Looking for ANY advice, getting desperate.

[gordiehowehattrick]

Thanks for reading this as this post may be a bit winded. Let me begin, I am a 29 year old male with long history of OCD / Anxiety. I am currently on Anafranil and Lexapro. I guess my biggest problem is that I am a perfectionist; I want everything to be perfect; finances, relationships, EVERYTHING. My girlfriend of 2 years also deals with some anxiety issues. Her father doesn't want to be in her life and she hasn't really had it easy growing up; combined with some health issues is not well. We both exercise and eat healthy and we are trying our best but the last two weeks have been difficult for me. I have been down in the dumps and feeling the OCD once again. This time it pertains to my relationship; do I want to be with her?, do I not want to be with her? , etc? Has anyone had this. I love her and I want us Both to be happy because when we are, both our insecurities are gone and we get along great. I sometimes think I put too much pressure on her to be more social, go to the gym, do this, do that, should I really be doing this or should I mind my own business. She started this program and was doing great, I could tell, but once we returned from vacation, she didn't keep going. I haven't been that good at keeping the program going either so I guess I shouldn't say anything to her. Am I putting too much pressure on her? Do I need to fix myself first? We are both very sensitive to each other and this can cause problems. We don't really have many friends outside of each other as we are in a new city which I find can also cause problems. Thoughts? Advice?

[Guest]

Sometimes I get that way too, thinking, what about this, should I have done this, should I have done that. Lucinda's Stop What if thinking really helped me with that one especially with the words stop "shoulding yourself". It sounds like you and your girlfriend have a lot going for you. I wouldn't be too worried about what you could be doing or have done better. In my opinion, that when you worry like that you should be focusing on other things like personal housekeeping, finances, working towards your future career, possibly future family, paying off debts, things that will keep you focused on improving on your current situation. It seems you and your girlfriend just need some rest time instead of worry time. I find watching plays whether renting them from the library, or going out to see a musical really help and are very therapeutic. Maybe you will too. Good luck and Happy Thanksgiving this weekend.