Obsessing or Dealing and how to stay in the healthy thoughts

lilsismj · Post by **lilsismj** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 12:55 am

Ok everybody, I don't know now if I'm obsessing or dealing...making things worse or better. I feel worse. I woke up this morning in a cold sweat at about 7 and I'm feeling other anxiety symptoms that seem out of control.

I am trying to deal with my sticky situation. I went and bought a book about falling out of love. I've posted. And, now I've found myself in what feels like a great deal of distress.

I am so afraid that things are never going to be ok again!

I am afraid that I am going to have to leave my job and all the success and friends I've made there.

I am afraid that these feelings are not going to get better as long as I still see him.

I am afraid that this is going to send me over the edge.

I feel, right now, like I've never even done this program and that I am back at the very beginning.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 3:17 am

You're going to be fine. It's just the situation that you are in is going to be awkward for a while. You offered your ego a carrot (the forbidden one) and then you told it that it couldn't have it. Your ego is fighting mad because it didn't get something it wanted. You need to be firm with it. Don't let it send you thoughts of guilt or negative what ifs. What if you went to work on Monday and acted as if nothing ever happened? You will get through this. There will be a lot of awkward moments at work (trust me I've been in your situation) but eventually they go away. Don't punish yourself, you have done nothing wrong. Go out and enjoy the things you like to do. Pamper yourself, but stay busy this weekend. No more obsessing over this. Good Luck.
Julie

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 3:27 am

Thank you Julie,

I have been surprised by the people who seem to have been through a similar situation, and have been open enough to share about it.

I feel like I am amplifying everything right now and the last thing I want to do is build up the energy to distract myself.

epa · Post by **epa** » Sat Mar 29, 2008 6:59 am

I could have written that post. All my phrases start with I am afraid I written 20 of them with ease in my journal the other day. I have the same fears that it will never be okay again.

Don't beat yourself up about this I know it's hard I am telling you the advice I can't even use myself. I read this concerning these situations and this point hit home for me it gave me the feeling that it was going to be ruff but okay in the end. This was step #5

5) She should ask God for patience--TONS of it--because her painful withdrawal from her friend would most likely take several months or more. She knew she could expect to feel worse before she felt better, that going "through it" not "around it" was absolutely the right way to get where she wanted to be, but that route would be filled with sizable potholes.

I don't know if this helps but I thought it was good advice. I know our situations are not exactly the same but don't give up and also the more we think about it the more it's amplified and we loose energy we desperatly need for ourselves because we deserve go and pamper yourself like Julie said.