So I know I'm not really big in this community and I bounce in and out of it periodically, but I could use some advice or a pep talk. I've said it before but I doubt anyone remembers me so I'll start by saying I was a completely a housebound agoraphobic for 5 years. I met a guy 2 years ago, got into a situation where i had no choice but to leave my house and eventually got to where I've taken trips across the state and I go out around the town. But I still only ride with certain people and i still get anxious sometimes.
I made a huge accomplishment in June and finally got my permit at 20 (now 21) years old. But I'm just now starting to drive and I've found that I'm not as anxious as I expected, but its a little difficult when I'm first getting in the car.
Now my problem: I've been a babysitter for the past couple of years because I'm still to anxious to get a job. But today I found out that the kids I watch are moving away and I will be without a job come January. So I'm stressing because I have bills I wont be able to pay and my family will be going hungry. It's actually crossing my mind that it's time to get a job outside the home, but it feels impossible. I'm so scared that I'll chicken out and wont make it out the door or that I'll have to quit or get fired because of my anxiety. I'm depressed because I don't have my license so I can't go anywhere on my own and being stuck in the house 24/7 is torture now. I know that my depression is caused by a mixture of being miserable with my job, stuck inside all day, no independence, and A few months ago I went through a bad breakup with my boyfriend of 2 years and I'm still feeling the hurt and betrayal from that. Even though I'm coping just fine with it, it still hurts sometimes. So my depression has reasonable causes and I think getting a job outside where I can connect with people my age and actually be out in the world would do wonders for me and my loneliness, but I just don't know how I'm going to be brave enough to do it. I haven't done the program yet. I've heard the first few tapes but I've pretty much done all of this completely on my own, this is just one hurtle I can't seem to jump. Has anyone else been in this kind of situation or have any advice?
-Chelsie
Need to find a first real job... SCARED!!
-
Guest
Hi Chelsie. Well the program teaches us that we just have to work through the discomfort and anxiety and do stuff anyway! Don't base decisions in your life because of fear! You might just find a great job that will move your life into a positive direction. Work through the discomfort and anxiety. you just have to do it! Think back in your life when you have had to draw on the strenght you had inside of you to get through a difficult time. It is still there. It is part of you! Good luck and God bless.
If anyone has had the same issue please tell me about it, i would like to not feel alone.My first panic attack came when my daugther was 3 months old i was falling asleep and i pictured her naked and then i had a panic attack and it went downhill from there,then i started to believe i was a lesbian bc i have had interactions with my friend when i was younger, a experimental stage if you will, but i always perferred the male over the female but like i said it was experimental then i freaked out about dying, choking ( lost 60 lbs bc i couldnt eat) had issues with my husband ( our sex life) or their lack of a sex life.If anyone has experienced this please contact me thank you!