experience and people out there can help you if you let them. Also, don't be a perfectionist with how the house looks inside or out. It's not going to be perfect, but it can be a wonderful place to live and relax as you make it yours and fix up / change what you want. Enjoy this time and view it as excitement. Congrats and Best of Luck to you!
Try to stay calm and realize this is your FIRST home. Don't try to put the pressure on yourself that you must know how to do everything (handy) to fix the house when you need to. You probably don't expect that out of yourself about your car - it's a learning experience and people out there can help you if you let them. Also, don't be a perfectionist with how the house looks inside or out. It's not going to be perfect, but it can be a wonderful place to live and relax as you make it yours and fix up / change what you want. Enjoy this time and view it as excitement. Congrats and Best of Luck to you!
Thank you everyone for your comments and support.
I am signing tomorrow and should start moving in on Tuesday. Anxiety comes and goes, no attacks though, and I am doing alright with it.
What is interesting to me, and this may be a whole new topic, for a couple of days this week it looked like I might not get the house. I was very stressed and worried but no anxiety.
My anxiety seems to come when my life is dull and boring. It's like my head looking for something negative to dwell on when there isn't anything there. When I am really stressed, I know this is bad, but I feel very alive. Now, I have had stress related anxiety before, but as I go through this program I realize it is when I don't feel in control of that stress. If I can control it, I thrive on it and work myself to the bone. In the big picture, I am sure this all adds to the problem. Duh. I need and am learning to relax and enjoying it. But it isn't easy. Hopefully it will be easier in my new, built in the 40's, house after I fix what needs fixing, get the garden in good shape, expand out into the back yard,etc.
Thanks again,
Tony
I am signing tomorrow and should start moving in on Tuesday. Anxiety comes and goes, no attacks though, and I am doing alright with it.
What is interesting to me, and this may be a whole new topic, for a couple of days this week it looked like I might not get the house. I was very stressed and worried but no anxiety.
My anxiety seems to come when my life is dull and boring. It's like my head looking for something negative to dwell on when there isn't anything there. When I am really stressed, I know this is bad, but I feel very alive. Now, I have had stress related anxiety before, but as I go through this program I realize it is when I don't feel in control of that stress. If I can control it, I thrive on it and work myself to the bone. In the big picture, I am sure this all adds to the problem. Duh. I need and am learning to relax and enjoying it. But it isn't easy. Hopefully it will be easier in my new, built in the 40's, house after I fix what needs fixing, get the garden in good shape, expand out into the back yard,etc.
Thanks again,
Tony