My Onion

[THH]

Extreams is something I have come to realize triggers my anxeity. Being bored causes me to smoke more, think more,ect... Sometimes I get on the phone and smoke, to kill time. Also when I get bombarded like last Saturday, My dryer broke & its under warentee but dealing with all the people I had to just to get a appointment to have them look at it, Our business is slow, money is tight for almost everyone. Our hay for our horses came, I had to make all the calls to get some help here to help put it away. Fathers Day was Sunday and I'm so happy to have my father still with me, I wanted to make his day special. Back to the money, lack of it, where to spend it first. How to get more business, do we want to pick up more work? How much more and how far do we want to travel. That triggers me. I get out of the moment by jumping way ahead. I think about that treadmill the more wound up I get the more I smoke, my mind takes off and at least now I have learned to see where this is going. Reconize! I picture my self on a horse that is galloping full speed ahead. I...I can take control of the reins and say whoa! Interesting enough a horse has to follow his nose, so if when you pull back, and say whoa!he don't stop, you can take one rein and pull to either side to regain control of the horse. Then I breathe.And think "where do I want to go"? First put out the smoke. 2nd what the next thing I have to deal with, I need help putting the hay up. 3rd Forget the business worries. 4th have my husband look at the dryer first. Ok carry on... I took control back, and problem solved in a few short mins. then went to relax rather then stay spun up. It was not pretty but I got the job done!
Right at the time when you feel the need to distract yourself try to do it mentally with different thoughts.Relax first, Get controll of your thoughts,then ask yourself do I want to play these now? Or what would I like to be doing?

Slow down. Breathe. Think, problem solve, take action.

You have done lots of big things! You are stonger than you think! We have to be grateful for the little things and proud of the big things that we do. Remember it is a process!

I'm doing ok with 3 less smokes.

[NinjaFrodo]

all of those things are very stressful, i can relate to alot of them and if i was still smoking i think just reading that would make me want a cigarette.

Sounds like you are making alot of progress too. You've realized how you are thinking, how its negative, problem solving mode instead of denial and avoidance, positive self-talk, relaxation and you realize how effective you are with your efforts. I think you should change the Yous to Wes in that paragraph before the 3 smokes sentence.

[THH]

LOL... Your right! I never did that well in the self talk session!

Yes on the avoidance mode, too. I have got that bad habit down to a T.
I can see baby changes starting to form, and it is so encouraging. It is also encouraging to have people here for support and make these comments to remind myself, I am over looking something very important. Thank You!

[NinjaFrodo]

Your welcome, it definately is nice when there are people out there that can show us the important things that we miss.


Mike

[NinjaFrodo]

June 21

Did the relaxation cd in the morning.

->had a moderate ammount of drifting thoughts but stuck with it.

->Anxiety dropped from 7 to 5

->Feel I can handle stress slightly better

->feel more excited about who I will become.

[NinjaFrodo]

June 22

Again did the relaxation cd right when i woke up


->again had those distracting thoughts
->anxiety from 7-5
->bit less stressed

[NinjaFrodo]

June 23 (still in progress) Will be editing to fit in the rest of the day

Morning;

1)Relaxation cd (15min);
Tons of racing thoguhts, very difficult to stay focused probabbly because I went to bed at 4am.
Anxiety from 7 to 6
Feel less like doing nothing


2)Confidence Guided Meditation (22min);
Anxiety from 6 to 5
Less racing thoughts, slightly
Bit less stress


3)Wayne Dyer Morning Chant
Anxiety from 5 to 4
Even less stressed
Bit less spacy/bewildered


After workout (8pm)

Relaxation cd
Brought my anxiety level from 3 down to 2
I felt happier and accomplished
I also thought about what you said, THH when it came to the gratitude so i thought of things that i was greatful when that segement of the relaxation cd came up and I did feel greatful.


Just before sleep (3am)
Relaxation cd
Was having a hard time falling a sleep but after using the relaxation cd I fell asleep within minutes.

[THH]

I liked the message in your journal > feel more excited about who I will become.

Good job on keeping things down to a baby roar! I find for myself, after doing the relaxation, go out and do something. Did you notice in your journal that after you did the Wayne Dyer Chants you went to a 4? Action helped you too!

[THH]

When I wake up in the am, if I have those obsesive thoughts, I say to my self what am I thankful for? I make myself lay there, and breathe, and think of my many things to give thanks for. At first it was hard, saying simple things like, Having a nice bed to lay in. Having friends, husband, people in my life to care for and they for me. Thank you for my water I drink, air to breath ect... But I've discovered I can think of a million now days. I then ask myself what amI going to do today? My main accomplishment. Somedays its small, like go to the bank, or store, sometimes it clean the house, visit my family, call a friend. Its a good excersise that helped me. Thought I would share.

[NinjaFrodo]

Mmhm, I've been listening to multiple lesson cds and was really focused on who i was going to become neways but this just was more intense.

Action definately does help...there is something about being vocal that just helps one let go of stress and emotions.

That definately does sound helpful. I remember doing a bit of that before but after a couple times of doing it, it just felt like a chore and didn't really help. I mean I didn't feel the gratitude, it just felt like i was writing down groceries that i had to go by at the store.


Mike