Does anyone just have those days where nothing goes right and no matter what you can't get out of the dumps. Well I am this whole week. My husband doesn't understand and just gets upset, which makes me feel worse. I am questioning the help that this program can give me. I feel hopeless and just can't seem to get back up. I have dealt with this my whole life, I don't know any other way to be. Is there any thing different? Where do I start when I don't see and end? Life just sucks and this is the way its always been and I guess will always be. I'm just sick and tired of being sick and tired.
I guess I'm just venting, but I'm also asking for help. I'm lost, I didn't know where else to go. If nothing else, just pray for me.
thank you for "listening" to my whining.
I just want to quit everything
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Guest
Juli68,
I think that I've been where you are now. I haven't been there for a very long time, but I've been there.
I believe that this program can help both of us. I need to change my thinking; I'm too negative. I expect too much of myself; I'm a perfectionist. I have low self-esteem; I find it hard to believe that I have value beyond what I may do for others.
You wrote, "...this is the way it's always been and I guess will always be." I believe that it is up to us to determine that. Nothing will change if I don't change my thoughts, and my behavior. If I continue to feed myself negative thoughts, then my life probably won't get any better. But if I change my pattern, even a little bit, and talk to myself in a compassionate, supportive way, as I would do for a friend, then I believe that there is reason to hope that life will get better, and keep getting better, as I become more skilled in telling myself that I'm Ok, even if I'm not perfect.
I believe that the program can help us to make positive changes in our lives. I hope that it works for you. I'm not looking forward to doing all of the work that the program calls for, but I am looking forward to having a happier life, and I believe that this program will help me to achieve that goal.
BFG
I think that I've been where you are now. I haven't been there for a very long time, but I've been there.
I believe that this program can help both of us. I need to change my thinking; I'm too negative. I expect too much of myself; I'm a perfectionist. I have low self-esteem; I find it hard to believe that I have value beyond what I may do for others.
You wrote, "...this is the way it's always been and I guess will always be." I believe that it is up to us to determine that. Nothing will change if I don't change my thoughts, and my behavior. If I continue to feed myself negative thoughts, then my life probably won't get any better. But if I change my pattern, even a little bit, and talk to myself in a compassionate, supportive way, as I would do for a friend, then I believe that there is reason to hope that life will get better, and keep getting better, as I become more skilled in telling myself that I'm Ok, even if I'm not perfect.
I believe that the program can help us to make positive changes in our lives. I hope that it works for you. I'm not looking forward to doing all of the work that the program calls for, but I am looking forward to having a happier life, and I believe that this program will help me to achieve that goal.
BFG
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Guest
hi juli,
i feel the same way. it's like i'm stuck in a hole in the sand-when i try to reach up and climb out, the sand just falls on my head instead of helping me out. i'm really encouraged by this website and great people like BFG though-if all these people are able to get out of their holes even a little bit, there sure is help for me, and you, yet. when i'm feeling particularly like "this is the way it's always been and i guess it's never gonna change", i try to pick a moment, even if it was just a few minutes, when i was happy or calm or relieved or positive in some way. i think of that moment and it reminds me that YES, i AM capable of experiencing something other than negative emotions. it doesn't have to be big. sometimes it's just remembering how i felt when i watched a movie i liked or when someone smiled at me. it's important stuff to remember when we're clouded with unhappiness.
i hope we both can find our way with the help of this program and through our own personal strength.
GOOD LUCK TO YOU!
i feel the same way. it's like i'm stuck in a hole in the sand-when i try to reach up and climb out, the sand just falls on my head instead of helping me out. i'm really encouraged by this website and great people like BFG though-if all these people are able to get out of their holes even a little bit, there sure is help for me, and you, yet. when i'm feeling particularly like "this is the way it's always been and i guess it's never gonna change", i try to pick a moment, even if it was just a few minutes, when i was happy or calm or relieved or positive in some way. i think of that moment and it reminds me that YES, i AM capable of experiencing something other than negative emotions. it doesn't have to be big. sometimes it's just remembering how i felt when i watched a movie i liked or when someone smiled at me. it's important stuff to remember when we're clouded with unhappiness.
i hope we both can find our way with the help of this program and through our own personal strength.
GOOD LUCK TO YOU!
Yep! Been There 
As a perfectionist...it has helped me at the end of the day to write three SUCESSES at the end of the day. Tonight I called only one person after 9:00 p.m. My goal is no calls after 9:00 so I can reach that goal of getting to bed by 10:30! I blew it tonight BUT I'll eventually achieve this goal by doing it in small increments. Limiting my activities to 15 minutes each day also helps. Keep a checklist of how much time you spend on each activity. Eating, driving, computer time (that's a biggie),making a decision, exercise (it doesn't have to be 15,30, or 45 min to start...FIVE minutes is a good step in that direction. Hope I answered your question. Also, take your name and write a positive character trait next to each letter. Watch the corners of your mouth turn upward! 
As a perfectionist...it has helped me at the end of the day to write three SUCESSES at the end of the day. Tonight I called only one person after 9:00 p.m. My goal is no calls after 9:00 so I can reach that goal of getting to bed by 10:30! I blew it tonight BUT I'll eventually achieve this goal by doing it in small increments. Limiting my activities to 15 minutes each day also helps. Keep a checklist of how much time you spend on each activity. Eating, driving, computer time (that's a biggie),making a decision, exercise (it doesn't have to be 15,30, or 45 min to start...FIVE minutes is a good step in that direction. Hope I answered your question. Also, take your name and write a positive character trait next to each letter. Watch the corners of your mouth turn upward! "Common things occur commonly. Uncommon things don't. Therefore, when you hear hoofbeats, think horses, not zebras." -- C.J. Peters
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Guest
Hi Julie ! Just hang in there ! I know all to well what you are going through, and I'm praying for you. Try and do the program no matter how you feel. It does eventually work, even though it seems like it doesn't. I have been dealing with depression and anxiety for 30 years. I have times when I have and still do feel like saying I've always been this way and what the heck, but don't give in to those thoughts. You will get better. It's an on going process, we are such sensitive people. Where I live, it's dismal and gray right now, so I try and get out the house as much as possible. Excercise works wonders. Try and walk at the mall. Just being around other people makes you feel more in touch, even if you don't know them. I know it's such an alone feeling, but remember you're not alone. I hope you feel better soon ! Take care, Bonnie
hi julie,
I'm where you are too and it really does suck! It happened the same way last year too and so it is even scarier this time though everyone tells me it should be easier now. I have a horribly negative way of thinking due to my past and how people have treated me all my life. I know I have succeeded in the past, but I feel like I'm not even that same person anymore and now that I'm a mom, everything seems so hard and I worry constantly that I am going to damage my son forever. I'm starting the program with hope and I can say that now because I always start to feel a bit better in the evening, but then dread going to bed for another restless night and dreadful wake-up to start it all over again. I hope it can work for both of us. Good luck sweetie!
I'm where you are too and it really does suck! It happened the same way last year too and so it is even scarier this time though everyone tells me it should be easier now. I have a horribly negative way of thinking due to my past and how people have treated me all my life. I know I have succeeded in the past, but I feel like I'm not even that same person anymore and now that I'm a mom, everything seems so hard and I worry constantly that I am going to damage my son forever. I'm starting the program with hope and I can say that now because I always start to feel a bit better in the evening, but then dread going to bed for another restless night and dreadful wake-up to start it all over again. I hope it can work for both of us. Good luck sweetie!
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Guest
when you are depressed it seems that nothing will ever change and nobody can help you. If you can muster up just enough energy to tell yourself that just for today I will try something different. Just for today I will work the program or exercise for 5 minutes or whatever. Then really think about it and get up and do it. I know it is sooo hard when all you want to do is sleep or watch tv. I know that for me tv is all I want to do. I can't move from it sometimes and the more I watch the more I don't do anything else, the more depressed I get. I got to work today after 2 full days of that and told a co-worker who had asked me that yes I will finally joing that gym with her. I do not want to. I really really don't. I am scared because she wants to go early and I am not an early bird. We both get home from work at 1:30am and she wants to go at 9:30. I get scared if I don't get a straight 8 hours. I guess I will have to take a nap later. All of my sisters and my parents are on a diet. They are calling it the biggest loser diet and everyone of them has lost 7lbs, or 5lbs. Me I lost 1/2 pound and wanted to quit. But I know I can't because then I will be a loser. I ate so much yesterday it is not even funny. I sat and watched tv today before work and finally got up and made a salad for work. I kept thinking that I need to do something. I am always stuck and don't do anything. I want to lose weight so bad though. I know I will feel better if i can just get out of my house. The exercise will make it even better. I will take it slow and easy. I know it will make me feel better and more in control. That is key. Feeling like you have some control over your life. Like everyone here says don't beat yourself up positive dialog. That is hard sometimes, but just keep listening to the tapes. To the workbook slowly if you have to. I am still at the beginning, and have had the tapes since mid December. Keep telling yourself that you will do it. The guilt is what motivates me sometimes. But I am trying to stay positive and let the positivity guide me. Easier said than done. I have no support. Nobody in my family really understands. I have to be my own support with the help of all of you.
Well enough chit chat. I will pray for all of you. PLEASE PRAY FOR ME! I NEED ALL THE HELP I CAN GET.
HOPEFULL
Well enough chit chat. I will pray for all of you. PLEASE PRAY FOR ME! I NEED ALL THE HELP I CAN GET.
HOPEFULL