I have a thought that I can't get rid of

sillymilly · Post by **sillymilly** » Sun Dec 28, 2008 5:02 am

I am even too ashamed, and scared to tell anyone about this thought I have. I have searched many forums about this thought and no one else has had it. This totally scares the H*** out of me. I am totally alone in this thought, what do I do?
If there was someone else out there who suffers with this, it would be different but I haven't heard of any. I don't know what to do?
I am starting to think that the devil is after me and starting to put this thought in my head. Bad thing is, I can't seem to tell, or verbalize this thought because it terrifies me

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Dec 28, 2008 5:34 am

I am so sorry that you are suffering with a scary obess. thought. They really stink. I am an obess. thinker and have had every scary thought I think could be thought. It's your anxiety that's causing them. You have latched onto this scary thought for whatever reason and now you are tormenting yourself with it.

Just try and use the 6 steps from session 2 and just keep practicing your breathing. When the thought comes just focus on the breathe. It really helps to practice your relaxation exercises. Then it will become automatic.

Don't beat yourself up over it. Tell yourself its just anxiety and breathe. This forum has wonderful tips on how ohers have handled their scary obess. thinking.

I wish you much success and peace now and in the New Year. Take care and God Bless.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Dec 28, 2008 7:05 am

bna,
thank you for posting, I was so afraid that no one would answer me, and I am still so afraid that no one else has had this thought. You are saying you have every thought there is, I definitely believe you, but because of the way I am feeling about it, Iam still scared and wondering if it includes the thought I have. It is so awful! I won't ask because I know this is soooooo personal and it is hard to bear. I do believe you, am so saddened that you are having these thoughts also, they are horrible and frightening.
I get so worried that the thoughts are either the devil, voices(schizoid), and if I have them any longer they will cause me to have a nervous breakdown. I feel so alone in this thought I was having but you are right about following the steps that Lucinda has pointed out to us. I will try really hard to do what you suggested to me. I live alone and sometimes walk around holding my head and praying out loud for this thought to go away, it does for a while then comes back. I pray and pray that we both will get thru this wicked thing.
You will never know how greatful I was to see that you posted to my message.
God Bless You!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Dec 28, 2008 8:24 am

i have obes. scary thoughts too. They are so annoying my big one is that i'll start seeing things and go crazy but i know thats not true and its just my anxitey playing with my head.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Dec 28, 2008 9:09 am

Remember... thoughts only thoughts. If you have thought it, someone out there has without a doubt thought it also. Just because you can't find someone to identify with, does not mean you are alone. Most of us who are going through or have been through the program seem to have obsessive and often scary thoughts. I recently graduated from the program and have found what works for me when having an obsessive moment. And I say "moment" because the more you practice your skills, the more these times become "moments" instead of months, weeks or days. This is what works for me: (1) Breathing is SO important. Remember the two-four breathing technique. I can't emphasize that enough. (2) Listen to what you are telling yourself. Remember, our mind does not know the difference between a real threat and an imagined one. Our bodies get to feel both. From your letter it sounds like you have yourself convinced your thought will make you breakdown. You CAN'T think yourself crazy. I know because before I learned the skills in the program, I tried for years and I never did go crazy!:) Instead of the negative "I'm going to have a breakdown if I don't stop thinking this thought". Comfort yourself. "I don't like this thought, it scares me. But I know it's only a thought and that I am ok. I'm going to distract myself and eventually it will lose its power". (3)Distract yourself! It's hard at first because our minds are obsessing and racing a mile a minute. Put yourself around other people who are happy and positive even if it's the local grocery store for a gallon of milk! It'll force you to smile. I find that when I laugh just to be polite, my feelings follow. I hope this helps. Remember, you are not alone. I and many many others have gone throught what you are going through and there is hope and healing. Grab onto this statement and hold it tight because you will see the truth of it as you continue to use the skills you are learning through the program. God Bless!

Brian 2 · Post by **Brian 2** » Sun Dec 28, 2008 9:09 am

I too have thoughts that torment me. In my case I imagine something over and over again. It is very intrusive.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Mar 25, 2009 12:56 am

i too didnt think that i could ever get help or that anyone was thinking the same way as me.,i could never tell anyone about what i was feeling ie counsellor as it was just to scary or i couldnt verbalise it in anyway and still cant to anyone. i convinced myself that i was going mad and i too have exactly the same thoughts as you and i thought i was the only one and was so relieved to here i am not alone in this way of thinking, it started for me reading an article in the paper about Britney spears and that she sometimes heres voices , then suddenly i became paranoid what if that happens to me, i became increasingly more anxious that night i lay awake shaking, and you say about the devil and i worried about schitzophrenia etc all sorts of horible thoughts came into my head, it was so so scary!!
I worked my myself up into a state , but can now say a few months on i have learnt that this is just a thought and it IS ANXIETY, the thought is there sometimes but i just imagine a red stop sign and i dont let myself think it or just float with it and not have an emotional response to it which is the key .
i can say this forum has helped so much its all about grabbing the tools and using them.
I still have bad days occasionaly but i beleive i am now getting better and am looking to improve my life by being stronger and more in control of my thoughts and thinking more positvely there is always a way out as a few months ago i couldnt see any light at all.
Anxiety is a horrible horrible thing but it can and will be conquered you have to believe that.