) and these last 2-3 'topics' have not been scary, but very depressive. Can we have obsessions that aren't scary, but are depressive? Is it the same thing, just in a different context? Can anyone relate?depressive obsessions?
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missobsessive
- Posts: 62
- Joined: Sun Feb 15, 2009 7:20 pm
ok...i've been feeling pretty depressed this week and may have just had one of those aha moments... I have a tendency to take things to extremes (don't we all ) and these last 2-3 'topics' have not been scary, but very depressive. Can we have obsessions that aren't scary, but are depressive? Is it the same thing, just in a different context? Can anyone relate?
) and these last 2-3 'topics' have not been scary, but very depressive. Can we have obsessions that aren't scary, but are depressive? Is it the same thing, just in a different context? Can anyone relate?-
Guest
I'm not sure exactly what you mean, but I am 99.9% done with scary obsessions, though I still find myself replaying and overanalyzing issues that concern me. It can be depressive because you keep analyzing, looking for answers, trying to predict, and ultimately missing the precious present moment. I find the same techniques used to combat scary thoughts can be used for any obsession. I tell myself, "STOP! BE IN THE MOMENT!" when my mind is reeling. Even, "Thoughts, just thoughts" helps. The most important is to, once again, reexamine my self talk and use positive replacement statements.
Is that what you're talking about?
Is that what you're talking about?
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Guest
Yeah...I do mean that...It's just that I've been through pretty much all the common scary thoughts and have moved on to other topics. I think the last time I had a truly, truly calm, no ocd obsessive thoughts mind was in 2007. The thoughts started to come back in late 2007, and I was trying to work through them, but then went through a major emotional trauma...losing my mom in June 2008 when I was just 23 yrs old--she was 51, and everything just crashed back down on me. I started doing better through counseling and everything, but then the 1 year anniversary came around, and I just went soaring back down hill, and have been struggling since then.
The thoughts I've been struggling with aren't really scary, but are more depressing than anxiety producing, although they definitely do make me anxious. They just go and go in my head constantly, and never stop. They might slow down at times, but they are always there. I'm just trying to get the motivation back to beat them and to know that they aren't going to ruin my life like I feel like they are going to...I just want to believe again that I can overcome this and live a full and happy life without being bombarded and controlled by OCD. The pure-O thoughts have really taken a toll on me over the past year...
Thanks for responding
The thoughts I've been struggling with aren't really scary, but are more depressing than anxiety producing, although they definitely do make me anxious. They just go and go in my head constantly, and never stop. They might slow down at times, but they are always there. I'm just trying to get the motivation back to beat them and to know that they aren't going to ruin my life like I feel like they are going to...I just want to believe again that I can overcome this and live a full and happy life without being bombarded and controlled by OCD. The pure-O thoughts have really taken a toll on me over the past year...
Thanks for responding
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Guest
I'm sorry about your mom; the both of you were pretty young, so that must have made losing a parent even harder. I think anyone would've had a hard time at the 1 year anniversary!
I find that even obsessing about ordinary events, like paying bills on time or holidays, brings on mild depression for me. I didn't realize just how much I do obsess until I went totally OCD then got this program!
Maybe we have to be okay with the fact that our minds will always reel, knowing we have some tools to wind ourselves down and get off the merry go round. Everyone else will sometimes find that they've slipped into angry moods, depression, or other negative thinking patterns, so why is it so bad for people like us to find, whoops, I'm spiraling again! It's just a sticky aspect of our analytical nature! The way we think is so great for multitasking, multifaceted problem solving and being creative, so it's not all bad.
You will rise above this and be happy! You're only having a hard time differentiating between irrational, magical thoughts from the truth of who you are. You can overcome your fears of these ideas whirling around in your head and find the courage to live your life! Stick with the program and trust yourself!!!
I find that even obsessing about ordinary events, like paying bills on time or holidays, brings on mild depression for me. I didn't realize just how much I do obsess until I went totally OCD then got this program!
Maybe we have to be okay with the fact that our minds will always reel, knowing we have some tools to wind ourselves down and get off the merry go round. Everyone else will sometimes find that they've slipped into angry moods, depression, or other negative thinking patterns, so why is it so bad for people like us to find, whoops, I'm spiraling again! It's just a sticky aspect of our analytical nature! The way we think is so great for multitasking, multifaceted problem solving and being creative, so it's not all bad.
You will rise above this and be happy! You're only having a hard time differentiating between irrational, magical thoughts from the truth of who you are. You can overcome your fears of these ideas whirling around in your head and find the courage to live your life! Stick with the program and trust yourself!!!
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Guest
missobsessive: I think I can really relate to what you are talking about. I consider myself "mostly recovered" and have gone through the program at least twice. I never had the obsessive scary thoughts like other people talk about, but I will fixate on a situation and re-think it and re-think it and go over and over it, especially if it is something depressing, then over time I get more anxious and more depressed (no duh!!). In fact, I am doing it right now because my husband and I are looking for a new house, and we found the 'almost perfect one' and for a recovering perfectionist to say that, it must have been pretty darn good. But it had one fatal flaw, and someone else offered on it the same day we saw it, and we decided we couldn't live with this too-small family room, and didn't make an offer. Now, 10 days later, all I can think about is how perfect the woodsy backyard would have been for my kids, and every time I pass a darn tree or a house, I obsess about how we made the wrong decision. So I feel like a shmuck even saying this. It seems so petty when I write it, and you have been through so much and overcome so much. But I just wanted to say that I can really relate. It is what our minds are wired to do, and we just need to keep strong and realize they are thoughts and that we can replace them. I am going to go back through the lesson on obsessive scary thoughts and see if I can't apply some of it to just plain obsessive thinking. Let us know how you are doing.
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Guest
SleeplessMom and Lisa,
Thanks for your responses. I can relate to both of you.
It's sooo easy for me (and us) to start reeling about something and then be so caught up in it before we even realize it. I, unfortunately, am VERY good at that. And I am EXTREMELY analytical, and have a huge attention to detail, but those are traits that make very creative people. And I know my analytical nature has helped me be a good teacher. I can be very in-tune with what kids need (when I'm not caught up in an obsession, of course! ).
I'm also a major perfectionist, which I am realizing more and more, and am trying more and more to work on it.
SleeplessMom, don't feel like a shmuck for obsessing about something like that! That's totally something I would do. It's so easy to get caught up in that. But just think, maybe the next place to look at will have the family room size you want AND the woodsy backyard! And maybe not, but that's okay. You'll find something that fits you.
Thanks for pointing out that I've overcome a lot. I forget this sometimes, and don't really give myself as much credit as I deserve. That's just something else I'll work to improve on!!!
Thanks
Thanks for your responses. I can relate to both of you.
It's sooo easy for me (and us
) to start reeling about something and then be so caught up in it before we even realize it. I, unfortunately, am VERY good at that. And I am EXTREMELY analytical, and have a huge attention to detail, but those are traits that make very creative people. And I know my analytical nature has helped me be a good teacher. I can be very in-tune with what kids need (when I'm not caught up in an obsession, of course! ). I'm also a major perfectionist, which I am realizing more and more, and am trying more and more to work on it.
SleeplessMom, don't feel like a shmuck for obsessing about something like that! That's totally something I would do. It's so easy to get caught up in that. But just think, maybe the next place to look at will have the family room size you want AND the woodsy backyard! And maybe not, but that's okay. You'll find something that fits you.
Thanks for pointing out that I've overcome a lot. I forget this sometimes, and don't really give myself as much credit as I deserve. That's just something else I'll work to improve on!!!
Thanks
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Guest