Growth Spurt

Faith_TX · Post by **Faith_TX** » Wed Jul 09, 2008 7:56 am

I have been doing a lot better. DH and I are getting along great and I have had a lot less anxiety. I have still had some times before my period this month where I felt I was a bit keyed up and sort of fussed at the kids more than I'd like. But, I'm working on that.

Anyway, last night out of the blue I started feeling dizzy and like I was going to throw up. I thought it was a stomach bug or something but after I laid dawn awhile and realized my thoughts were going haywire, I'm thinking that maybe it was anxiety (or I ate something funky and the tummy thing triggered anxiety. . .who knows?)

I was glad in a way that I didn't recognize it right away, because that meant I wasn't looking for it like I used to do all the time.

But, I'm a bit unnerved about it today. I'm still feeling sort of jittery and have had more anxiety than usual today. Hubby tells me blow it off it was just a bad day.

I'm fighting thoughts of worrying if "it" will come back like it was . . . and trying to remind myself I have a lot more tools now than I did. I have been enjoying feeling better. I've had some moments where I have felt so filled with joy I almost feel like I'm on a high . . . I haven't felt that good in a long time. (and fought thoughts of "oh no maybe I'm having a manic episode!") I have been able to focus more especially at work.

I had my annual and my doctor even commented that I looked more relaxed than I had in years.

Any suggestions for times like this? I want to make the most of this "practice" but not get to hung up on it, if you know what I mean.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Jul 09, 2008 8:08 am

Hi Faith. Thanks for your post. You are not alone in the way you are feeling. I am feeling the same way you are today, in that I feel as though I have come so far and have been doing so well with the program, then the last few days have been miserable. I am trying distractions and to not let it bother me, but am now feeling lost as to how to turn the tides. I too would welcome some suggestions, on how to get through difficult times.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Jul 09, 2008 8:26 am

Chris: I can relate! I started a whole thread under Week 15 asking permission to have a bad day. I think your hubby is right. Try not to over-analyze the whole thing. Maybe you did have a bug or errant hormones or who knows what that started your mind going, or maybe it was a bout of anxiety. Who knows? So What if it was? The important thing is that you are moving forward in the long run. I recognize your fear about "it" coming back. Recently I had "it" start to come back for me. I feel this generalized buzzing in my body, sort of feels like electriciy in my blood, I'm nervous and a little hyper, and always before it spiraled until I couldn't sleep and things were REALLY out of control. But this last time, I welcomed the anxiety as my body trying to tell me something. Try not to be afraid of it, and try not to over-analyze everything. Accept it: OK I was doing better, and I had a few days that I didn't like so much. It doesn't mean anything. Everyone has bad days. You can turn those thoughts around until you feel better. Good luck!
formerly sleeplessMom

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Jul 09, 2008 8:33 am

Thanks Sleepless Mom for your reply. You said something that really helped me...to not be afraid and to listen to the anxiety. I think the lesson here to be learned is to immediately stop the negative thinking, take a step back,and to take a few minutes of quiet time to think about what is really causing you anxiety. Not all the what if's that follow, but rather determining what triggered you in the first place. Is it an insecurity? A fear? Then, from there, that can be addressed. And I think just knowing then determining the cause could provide some relief and enable you to develop a plan of attack to address the cause.

Hang in there!

Jolie1976 · Post by **Jolie1976** » Wed Jul 09, 2008 8:34 am

Originally posted by sleeplessMom:
Recently I had "it" start to come back for me. I feel this generalized buzzing in my body, sort of feels like electriciy in my blood, I'm nervous and a little hyper, and always before it spiraled until I couldn't sleep and things were REALLY out of control. But this last time, I welcomed the anxiety as my body trying to tell me something.

That really makes sense. I can feel myself sort of "winding up" for example I find myself going onto my email "checking" it more. . .surfing the net researching different things. . . instead of just living my life. When I start doing that I need to be sure to slow down and figure out what's getting to me.

Today I found myself checking email a bunch and then I said "enough" and made myself wait another hour to check it (I'm on a computer all day for work so it's tempting) and just doing that one small thing made me feel more in control.

As this day is going on I'm feeling better and better.

The book by Liebgold has some good stuff about the "Boo voice" and how we just need to ignore it and remember any time we hear "it" talking to us, it's just lying. Ignore it.

That knowledge has helped me a lot.

RamonaIA · Post by **RamonaIA** » Wed Jul 09, 2008 8:38 am

Originally posted by Jennifer Y:
I think the lesson here to be learned is to immediately stop the negative thinking, take a step back,and to take a few minutes of quiet time to think about what is really causing you anxiety. Not all the what if's that follow, but rather determining what triggered you in the first place. Is it an insecurity? A fear? Then, from there, that can be addressed. And I think just knowing then determining the cause could provide some relief and enable you to develop a plan of attack to address the cause.

Hang in there!

This is true to some extent, but I find if I try to "figure it all out" when I'm feeling anxiety, it just makes me feel more intrenched. I try to just get busy with my day and ignore it. Maybe do some comfort measures if I need them. Then, when I'm calmer, if there's something I need to address, that's OK.

But for me trying to figure out what caused my anxiety to begin with is a huge trap of thoughts and obsessing.

My husband was telling me. . .who cares? If your stomach is bothering you because of something you ate or because you are anxious. Just lay down for awhile until you feel better, and hopefully tomorrow you'll feel better.

However, for me, once I realized it was just anxiety, I got up from the bed and started doing a little laundry, because I had been layign there thinking thinking thinking until I make myself crazy. LOL

I'm so glad I have a job where I get paid to analyze stuff. I would probably do it for free!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Jul 09, 2008 8:49 am

Chris, I agree and can relate. I do the same thing with keeping myself busy when I feel anxious--buzzing around the house doing a million and one things. For me though, I know when I am doing that, that I am anxious and avoiding something that is bothering me. So, hopefully some day, i can get to the point where I can cut out the hours of busy work, and begin to address the heart of the anxiety sooner, before I go on my cleaning spree and physically make myself tired. What a great day that will be!!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Jul 09, 2008 8:57 am

You know what? You're right. . .and there is a fine line between distraction and getting the thoughts to slow down, and denial. .LOL

Today in a calmer moment I talked through with a friend what was REALLY bothering me. It helped a lot. It had to do with me finding out that a cousin has a mental illness. . . a phobia of mine, and now someone in the family. . .eek!

But, this doesn't change where I'm at, i can't let it. She's getting help for it and hopefully will be better soon. Her problems go beyond a few panic attacks, unfortunately.

Also I wasnt' looking forward to my review here at work today. So glad that's over!

PLUS, a big deadline due Friday.

And so why am I online posting to message boards you ask? hahaha I have no idea!

Oh look how pretty the clouds are out the window! Oh look. .. a shiney thing!. . . .I love distraction

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Jul 09, 2008 8:59 am

It was good chatting with you...Have a great day! Hope you feel better.

Time for me to go enjoy the outdoors.