I know I probably drove my friends in chat half crazy Monday & Tuesday morning trying to decide what to do. I called Darla at the center, talked to her, but even before talking to anyone I knew what had to be done, deep inside I already had my answer. There are times in this life that we have no choice, we can’t avoid a certain situation because of the anxiety and/or depression, we just have to go out and do the job that’s before us. At 11:30 am Tuesday January 15 2008 I took on a journey that I had no idea if I could honestly do it or not. I got in the car, drove out of the driveway, over to Cincinnati Ohio and picked up interstate 75 southbound with all the ‘what if’s in the world’ running through my head.
Below is a record of a journey both south then back north again. At times it felt like an endless journey to a world I hadn’t been to in a long, long time but I’m extremely happy that I made this journey.
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This morning I started south on interstate 75 southbound I thought maybe it would be good to keep some sort of record of the trip when I could, so I’ve grabbed a piece of paper and am going to start recording the following at Athens TN…
Southbound to Naples Florida (1100 miles)
January 15 2008
Left Milan Indiana at: 11:30 am
Athens TN at 4:30 pm (keep driving David…just keep driving)
Chattanooga TN 6:20 pm (beautiful sunset coming)
Atlanta at 8:05 pm (I could have done without that speeding ticket Sir!)
Macon GA 9:30 pm (Into the night I go…)
Florida Line: 11:35 pm (well made it this far...traffic is light)
Lake City FL: 12:20 am
Gainesville FL: 1:00 am
Ocala FL: 1:45 am (getting tired…keep driving David…keep going)
Tampa FL: 3:10 am (Daylight has to come soon...lonely out here)
Naples FL: 6:45 am (Finally!!! Next exit!)
Sunrise! 7:14 am (A new day dawns – just hope everything goes ok today, so tired I don’t even know who I am anymore.)
Hospital: 7:25 am
South Run: 20 hrs
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Northbound: 1/17/08 – 1100 miles
Left dad’s at: 8:45 pm…North Naples
Naples to Tampa: 11:15 pm – Rain & Fog
Dade City: 12:00 am Rain & Fog running slow…50 to 55 mp
Ocala: 1:15 am – Fog clearing finally!
Gainesville: 1:50 am – Fuel stop – clear skies – dry road
Jennings FL – State Line FL/GA: 3:30 am Southern Georgia run – desolate & lonely.
Atlanta GA: 7:45 am (Rush HOUR! & a text message, LMAO!)
Dalton GA to Cleveland TN – Used connector short cut 9:00 am (12 hrs on the road)
Knoxville TN: 10:30 am - Met sister at Mc D’s for food and a break.
Leaving Knoxville at 11:00 am
Caryville TN: 11:35 am (Ok who turned off the heat? Sure not in Florida anymore Toto!)
KENTUCKY: 12:10 pm (Hello Kentucky!…hmm getting tired, wonder why?)
Lexington KY: 1:50 pm (Still rollin’ thru the bluegrass state – pure sunshine and a smile)
Florence KY: 2:55 pm (Ok 29 degrees is fine but I think 80 is better!…Goodbye I-75)
Changed to I-275 at 3:00 pm – Next change is US 50 westbound.
Lawrenceburg IN at 3:20 pm: changed to US 50 westbound…1 more change.
Aurora IN at 3:28 pm: Turned onto St Hwy 350 – 15 Minutes from Home.
Home - Milan IN: 3:41 pm (at least the house is still standing!)
North Run = 19 hrs
Total Trip Mileage: 2207 miles (not including the miles in Naples and areas around it)
Total Interstate Drive Time: 38 hrs. (19 hrs each way with stops for food & gas only)
Music that I’ve heard so many times I know every word, chord and/or lead to each of them! Not in order shown! lol
1. 1. Fire on the Mountain – Marshall Tucker Band
2. Turn the Page – Bob Seger
3. Travellin’ Man – Beautiful Loser – Bob Seger
4. Lady – Styx – (one song that kept me going the entire trip both directions)
5. Pipeline – Stevie Ray Vaughan – (second song that really dug deep into me as I drove)
6. The Devil Went Down to Georgia – Charlie Daniels Band (perfect for Georgia)
7. Far Away – Nickelback (kept me going thru central and northern Florida)
8. Lookin’ for Love in All the Wrong Places (at least 50 times)
9. Ghost Riders in the Sky – Marshal Tucker Band (I know it by heart now)
10. Sixteen Tons – Johnny Cash
11. While My Guitar Gently Weeps – Jon Healey
12. Wonderful Tonight – Bob Seger
13. Susie Q – Credence Clearwater Revival
14. Sultan’s of Swing – Dire Straits
15. Pipeline – Stevie Ray Vaughan (Countless # of times & Volume Level 10 rollin’ back into Milan)
16. Unchained Melody – Everly Brothers – (ahhh 2:30 am..nice)
17. Look at Little Sister – Stevie Ray Vaughan – (Came out of Naples playing this…yes the beach girls were nice looking guys!)
18. Riders on the Storm – REO Speedwagon (What else for rain & storms?)
19. In Memory of Elizabeth Reed – Allman Brothers – (Great road song)
20. Freebird – Lynrnd Skynrd – (Try this anywhere and you’ll feel good)
21. Dude Looks Like a Lady – Aerosmith – (Played this at a redneck gas station in GA…got some strange looks but to tired to care!)
22. Cat Scratch Fever – Ted Nugent (4 states heard this at least 5x)
23. You Really Got Me Now – Outlaws – (Was on when the cop got me in GA…no comment…lol)
24. Light My Fire – Doors – (Cranking thru Northern Ky with this)
25. Southbound – Allman Brothers – (Great but needed one called Northbound too!)
26. Can’t You See – Marshall Tucker Band
27. And the one that rode with me for hundreds of miles, the one song that reminded me of the people I’ve gotten to know so well in the chat room, that I’ve become so close to and love so much…Life by the Drop – Stevie Ray Vaughan.
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A “thank you straight from my heart…straight from David” to the very special ladies who contacted me & answered my text messages, calls, voice mails, and even msn IM’s via cell phone. You were there when the miles got so long & lonely and I was so tired I just barely could see, and when I wasn’t sure why I even attempted this huge trip in the first place. You’ll never know how much you helped keep me moving on down the road…not even in your wildest dreams will you ever know.
The hardest times were the nights, when everyone I knew were sleeping…except me, but during those hours I had time to think about what I was doing and where I was headed, the amazing accomplishment that I was living at that moment…and knowing that…it put me on top of the world and kept me cranking further south or north, mile by mile, hour by hour with zero anxiety.
Now I know I can go anywhere, at anytime, no matter what the circumstances are without any hesitation, anxiety, or problems. Two years ago as of January 24th I stopped driving to the point I couldn’t even get in a car. Now…look what I have done! I’ve made a trip from my home here in Indiana to Naples Florida and back to Indiana again, over 2200 miles, in 4 days. I’ve spent a little over 39 hours on the road out of the 76 hours I was gone.
I have won, it took 2 years including the 1.5 years in StressCenter’s Anxiety Program to win this battle…(actually37 years total)…but I beat anxiety and depression into the ground by driving my heart out…literally. Nothing or anyone controls me now…only I control me. It’s an awesome feeling to finally be free!
I don’t ever want to hear the words “I can’t do this” again...from any of you, because you “can do it” the same as I did…it “can” be beat and it “will be beat” just keep moving forward all the time and don’t ever look back.
And what happened to mom? She came through the surgery without a problem. The doctor’s inserted two stints into the arteries near her heart and released her from the hospital at 5 pm Wednesday evening. When I left last night, she was doing great…to the point she told me it was time for David to go home.
Btw, I fly out of Cincinnati/Kentucky International Airport next Thursday, at 9:25 am, January 24 2008, exactly 2 years from the date I went totally down with anxiety, depression and a lock on my life for what I thought was forever. Why? My dad is to have heart surgery in Naples Florida at noon on Friday, January 25th.
This time…I will fly to Tampa Florida instead of driving the entire route. I’m picking up a 2007 Ford Mustang Convertible at the airport and driving it on into Naples…yes I’m treating myself to the best car I could find…I deserve it. It’s only been 33 years since I’ve flown but a 2 hour and 10 minute flight straight through + a 3 hr drive to Naples sounds a lot better than a 19 hour straight through drive doesn’t it?
Just me…Just David
Edited a groups name above for Cat Scratch Fever as pointed out by one of our chat members. lol Just a note while I'm thinking about it...most of my journal was written on pieces of Mc Donald bags because I didn't have this laptop with me. I put the journal together from those scraps of paper as I typed it into here. At one point, it looked like Ronald McDonald had a party in my car.
